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  1. #1
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    Unhappy Dealing with breakup, but thinking of hair

    My girlfriend of about 10 months and I broke up this weekend, and I am pretty crushed. It know it wouldn't have worked out long term because she is moving several states away and our feelings just aren't strong enough to make it work, but it still hurts big time.

    Besides dealing with the turmoil of a breakup, I can't help but continue to obsess about my hairloss. It was always comforting to know that she truly didn't care (or so she said), which helped ease the constant negative thoughts I had about my balding scalp.

    Just hours after the breakup I am thinking a lot about my hair...the thought of being single again with an ever-balding scalp terrifies me. It truly makes me feel like there is an expiration date for me for finding an attractive, decent girl. If anyone has similar thoughts or any advice, it would be much appreciated.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Notcoolanymore's Avatar
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    Scoots,

    I feel your pain. I am currently going through my own fair share of relationship issues right now so I can relate. This is your thread though, so I wont get into my own problems and high jack your thread.

    Some questions that I am sure others will ask: Your age? How bad is your hair loss? Are your treating with anything? If so how long, and how are you responding?

    If you just started losing hair, I would strongly recommend that you start treating asap. I am sure you know about what is currently available, if not you are in the right place.

    Lastly, just because you are losing your hair doesn't mean you have to settle for somebody below par(to put it nicely). Hair definitely has an effect on your looks, I am not going to try to convince you it doesn't. There are other factors that are in your control that you can use in your favor: your physique, style, finances, personality, etc. Work on those and you will put yourself in a much better position to attract the type of girl that you want.

  3. #3
    Doctor Representative 35YrsAfter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scoots View Post
    My girlfriend of about 10 months and I broke up this weekend, and I am pretty crushed. It know it wouldn't have worked out long term because she is moving several states away and our feelings just aren't strong enough to make it work, but it still hurts big time.

    Besides dealing with the turmoil of a breakup, I can't help but continue to obsess about my hairloss. It was always comforting to know that she truly didn't care (or so she said), which helped ease the constant negative thoughts I had about my balding scalp.

    Just hours after the breakup I am thinking a lot about my hair...the thought of being single again with an ever-balding scalp terrifies me. It truly makes me feel like there is an expiration date for me for finding an attractive, decent girl. If anyone has similar thoughts or any advice, it would be much appreciated.
    A bad hair transplant is worse than natural hair loss and baldness. I made the most of my bad hair transplant years ago and met the most wonderful woman who has been my wife for just short of 25 years. Women see things very differently than men. Breakups are depressing. I have been through several and looking back, those women were just not right for me and would have given me a life of trouble. Peace should dominate a relationship, not conflict and stress.

    IMO, you should do as much as possible to maintain your hair. There are a lot more options available today so try to stay positive. Intense workouts helped me through the worst of it. Endorphins can "wash" away some of the pain from a breakup and of course working out, helps to move your life in a positive direction.

    35YrsAfter also posts as CITNews and works at Dr. Cole's office
    Cole Hair Transplant
    1070 Powers Place
    Alpharetta, Georgia 30009
    Phone 678-566-1011
    The contents of my posts are my opinions and not medical advice
    Last edited by 35YrsAfter; 02-22-2015 at 04:49 PM.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Buster's Avatar
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    I've gone through the same situation. I was in a long term relationship and when we separated I was excited at the idea of meeting new girls, but then I started becoming obsessed with my hair, because you want to look your best when you're out there. One thing that I'd recommend is to start working out. For me, I started getting excited about the transformation of my body, and didn't think about my hair quite as much.

  5. #5
    Senior Member fred970's Avatar
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    Try to become a funnier and more interesting person. Cultivate yourself, it can truly do wonders to improve your chances with women.

    I would not recommend bodybuilding, just try to remain fit. Girls keep telling me how muscles look unattractive.

    A cousin of mine tried to compensate for his ugliness by working out, now he can't stop. He's on steroids and just want to get bigger and bigger. Now he looks like a freak.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Notcoolanymore's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fred970 View Post
    Try to become a funnier and more interesting person. Cultivate yourself, it can truly do wonders to improve your chances with women.

    I would not recommend bodybuilding, just try to remain fit. Girls keep telling me how muscles look unattractive.

    A cousin of mine tried to compensate for his ugliness by working out, now he can't stop. He's on steroids and just want to get bigger and bigger. Now he looks like a freak.
    I always thought women want a guy with at least some muscle tone. I don't mean the big body builder type, but at least somebody that is cut. I guess you can get away with not working out and just being thin when you are young, but when you get older it doesn't look very good.

  7. #7
    Doctor Representative 35YrsAfter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Notcoolanymore View Post
    I always thought women want a guy with at least some muscle tone. I don't mean the big body builder type, but at least somebody that is cut. I guess you can get away with not working out and just being thin when you are young, but when you get older it doesn't look very good.
    Nearly all women will prefer the bodybuilder when the alternative is the dude with a beer belly.
    Last edited by 35YrsAfter; 02-22-2015 at 04:49 PM.

  8. #8
    Senior Member fred970's Avatar
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    Being thin is genetic for some. They can't do much to change it with diet or bodybuilding.

    Just being thin/fit is good, any gain beyond that is just useless, especially in my country where it rains 75% of the time.

    It's easier, cheaper and more productive to become more interesting than to dedicate your life to bodybuilding which is insanely expensive, probably one the most expensive hobbies there is: eating for 3 people, the protein shakes/supplements, the gym, the discipline, the time needed.

    People don't know the harm they could cause when they just thow "Just work out and the ladies will love you! You don't want to or your say you can't? You're lazy!"

  9. #9
    Doctor Representative 35YrsAfter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fred970 View Post
    Being thin is genetic for some. They can't do much to change it with diet or bodybuilding.

    Just being thin/fit is good, any gain beyond that is just useless, especially in my country where it rains 75% of the time.
    Mt. Waialeale on the Hawaiian island of Kauai in some years rains 99% of the time. Are you in the UK?
    Last edited by 35YrsAfter; 02-22-2015 at 04:49 PM.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by fred970 View Post
    Being thin is genetic for some. They can't do much to change it with diet or bodybuilding.

    Just being thin/fit is good, any gain beyond that is just useless, especially in my country where it rains 75% of the time.

    It's easier, cheaper and more productive to become more interesting than to dedicate your life to bodybuilding which is insanely expensive, probably one the most expensive hobbies there is: eating for 3 people, the protein shakes/supplements, the gym, the discipline, the time needed.

    People don't know the harm they could cause when they just thow "Just work out and the ladies will love you! You don't want to or your say you can't? You're lazy!"

    You're hilarious, though.

    Bald and skinny > Bald and muscles?
    Sorry, not a chance.

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