Life isn't worth living if you're bald.

[Joan]

I'm a 19 year old guy who lost well over half my hair the entire top is about 25% left from thinning it was clear through any light, I shaved it to the skin and am not looking back. I still do youthful things, I got licensed on skydiving, I continue to go to all the college parties, I never shy away from speaking my mind to people of any age, and you know what life continues. I have been through a lot in my life, a lot personal but right before the hairloss I lost my father to a slow disease that made him suffer, combined with me getting many stressful tests to make sure I wouldn't inherit some of it. The year was complete hell but I'm not letting it stop me, I do admit hairloss sucks and besides my pale conplection I pull of shaved well, but when I feel sorry for myself I know my father who was very military would say 'so what, you lost your hair, it's time to grow some balls and take what you want regardless.' NEVER let it define you, I have always had high standards when it comes to girls and you know what I still do with my cue ball look, I still would never lower them, because out of 3 guys in thier 20's I know who shave their heads 2 of them are with beautiful women they met after they already shaved their heads. One of the women is gorgeous, and no they aren't rich, the 3rd is an out of shape slob and that is more likely why he wasn't as successful. So I still plan on getting married in my twenties to a girl I find gorgeous (a girl I was talking to seen me with a shaved head and you know what she didn't care one damn bit, commented on it said it fit well and moved on with our night) I still plan on having fun. I still plan on jumping from planes like I love to do. In fact I prefer the shaved head now, it makes you stand out. Yeah I don't look like that pretty boy American eagle model who had everything handed to him, I look like a young man who's been through enough to know that hair is an accessory and does not stop me getting the job I want, the character I have, or I the girl I'm attracted too. I Don't mean to downplay hairloss young believe me I was stressed at first too. But when I shaved it, I was a lot more mature and free, and alot of girls like that over some boy who spends all morning making sure his hair gelled just right. Live, Love, and fight on my friend.

I hope my son (19 like you, losing hair since he turned 18) has your attitude when the day comes he buzzes his hair down. Sorry about your dad. I lost mine when I was 28 to pancreatic cancer and still think of him every day. My husband was diagnosed over a year ago with a highly hereditary chronic disease--when it rains, it pours, right?

[BeaveCake]

The level of denial in this thread is way too high.

Why can't you just accept that balding is a big problem for an individual?

I'm coming in late but from all I've read guys like me and munky here can't admit it because we don't believe it, and have seen proof otherwise. The original question was 'why continue on' and when people do what should be done on a support forum and give examples of how it's about a mindset ALONGSIDE looks we get treated like crap because we disagree with you. There's a quote I think applies to the guys who don't believe bald guys can still be successful- "For those who believe no proof is necessary, for those who doubt no proof is enough' munkey and I respectfully disagree with you but then get attacked for it. You know why there aren't many guys here posting how great life is continuing on bald?? Because they are out living those lives and have better things to do then post here, making an account on this sit was one of my poorer choices and I've only logged on about 3 times.

[BeaveCake]

That's the truth. Have you ever thought about how much of life you missed out on because of your hair loss ? Well, we lose a lot. Everything from asking that girl out that we've always wanted to, being youthful and doing stupid things because you can, being the life of the party, leading the way at work cause you're not afraid to etc. Very rarely do I ever see a bald man leading anything, and if it ever happens, I wonder why there isn't a guy with a full head of hair to replace him. Hair loss, especially when you're young, forces you to grow up. Have you ever seen a 30 year old with a full head of hair skateboarding and looked back twice ? Probably not, but what happens if that 30 year old was slick bald ? Thoughts like this would likely run through your head: "Isn't he too old to be doing that ? Creep, grow up and act your age."

Every time I see a bald man driving a sports car, I think he's going through some sort of midlife crisis because he's to old to be driving a car like that, but a 50 year old with a full head of hair is never to old to be young. What about online dating ? What do you do when you go on a dating website, do you search from 20-30, or do you search from 30-40 because that's how old you look ? This disease is embarrassing, not only does it completely disfigure most men, it also holds you back in every aspect of life. You'll never be "the man" again. You'll never have the confidence that you once did when you had hair, and even if you do, people just think you're an over confident idiot who needs to know his place. You're days are over and you're expired, regardless of your actual age. So remind me again, what's the point of living such a life ?

I'm a 19 year old guy who lost well over half my hair the entire top is about 25% left from thinning it was clear through any light, I shaved it to the skin and am not looking back. I still do youthful things, I got licensed on skydiving, I continue to go to all the college parties, I never shy away from speaking my mind to people of any age, and you know what life continues. I have been through a lot in my life, a lot personal but right before the hairloss I lost my father to a slow disease that made him suffer, combined with me getting many stressful tests to make sure I wouldn't inherit some of it. The year was complete hell but I'm not letting it stop me, I do admit hairloss sucks and besides my pale conplection I pull of shaved well, but when I feel sorry for myself I know my father who was very military would say 'so what, you lost your hair, it's time to grow some balls and take what you want regardless.' NEVER let it define you, I have always had high standards when it comes to girls and you know what I still do with my cue ball look, I still would never lower them, because out of 3 guys in thier 20's I know who shave their heads 2 of them are with beautiful women they met after they already shaved their heads. One of the women is gorgeous, and no they aren't rich, the 3rd is an out of shape slob and that is more likely why he wasn't as successful. So I still plan on getting married in my twenties to a girl I find gorgeous (a girl I was talking to seen me with a shaved head and you know what she didn't care one damn bit, commented on it said it fit well and moved on with our night) I still plan on having fun. I still plan on jumping from planes like I love to do. In fact I prefer the shaved head now, it makes you stand out. Yeah I don't look like that pretty boy American eagle model who had everything handed to him, I look like a young man who's been through enough to know that hair is an accessory and does not stop me getting the job I want, the character I have, or I the girl I'm attracted too. I Don't mean to downplay hairloss young believe me I was stressed at first too. But when I shaved it, I was a lot more mature and free, and alot of girls like that over some boy who spends all morning making sure his hair gelled just right. Live, Love, and fight on my friend.

[johnsmith]

Won't you even consider a FUE?

See Gerhard, I'd like to give some hope, but I'm sure he's going to reply:

"A FUE? Not good enough! I want my teenage hair line and thickness back!"

No, I appreciate the suggestion, but I have personally known three guys who received FUEs and HTs, but as the normal loss continued elsewhere, their new hairs continued growing, and they became bald behind where the new hairs were placed. It looked far worse than just being bald with a shaved head. I'm just not one to grasp at straws, my friend. When there is a real cure, we'll all know it, but as many have stated, it is highly unlikely that it will happen in our lifetime, unless there is some kind of accidental discovery. There just isn't much interest, relatively speaking, in eradicating male pattern baldness.

I think that the people who grasp at straws like drugs that sort of work a little bit sometimes when the moon is just right, but also come with bad side effects, or HTs that look terrible in a few years, are the same kind who will go into a mall and buy a pair of shoes a size too small or too large because they don't have his size in stock and they want those new shoes right now. When I go to the store, if they don't have exactly what I want, I leave empty handed and look elsewhere. It really is the best way. Why pay for what you don't want?

[Gerhard]

Why don't you make the best of what you have then?

I can tell you, leaving the house as a NW2.5 with OK coverage feels very different than leaving the house with a slick NW5.

Especially when you're 25 like me.

I do, brother. The whole reason I'm on here is to hopefully find something better than fine to take away all the issues. If it comes that's ****ing great, if not it'll be a shame, but I'll survive, you know? My hair isn't half bad sometimes, but I'll still ultimately end up buzzing it down or getting a HT to rock a Zinedine when I'm older. I like the look of a nice buzzed hairline, always have so mines a little weak, haha. It would just make me feel I look better irrespective of crown thinning (which I don't have yet). But that's me.

We should all make do with what we have and accept it but theres nothing wrong with wanting better. Everything is wrong with making that desire an obsession though when it starts overtaking aspects or your life.

I've seen your FUE, if I saw you in public I'd think you were a NW2 or maybe a 3 (been a while since I checked, but pretty sure 2) who buzzes. You look good, Fred.

[fred970]

Why don't you make the best of what you have then?

I can tell you, leaving the house as a NW2.5 with OK coverage feels very different than leaving the house with a slick NW5.

Especially when you're 25 like me.

[Gerhard]

Won't you even consider a FUE?

See Gerhard, I'd like to give some hope, but I'm sure he's going to reply:

"A FUE? Not good enough! I want my teenage hair line and thickness back!"

Honestly, if that's the case then he'll be here a long time. I understand an FUE or an HT in general isn't ideal. We all wish we could take a pill and pop out all of our original hair. It sucks that we can't, it honestly does. But he's gotta learn to either accept the hand he's been given and make the most of it or he can carry on as he has because that's ALL we've got.

[fred970]

I know. I harbor no such hope, but the medical community and pharmaceutical companies have never received a single penny from me. When Rogaine showed up, and the doctors said, "Well, it might work a little or slow down your losses," I said no thanks. I said the same to the other snake oils. I've never spent a penny on any of it. Why bother? If something came along that really worked, I knew that it would be headline news and treatment centers would be cropping up all over. Besides, what's the use of having a full head of hair if it robs you of your masculinity, or makes you grow man-boobs, become impotent, etc. No thanks! They'll get my money when they come out with the real deal, otherwise, they can forget it.

Won't you even consider a FUE?

See Gerhard, I'd like to give some hope, but I'm sure he's going to reply:

"A FUE? Not good enough! I want my teenage hair line and thickness back!"

[Gerhard]

Yet here you are with us, worried about your baldness to some degree, my young friend. You do see that, right? The synopsis of your entire post is, "Hey, I'm not as worried about it as some of you, and you should be more like me." Okay, I get that.

Of course I'm worried and of course I care, brother. But at the end of the day you need to accept and aggrandizing the problem so you don't furthere exacerbate it. You sound like you've got the template for a solid, meaningful life and at the rate you're going you will die with the paranoia and sadness of hair loss without ever have achieved a greater happiness because you always allowed something to hold you back. It sucks, brother, it does, but you and Fred have given it the power to surpass reason and to turn into a life ending prognosis.

[johnsmith]

I'm not going to say being bald is a walk in the park. I'm 19 and either a 2.5 or a 3 on the Norwood scale. All I can say to this thread is "Wow" though. Like, no shit. I understand as NotCoolAnymore said that it is mainly about self perception. Few notice I'm balding and those that I make aware shrug and tell me that my face more than makes up for it and I'm fine, but even still I'm self conscious about it. The amount of self-pity, self-wallowing, self-depreciating, and overall NARCISSISM from you guys though is ****ing astounding. John, buck up and get your ass out there. You're at an age when this shit is WAY more accepted, you have the fortune to be good looking, AND well off. You're successful, man. Quit making it sound like you can't breed because your kids would be genetically inferior for not having hair. Do you understand how ****ing SAD that is to actually see someone write?

FFS, this is unreal. The fact that some of you are agreeing with what he's saying is just ****ing outrageous. And before you knock me down with the whole "You're not a high enough norwood to understand!" to that I say **** off. I get it, my hair loss ISN'T as bad as yours YET, but I still have more recession than your average 19 year old and will likely be right when you all are some day. You guys make it sound like life is over, all things are meaningless, etc.

****ing man up and accept that a NW1 isn't your life. You aren't gonna get that. I've finally made peace with that and I've decided that if push comes to shove I'll get an HT, thicken up my frontal and temporal zones, let my crown go slick bald and rock a Zinedine Zidane. Why? Because although it isn't what I want it's the best I can do and I can LIVE with that. I know I will still be found attractive and worthwhile.

****, this thread is full of BDD sufferers and that's coming from someone WITH BDD.

Fred, you're free from baldness. I've seen your thread, you look like you have a passable full head of hair if you keep it short (which is how you like) so WHY ARE YOU SUPPORTING THIS SHIT!? Tell them to get a cosmetic surgery, make due with the grafts you can maintain or have left and ****ing buck up because that's what YOU finally did. Give some ****ing hope, man.

Yet here you are with us, worried about your baldness to some degree, my young friend. You do see that, right? The synopsis of your entire post is, "Hey, I'm not as worried about it as some of you, and you should be more like me." Okay, I get that.

[Gerhard]

I'm not going to say being bald is a walk in the park. I'm 19 and either a 2.5 or a 3 on the Norwood scale. All I can say to this thread is "Wow" though. Like, no shit. I understand as NotCoolAnymore said that it is mainly about self perception. Few notice I'm balding and those that I make aware shrug and tell me that my face more than makes up for it and I'm fine, but even still I'm self conscious about it. The amount of self-pity, self-wallowing, self-depreciating, and overall NARCISSISM from you guys though is ****ing astounding. John, buck up and get your ass out there. You're at an age when this shit is WAY more accepted, you have the fortune to be good looking, AND well off. You're successful, man. Quit making it sound like you can't breed because your kids would be genetically inferior for not having hair. Do you understand how ****ing SAD that is to actually see someone write?

FFS, this is unreal. The fact that some of you are agreeing with what he's saying is just ****ing outrageous. And before you knock me down with the whole "You're not a high enough norwood to understand!" to that I say **** off. I get it, my hair loss ISN'T as bad as yours YET, but I still have more recession than your average 19 year old and will likely be right when you all are some day. You guys make it sound like life is over, all things are meaningless, etc.

****ing man up and accept that a NW1 isn't your life. You aren't gonna get that. I've finally made peace with that and I've decided that if push comes to shove I'll get an HT, thicken up my frontal and temporal zones, let my crown go slick bald and rock a Zinedine Zidane. Why? Because although it isn't what I want it's the best I can do and I can LIVE with that. I know I will still be found attractive and worthwhile.

****, this thread is full of BDD sufferers and that's coming from someone WITH BDD.

Fred, you're free from baldness. I've seen your thread, you look like you have a passable full head of hair if you keep it short (which is how you like) so WHY ARE YOU SUPPORTING THIS SHIT!? Tell them to get a cosmetic surgery, make due with the grafts you can maintain or have left and ****ing buck up because that's what YOU finally did. Give some ****ing hope, man.

[johnsmith]

This is unlikely to happen within the lifespan of anyone posting here.

I know. I harbor no such hope, but the medical community and pharmaceutical companies have never received a single penny from me. When Rogaine showed up, and the doctors said, "Well, it might work a little or slow down your losses," I said no thanks. I said the same to the other snake oils. I've never spent a penny on any of it. Why bother? If something came along that really worked, I knew that it would be headline news and treatment centers would be cropping up all over. Besides, what's the use of having a full head of hair if it robs you of your masculinity, or makes you grow man-boobs, become impotent, etc. No thanks! They'll get my money when they come out with the real deal, otherwise, they can forget it.

[johnsmith]

Depressing read, that last post. Fortunately one I know is not true at all. True some younger women are seriously bothered by it, later in life... Heck it doesn't matter anywhere near as much as you guys are attempting to suggest it does.

I have far more luck with women now than I ever have had and have the least amount of hair I have ever had. Granted I am confident, have a reasonably supply of money, do interesting things and keep them intellectually stimulated.

If you decide to crawl into a hole and die because you have lost your hair so be it. I'll just continue to do what I do because it seems to work just fine and I appear to have a steady supply of pretty hot women.

One thing you guys need to realize is that most people hate a chunk of their bodies and women are no exception. Pretty much any girl I have ever dated who has had kids is of the opinion they are permanently ruined and not worth looking at naked so celebrate and take advantage of their self loathing and live a little.

I've mentioned before that not only do I have glorious hair loss but am also cursed with having psoriasis which, if you do not know, is a lovely skin condition which can appear on all sorts of parts of your body and is raised red leisions of the skin which also cracks and bleeds and times. I think 'disgusting' when I look at it - but despite this girls are like 'it's not that bad' and get into bed with me anyway.

Work your other assets, improve yourself until you feel confident in yourself, and enjoy your damned lives. Grow some cojones maybe and lay it down. It really isn't as impossible as some of you have lead yourselves to believe.

Or, alternatively, feel free to wallow in your misery and despair and complain about a completely natural part of the aging process.

Christ.

I have to ask, why are you here worrying about your hairloss, instead of out there enjoying life? Why spend even a second thinking about it if it doesn't bother you, my friend?

Maybe someday, the medical community will cure this disease, but until then, everyone here is worried about it to some degree. If I'm more concerned about it than you, isn't it hypocritical of you to say so, when you are also worried about it?

One of the most hard-hitting videos that I ever saw aired about a decade ago on The Learning Channel. It was a story of a man in his early 30s who had very hideous teeth. Other than that, he was a very handsome guy (and no, I'm not gay, I'm just saying...). He had handsome features, was very fit, had a full head of nice hair, a good personality, and was well educated. His teeth were just a disaster. It was something far beyond the ability of braces or minor dental surgery to correct. He required VERY major and extensive dental surgery, but he couldn't afford it. I forget what happened to allow him to afford it, but one day, he suddenly had the ability to be treated by one of the most renowned cosmetic dental surgeons in the world. It took a couple of months, but in the end, they managed to give this guy a perfect smile. When he first saw himself in the mirror, he broke completely down. He was so overwhelmed with joy that it literally brought him to his knees and he was sobbing uncontrollably, as though the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders.

It was an amazing story. I imagine that many of us would be like that if we were suddenly able to walk into a futuristic genetic hair treatment center and have our DNA fully repaired and instructed to grow good, natural, youthful hair for the rest of our lives. Well, we wouldn't have the sudden shock of seeing the end result, of course, but imagine your first great haircut in a few months. I guess it's nice to dream, because that's the extent of what we have right now.

[walrus]

If and when the medical community comes out with a real, legitimate fix AT THE GENETIC LEVEL

This is unlikely to happen within the lifespan of anyone posting here.

[johnsmith]

johnsmith: You're in your late 40s; I'm a bit older at a "young" 52. Just wondering if you're finding it hard to attract women your age, since baldness wouldn't even be on my list of negatives if I were single. Hair or no hair means nothing to me, and I would think most women in their 40s would feel the same. Maybe I'm wrong?

Hi Joan. Thank you for your insights. What I find is that I dial my own standards WAY BACK. When I see a woman that I am fairly sure would be attracted to me if I had a full head of hair, I immediately find myself wondering why she would be interested in me beyond my money, ability to provide for her, other admirable qualities, etc. I see baldness as something she would have to "look beyond", which is a major downer. So, I end up lowering my standards, and still, it's difficult to get the kind of responses one would expect, because most people, me included, are immediately drawn to looks, and most women see hairloss as an immediate show stopper, much the same as most guys will bypass fat women, ugly women, etc. The cold hard truth is that good hair helps to define us in the eyes of many women. Not all, but definitely most. If it weren't VERY important, this forum simply wouldn't exist.

So, yes, when I approach a woman that I am attracted to, my VERY first thought is, "I wonder if she will be okay with me being mostly bald?" Plus, women want confidence in a man, and hair loss robs most of us of that.