29, virgin, weighing hair options

[aannddyy]

Lets be honest, no one really ever wants to go bald. Ive been half way there since i was like 16 but I never let it own me, people make jokes and laugh at me about it, I have even been called Benjamin button before, obviously that was an extremely hilarious joke for everyone (other than me) involved.
The thing is if you have alot of self confidence, regardless of how you look, girls will be interested in you.
I am pretty impressed that so many guys think its really hard to get a girl to have sex with you but the big truth is its not, BUT! if that is your only aim when you meet them they will just think your seedy (sometimes i enjoy this) they wont be keen on you at all.
Out of all of my best mates I am the only one who is half way bald and I have had sex the most times out of all of us, one of them who has lots of hair and is rich still hasn't managed to have sex with any girls despite my attempts at helping him.
My best advice for anyone else in my shoes, laugh at yourself if everyone else is ( they are just trying to get a reaction from you, if they don't they will stop) when your out in public pump out your chest make sure you put at least a little effort on your face like shaving and teeth or whatever. Focus on the good aspects about yourself not the bad ones, if you do everyone else will eventually get the vibe too. You don't need to be honestly confident either, act if you need to, once you notice the girls checking you out you wont need to act anymore.
Not so long ago a girl who I made out with, requiring no effort at all went home with all her mates and told them all I looked like a seedy old man but she liked me because I was confident about myself. Don't let what anyone else says about you affect your confidence because I CAN tell you with ALL of my confidence that there will be another person in their place that thinks the exact opposite thing.
The worst thing you can do is hide yourself from everyone else, if you sit inside all day and never go out thats why your alone, not your hair. If someone with lots of hair did that they would be in the exact same boat as you.

[VictimOfDHT]

Thanks Andy for the advise however, you probably know it's easier said than done. If mind control were so easy they'd be no need for psychologists, drugs and all kind of therapies.. The fact is it isn't easy to do that at all unless you have it in you. Some people are plain ugly but they have so much confidence in themselves that they don't give a **** about nobody. Those people are LUCKY to have that in them. On the other hand, there are people who are very good looking or attractive but they have ZERO confidence in themselves.... So, it's all in your mind and unfortunately, the mind is one very very tough nut to crack. What people DON'T want to realize is that it ISN'T a switch that you can turn on and off whenever you like. NO. It ISN'T that simple, otherwise there will be NO mentally tortured people. There will be no mental disorders, self-confidence issues, esteem problems....at all.

And even with all kind of help (psychologists, therapies, drugs...) many people still continue to suffer from the same problems even after years of treatment. It just proves that for most of us, we ARE what we ARE and no matter how much we do to try and change ourselves (minds) we can never do it. I always tell people your mind is just like any other physical part of your body that you are given whether you like it or not. You can't change the color of your skin, eyes, hair...You can't change your height, your natural talents, your genes...

But again andy, like I said, this isn't about women or whatever. Obviously, there are millions and millions of women who are with bald men. That's no secret. This is something that we want for ourselves. We don't want to look disfigured by this curse. As long as there are mirrors around, we could never live with this shit called "baldness".

[mothernature]

great post andy (and response by DHT victim)

but tbh ur probably good looking even when goin bald thats why u get these girls + ur confidence like u said is also a big factor

[Havok]

i agree with victimofDHT. attracting girls and impressing them with our looks is just the byproduct of having hair and not the goal. we want hair for ourselves, to make ourselves feel good. i think it's great that some guys can maintain their confidence after going bald but unfortunately most men on TBH suffer from real pain.

[VictimOfDHT]

great post andy (and response by DHT victim)

but tbh ur probably good looking even when goin bald thats why u get these girls + ur confidence like u said is also a big factor

Thanks, mothernature.
I was gonna say that. Obviously if a man is good looking and he loses his hair he can still be attractive to women. The same thing cannot be said about every man however.

[jooder]

Andy - Very good post.
I used to visit this site a while ago and make the same arguments.
Many people have said that you look like your 40 when your actually in your 20's because of balding. That to me is absurd.
I have shaved my head since i was 18.....now nw5 and 32. I have been told i look younger than i am numerous times......so therefore baldness alone must not equate to looking older.
I think its much more to do with demeanour, confidence and looking after yourself.

[t-bone]

Gosh I don't know where to start? Get Nizoral shampoo for psoriasis 2x week let it sit for five minutes.You may need prescription strength.
Go find a Dr.who does PRP with Acell and get that done 1x than wait 3mo. and repeat and do this a few times and it will make the hair you have really look its best! You want to keep what you have in good condition because cloning is around the corner.I would also look into diet because generally people with psoriasis have to stay away from dairy and red meats.and usually they need to really watch their diets.
Do not wear a wig! Everyone will know and you will look like a fool!
It is better to take care of yourself and look the best you can without resorting to anything cosmetic or ridiculous. Good luck! Be happy with yourself and woman will follow.

[Havok]

Andy - Very good post.
I used to visit this site a while ago and make the same arguments.
Many people have said that you look like your 40 when your actually in your 20's because of balding. That to me is absurd.
I have shaved my head since i was 18.....now nw5 and 32. I have been told i look younger than i am numerous times......so therefore baldness alone must not equate to looking older.
I think its much more to do with demeanour, confidence and looking after yourself.

you're right baldness alone does not equate to someone looking much older. unfortunately, it's a huge part of the reason for majority of men. fortunately, it isn't for you.

[jooder]

For some men baldness = depression. Depression = comfort eating, little exercise, lack of grooming, lack of confidence.
The result - a bald, overweight man, unhealthy looking skin, poor hygiene and poor posture. A man who looks older than his years because of all these factors.
If you can manage to remain confident and exercise well you break the vicious cycle.
eg. Andre Agassi, Jason Statham, Michael Jordan etc etc

I think all of these men look no older than their true age and often younger.

[Havok]

For some men baldness = depression. Depression = comfort eating, little exercise, lack of grooming, lack of confidence.
The result - a bald, overweight man, unhealthy looking skin, poor hygiene and poor posture. A man who looks older than his years because of all these factors.
If you can manage to remain confident and exercise well you break the vicious cycle.
eg. Andre Agassi, Jason Statham, Michael Jordan etc etc

I think all of these men look no older than their true age and often younger.

yeah, for some men, sure. the thing is you can insert any number of vocab in place of the word bald like unemployed, divorced, ugly, pimple face yada yada yada. you mention those famous people who look great bald but there are hundreds of thousands of bald men that are extremely talented and gifted yet they fail to live up to their potential because hair loss can destroy your appearance whether you're toned, tanned, ripped, tall, well dressed, great hygiene WHATEVER. sure you can say well they probably weren't good looking to begin with. the truth is, one can go from above average to average after hair loss like jason statham, but that's not the case for all men and i would go as far as to say that simply isn't true for most men.

it's not enough to break the 'vicious cycle.' baldness = depression = fat stinky slob? that means you weren't a fat stinky slob prior to hair loss. if hair loss affected you enough to make you go into real depression then i doubt working out and having amazing abs would bring back your confidence. however, i do believe there are guys like jason statham who can pull off a decent bald look and it's those men who will receive appreciable benefit from working out, living healthy lifestyle etc because 'they probably aren't ugly without hair to begin with.'

i'm happy that you're one of the minority who can pull off a decent bald head but sadly not all of us are jason statham or bruce willis.

all these motivational, encouraging, inspiring, feel-good hair loss stories have their place sure. it's usually applicable to those who go from 8 to 6 (on a scale from 1 to 10 with 10 being the best) after hair loss but not for those who will go from 8 to 3 (and yes hair is that important/crucial to appearance for some).

[VictimOfDHT]

And one thing the guy seemed to have forgotten, these guys are multi millionaires who can have the world under their feet. They live comfortable lives and that can make them look younger. With the kind of money they're making they dont really need to worry about confidence. Money usually can give you all the confidence you want . So yeah, what applies to these guys does NOT apply to every one, and like I said else where, you can't expect all of us to react the same way to whatever problem we're having. Some people don't give a rat's ass about losing their hairs. Some DO, big time. I don't know why people just don't want to come to that realization.

[jooder]

The reason i gave examples of celebrities is because people are likely to know them. It would be a little bit pointless saying 'my mate Dave looks great bald' as you wouldnt know him : )
At the end of the day, if your not happy - do something about it.
Hair transplants can offer decent looking hair.....and plastic surgery is available to alter your looks. We only have one life.

[Mr. 4000]

I say go get laid first, that will take care of being a virgin, and then go for the HT, if you feel like it and have the money.

No Strip surgery, only go FUE

[VictimOfDHT]

I say go get laid first, that will take care of being a virgin, and then go for the HT, if you feel like it and have the money.

No Strip surgery, only go FUE

To many of us losing hair means low self confidence, which means you won't have much success getting laid, or actually your interest in getting laid will decrease because I do believe your confidence can have an effect on your sex drive. Feeling good about yourself (and your looks) can do wonders on you (psychologically).


I do think FUE is the way to go if you don't want scars or any other negative effects that are associated with FUT but I keep hearing/reading that the survival rates of the hairs with FUE is much lower. I've actually been told that by a doctor. So I don't know.

[PatientlyWaiting]

To many of us losing hair means low self confidence, which means you won't have much success getting laid, or actually your interest in getting laid will decrease because I do believe your confidence can have an effect on your sex drive. Feeling good about yourself (and your looks) can do wonders on you (psychologically).


I do think FUE is the way to go if you don't want scars or any other negative effects that are associated with FUT but I keep hearing/reading that the survival rates of the hairs with FUE is much lower. I've actually been told that by a doctor. So I don't know.

Don't you just wish the magical Histogen injections were already here? You know the one that you get one injection and can see regrowth even after a year. Hopefully, 10 years from now[at most] I will be looking back at this website with a full head of hair. Well then, there wouldn't be any reason for me to be on this website at 4AM, i'd be sleeping like 32 year old baby, with hair

Makes me happy just thinking positive. At least for a few seconds before I go back to staring at my head in the mirror, wondering when this nightmare will end.