Going bald, and going back...

[level]

It would also be misinforming to deny that looks matter more today than ever. Would FDR or any president with a disability be elected today?

Let's look at the most recent presidents:
Obama - hair
Bush - hair
Clinton - hair
Bush Sr - hair
Reagan - hair
Carter - hair

And they were all decent looking for their age, not fat/short/etc.

I'm not denying that! Therefore, I haven't misinformed anyone. I was just giving facts that contradict fixedby35's post. People come on this forum to get information. It wouldn't be fair for them to read fixed's comment and believe that it's the truth.

I agree that people with hair have an edge. However, I'm not going stay quite in the face of erroneous information.

[[mcr]]

People with hair have an edge not so much because they have hair, but because those who don't let it destroy their confidence. Hair, in and of itself, is pretty useless except to make you look a little younger and prettier.

In other words, if you take two men who are equally confident and comfortable with themselves, and one of them is bald, they would have equal chances of success in every area of life. It's just that the bald one might have a slight disadvantage in the beginning (upon meeting people), but nothing that force of personality cannot overcome.

The other thing is, baldness is a cop-out, and you can settle into a comfortable laziness and blame everything on it. I can't swim because I'm bald. I can't find a woman because I'm bald. I can't get a job because I'm bald. I can't _____ because I'm bald. I myself am guilty of these thoughts at times.

[level]

Your point though not without merit sited a number of leaders who lived before the twentieth century if you wanted to mention a currant leader you might mention Vladimir Putin.

I am not taking sides in this debate but in today's image driven world people sadly choose the better or at least younger looking person.

We live in a youth driven society and some of the young guys on this forum fell robbed of their youth. So even though some of their rants may seem over the top I for one think it is a good place for them to express the frustration they experience.

I agree, mlao. I also think that this is a place where people can vent. But it's one thing to vent and another to make every post about how miserable you are, and then go on to speak about things as if they are 100% correct-without fact checking. Fixed and Keepthehair have close to 1000 posts combined and most of them are negative, to some extent. In other words, they are cluttering every thread with negative comments.

I joined this forum to hear peoples stories and to get information on hair loss. I sympathize with both Fixed and Keep, but I think they would serve the community better, considering the amount of times they post, by not being so negative.

[level]

People with hair have an edge not so much because they have hair, but because those who don't let it destroy their confidence. Hair, in and of itself, is pretty useless except to make you look a little younger and prettier.

In other words, if you take two men who are equally confident and comfortable with themselves, and one of them is bald, they would have equal chances of success in every area of life. It's just that the bald one might have a slight disadvantage in the beginning (upon meeting people), but nothing that force of personality cannot overcome.

The other thing is, baldness is a cop-out, and you can settle into a comfortable laziness and blame everything on it. I can't swim because I'm bald. I can't find a woman because I'm bald. I can't get a job because I'm bald. I can't _____ because I'm bald. I myself am guilty of these thoughts at times.

Well said! We are all guilty of those thoughts. And I'm not immune to it....

I just try not to let it consume me. I have to many people that depend on me-family, wife, dogs, etc. I rather channel that energy towards them, in a positive way.

[Fixed by 35]

When people cite examples of bald leaders, nine times out of ten they're people who were elected before the television era. If you think about it, colour TV also makes baldness look worse than black and white TV did, because it makes thinning far more obvious.

On the rare occasions that bald men succeed (the highest level seems to be US Governor), the other candidate was normally either also bald (that might be how Eisenhower won it); in a party that was deeply unpopular in the region or a crank. Also, in Britain, lots of bald men win seats in the House of Commons, but only because people are voting for their leader, not them personally.

By the way, a little known fact, Winston Churchill never won the popular vote. He was Prime Minister twice, in 1940-45 and 1951-55. The first time, it was due to Neville Chamberlain losing support in the House of Commons and MPs shifting their support to Winston Churchill. The second time, in 1951, Labour actually got more votes but less seats than Churchill's Conservatives. Both leaders in that election were bald. I'm not actually sure when the last time a bald man beat a man with hair to become Prime Minister in Britain and I'm not sure it's ever been done since the advent of party politics! It certainly hasn't been done since the 19th century.

It's hard to understand why people are so superficial. I do have a theory about baldness, that it was a genetic mishap caused by inbreeding in early civilisations. Baldness was at some times in history associated with wealth and status, which led me to this theory. If that were the case, it would give a good reason for why ordinary people subsconsciously don't trust bald politicians.

[jooder]

It can grow very tiresome trying to refute points made by 'fixed by 35'.......people give him examples of succesful bald people but it doesnt make any difference - to him baldness is akin to the end of the world.
I gave examples earlier in this topic of real peoples opinions of bald men...... im sure the sensible people looking at this can draw their own conclusions.
I guess you can either think 'well im bald anyway....so i might as well get fat and lazy and self pitying because i will never amount to anything' OR you can think 'well im bald.... so i will try and improve the other physical aspects of me.... i'll exercise regularly, get my teeth fixed, take care of my skin and dress smartly'.
I know which id choose.

[hdude46]

It can grow very tiresome trying to refute points made by 'fixed by 35'.......people give him examples of succesful bald people but it doesnt make any difference - to him baldness is akin to the end of the world.
I gave examples earlier in this topic of real peoples opinions of bald men...... im sure the sensible people looking at this can draw their own conclusions.
I guess you can either think 'well im bald anyway....so i might as well get fat and lazy and self pitying because i will never amount to anything' OR you can think 'well im bald.... so i will try and improve the other physical aspects of me.... i'll exercise regularly, get my teeth fixed, take care of my skin and dress smartly'.
I know which id choose.

I agree. Why people even bother trying is beyond me. This is the same guy who said he was going to kill himself by the time he is 35 if there isn't a cure for baldness.

He wants to blame all of his life's problems on his baldness. He constantly complains how he is overqualified for his job and he doesn't understand why he won't get promoted but 'people with hair will'. Well here's a thought, you can have all the diplomas and pieces of paper you want that say you are qualified but if you dont have the interpersonal relationship skills none of that will matter. I think its a pretty safe bet to say fixed doesnt have these considering the fact that he said he hasn't seen his friends in two years, hasn't made friends with people he works with, and locks himself up in his house and hardly ever goes out when he isn't working.

The thing is this is a forum that is supposed to help people but how can that happen when you have someone like this guy posting a lot of crap like this. The thing is I think most people would agree with some of his premices that baldness is ugly and in certain parts of life it can set you back. It is especially hard being young and having to deal with this. However it is something that can be overcame and anyone who says otherwise is not being honest or realistic.

Luckily today there are medical treatments (rogaine, propecia, nizoral), surgical treatments (hair transplants), cosmetic treatment (dermatch, nanogen, hair pieces), controversial treatments (lasercomb), and new treatments in the pipeline (prp, histogen, ect.) that help us fight this.

I hope this guy will start seeing things more rationally instead of cluttering the forum with things that support his ridiculous theories and shooting down anyone who tries to present counter examples or talk some sense in him.

[jooder]

Hdude46 - I would agree with everything you said..... except that bald is ugly.......... i guess bald can be ugly depending on the other physical and peronality traits of the individual, but i dont think it can be generalised. There are too many examples of good looking bald men for that to be the case. On all other points though, i am in complete agreement : )

[Ironwil]

Hairloss is only BAD if it's happening to you... no one else gives a sh*t about your hair.

I agree with a lot that you've said, but I have to disagree here. It's a plain fact that men will have an easier time getting women if they have a full head of hair. This is especially true with younger women, say in their 20's. I'm 37, already have a wife and do not suffer from extreme hair loss, so I'm not speaking from an island of self-pity.

There are a lot of factors that go into how easily a person moves around socially, the most important one being self-image. Another truth (agreeing with part of your meaning here) is that most of the social suffering men go through after hair loss is due to a lessened confidence they feel. Like I said, there are a lot of factors, and getting new hair isn't going to fix everything. Even so, I can flatly state that I hate my thin spot with a vengeance. I'm not sure that I'll elect to get HT done, but I do know that I'd be a much happier man if I could get back to 'normal'. It's not to meet women or increase my social status. I just hate the thin spot.

Really hate it.

One thing that has worked well for me is Minoxidil. I grab the generic version of it at Walmart and have a 3-month supply for $20. It's done a lot to regrow my hair, but the thin spot remains, and the war wages on.

[jooder]

'It's a plain fact that men will have an easier time getting women if they have a full head of hair. This is especially true with younger women, say in their 20's. I'm 37, already have a wife and do not suffer from extreme hair loss, so I'm not speaking from an island of self-pity.'

I have been balding for 10 years....im 31 now with a shaven head. I have never had a problem getting girlfriends and have had more girlfriends than many of my friends with full heads of hair.
I agree that having hair gives you more options.... and certainly less stress in life....so it is therefore preferable given the option. I just dont agree that hair versus bald is so clear cut..... just as a size 8 woman with ginger hair versus a size 12 woman with blonde hair isnt. Its about personal choice.

[hdude46]

'It's a plain fact that men will have an easier time getting women if they have a full head of hair. This is especially true with younger women, say in their 20's. I'm 37, already have a wife and do not suffer from extreme hair loss, so I'm not speaking from an island of self-pity.'

I have been balding for 10 years....im 31 now with a shaven head. I have never had a problem getting girlfriends and have had more girlfriends than many of my friends with full heads of hair.
I agree that having hair gives you more options.... and certainly less stress in life....so it is therefore preferable given the option. I just dont agree that hair versus bald is so clear cut..... just as a size 8 woman with ginger hair versus a size 12 woman with blonde hair isnt. Its about personal choice.

I have been receding since college and I also have been with just as good if not better looking girls than most of my friends. To some girls, yes, having hair will matter, but to most, and I'm not just saying this to make people here feel better, but it really doesn't matter that much. I know four girls pretty well who are drop dead gorgeous, and I mean really really hot, and all their bf's are balding, one pretty badly. This is not to say that if you are out at the bar it might be harder to make that initial first impression if you are balding, but rather that it can be overcome just like a lot of things in life.

I think younger people are more affected by it since they are statistically in the minority and most of their friends havent been affected by mbp yet. I think as you get older, you gain more perspective and can deal with it better, especially knowing more and more people are going thru it with you.

[Ironwil]

I have been receding since college and I also have been with just as good if not better looking girls than most of my friends. To some girls, yes, having hair will matter, but to most, and I'm not just saying this to make people here feel better, but it really doesn't matter that much.

Like I was saying, there are many factors that go into the equation. The fact that you did better with girls than your friends with hair doesn't mean that the hair issue wasn't an issue. It means that you, when taken in as a whole, were more attractive to the ladies. This is a good thing, but the only point I was making is that balding men are going to face a steeper hill to climb than men who have a full head of hair. There will always be specific instances that differ, and I wouldn't dispute that at all. I'm speaking in generalities.

I think it's great you do so well with the fairer sex. I've done well for myself, so it's not like I'm saying it can't be done. Only that there are obstacles.

[Batz32]

I've worked in a variety of corporate roles for a number of large financial institutions, including one of the big four accountancy firms and within the private banking arm of one of the largest ten banks in the world.




I don't know about in Britian, but I have worked for 2 of the big 4 and all the top guys are bald. All the senior managers are bald and all the partners are bald or have horrendous hair. I mean accountants are ugly people in general, lets not lie to ourselves by that. When I started I had a full head of hair and it started to recede and I hated thinking about it so I started to shave it. I moved up the ladder faster than anyone else I worked with.

I work hard and I'm very specialized in my field. I have been able to move on and become a partner in a regional firm, Big 4 required too much time and I like having my own clients.

As to women, for awhile I wouldn't talk to women because of the hair loss. However, in hanging out with some of my exs, they all told me they dated me for my personality, being in shape or as one put it my balls. So I grew my set back dropped them in a wheel barrel and went to town. When I see a chick I like I go talk to her, and most of the time I get the number and a date. The other night I was at a bar with some younger new hires who wanted to go out, and one of them was an a really good looking guy. However, he wouldn't approach women. So I did it and he winged and had to take the less attractive chick.

2020 is right its not the hair, its the total package. You may be missing a piece, but everyone is missing something.

Lastly, if you spend all your time worrying about what people think of your hair you will forget the fact that they are worrying about what you think of them.

[chewytorch]

lol no offense 2020 but it's easy for you to say this now that you're through this phase. Also, you stated that you looked good with a bald head. There are people out there that the only thing that makes them look somewhat attractive is there hair. Once they start losing even a little bit of it, it is noticeable. I am one of those people. Now I don't believe all this crap about "bald people can't be successful, no one will elect bald politicians" because obviously, those kinds of things are all achieved by how smart you are and your skills, not how bald you are. But I do believe that if your hair makes you look attractive, then you start losing it, women will not speak to you as much, your confidence will shoot down, and you will become a bit if not completely anti-social. Just wish someone would reply to my thread and tell me what to do while I still have time .

[Fixed by 35]

If you understand that baldness leads to lower confidence and less attention from women, and it does, then it is a logical conclusion that you will be discriminated against in the workplace and in politics. For example, women's preferences in polls have typically shown that they vote in large numbers against bald candidates (men don't seem to care); so much for the claims on the internet that bald is beautiful! Presumably they display the same discrimination towards bald colleagues in the workplace.

The trouble is that the theory that women don't mind baldness is a work of fiction. For a start, watch bald guys in public places trying to pick up women; they nearly always fail because women don't even want to speak to them. All other things being equal women will always choose a man with hair, and all other things are equal until a woman knows who you are! As a result, the hurdle for bald men to get women is huge, hence why they seem desperate to get into a relationship if they can get that far (bald men are typically either single or in a long term relationship). Bald men are also typically matched with women far less attractive than they would be if they had hair, or alternatively with needy, demanding, high maintenance women.

Sure, there's a bald fetish that gets wide currency on the internet, in the same way as 'BBW' women do. It doesn't mean it's the norm.