transplant nightmare

[dgman21]

My opinion about surgery is still unsure. But its an extreme amount of money and it can possibly not give you the results you want. Nothing is for sure in life. Also its possible it could mentally drain you and make life miserable. I believe the best option is to accept who you are or take a chance with surgery with consequences that things may be better or worse. Especially after reading people's stories on here. Either they like them or can't stand them!

[geminidb8]

I had been very botched in the 1980's and 1990s from 5 doctors. My scalp was so bad It looked like a burn victim. I had a " Hairlift' From a doctor in Pennsylvania and it ruined my scalp. One patient sued this doctor and won the case because he tried to commit suicide. I can tell you that after 12 corrective surgeries that I look about 75% better. The problem with hair transplants is that no person wants an incomplete look. We always want more. Well I am feeling a lot better than ever but I am 45. As far as recommendations for you jack- Forget about scar revisions because I had 5 of them done to a strip scar and for me they were no better because of stretchback. No doctor can guarantee you will not get stretchback. Fue into the scar will help more effectively and the gains will be more positive. I am now looking into scalp tattooing but this too is scary as I do not want to have the tattoo turn blue. It has been a very life altering experience that most people do not understand. Hair transplants can help but one must not have super high expectations as they will be severely disappointed. They do not compare to a full head of hair in my opinion. The density will not be the same. That being said I am happier to have a good amount of hair on my head but the scars have been a major problem. I too wore a wig for 14 years and lost most of my youth. I must tell you it will get a bit easier as you get older but the scars ( mentally) Will always be there. Good luck to you in whatever road you choose.

[Jack21]

a true nightmare

Thank you for your comments and insight. You are quite right about expectations. It is virtually impossible for a 20 something year old guy who has just started thinning to hope for anything less than complete coverage which is NOT what an HT can provide.

It is for this reason that I believe it unethical on the part of surgeons to perform the procedure on anyone under the age of 30 or even 35. A man in his 20's is obviously desperate and will do anything to stop hair loss or get back what has already been lost. He will pay thousands of dollars for an HT and then thousands more for various hair pieces and accompanying services. Both plastic surgeons and various toupee salons prey on the desperate, knowing full well that young men will pay virtually any price to have their hair back.

They also know full well that because of the sensitivity of the issue and all the stigmas associated with hair loss and even worse - attempts to conceal hair loss - very, very few patients/clients will come forward and say "This is a racket and it is horribly unethical" let alone actually bring suit. (Nobody could ever win such a lawsuit because , of course, the patient/client has already signed an ironclad waiver which has been drafted to read as it does because they know perfectly well how much dissatisfaction there will be).

Advertising is aimed at out our insecurities. It is quite ingenious - make people feel bad about themselves and feel that they must buy product x,y, or z in order to counter the shortcoming whether its balding, yellowing teeth, or erectile dis-function.

We are all flies who have been caught in this trap because we were made to feel "less than" for losing our hair, and felt that in order to be attractive we had to take any and all steps possible.

I have spent thousands and thousands of dollars on various "solutions" to balding over the years - thousands of dollars that I could ill afford to throw away.

All in all it has truly been a nightmare.

I had been very botched in the 1980's and 1990s from 5 doctors. My scalp was so bad It looked like a burn victim. I had a " Hairlift' From a doctor in Pennsylvania and it ruined my scalp. One patient sued this doctor and won the case because he tried to commit suicide. I can tell you that after 12 corrective surgeries that I look about 75% better. The problem with hair transplants is that no person wants an incomplete look. We always want more. Well I am feeling a lot better than ever but I am 45. As far as recommendations for you jack- Forget about scar revisions because I had 5 of them done to a strip scar and for me they were no better because of stretchback. No doctor can guarantee you will not get stretchback. Fue into the scar will help more effectively and the gains will be more positive. I am now looking into scalp tattooing but this too is scary as I do not want to have the tattoo turn blue. It has been a very life altering experience that most people do not understand. Hair transplants can help but one must not have super high expectations as they will be severely disappointed. They do not compare to a full head of hair in my opinion. The density will not be the same. That being said I am happier to have a good amount of hair on my head but the scars have been a major problem. I too wore a wig for 14 years and lost most of my youth. I must tell you it will get a bit easier as you get older but the scars ( mentally) Will always be there. Good luck to you in whatever road you choose.

[Jack21]

Matt, I do get the sense that you're talking to me man to man and not as a doc's rep. I appreciate that, but I still am dead set against seeing a cosmetic surgeon for anything, ever.

Jack, I hesitated to say this because you may think that as a doctor's rep I'm going to be very pro-transplant, or worse you might think I'm trying to drum up business for my employer. But that's not how I do things.

You're understandably angry with the whole concept of cosmetic surgery, but you're also clearly unhappy with your appearance. The thing is, your best shot at improving your appearance is by going under the knife again. Your scar could probably be improved. Not to the point where it's invisible when you shave your head (even the most competently executed strip scars on virgin scalps are visible under those conditions), but improved nonetheless. And at the time when your scar is being tidied up, you could undergo another transplant to add density to your hair so that it looks good enough to grow out, which would hide the scar completely.

I know I've described this before but I'm just trying to show you that by doing this you would be improving the problem area, gaining the ability to hide the problem area, and also gaining hair on the top which is the reason you walked into a surgeon's office to begin with. Speaking just as a guy sympathetic to your problems, this sounds like the way to go.

[geminidb8]

I agree with you 100%. I did have my corrective surgery by the only doctor who does not require a legal disclaimer Dr. Woods. He is really cool and his work is the only work that improved my drastic results. I had to use beard, nape and some body hair for these corrections. No visible scarring in the donor area and the transection rates were very minimal. I would say that 98% of everything grew in. I still however can see my scalp in areas because there was so much damage. My only hope will be some sort of tattooing and I am scared of it because I do not want more problems. Even at 45 this is still somewhat of a problem but not as bad as it was in my 20s and 30's. I really do not know what to say because had I done nothing I would have never been happy being bald and the treatments available- Either medications, wigs or surgery are only a treatment not a cure. In many cases with surgery as you can testify they make things worse. I am MOSTLY happy but of course if I could have more I would. That is the main thing I can tell all candidates. You MAY always want more hair than they can deliver. An ethical surgeon will deny many patients but many for the $$$ will operate regardless. I have seen Dr. Woods turn down many patients when I was in his office. I can only hope that most ethical doctors will do the same. Remember though they have to make a living ( an unethical one at that- like a drug dealer imo) and buyer beware. Many do not care. All the best...

[Jack21]

there is no 25 year old on earth with realistic expectations

The doctor who performed my procedure did in fact do just about everything he could do to dissuade me. He discussed alternatives, made me wait a relatively long time, told me to think long and hard about it etc. The only thing more he could have done would have been to refuse me. I fell into the parameters of a candidate for HT, however, and after I pestered him long enough he gave in. Because I was able to delude myself into believing that I had reasonable expectations I was able to convince him of the same. The truth that I keep coming back to, however, is that there is not a 25 year old balding male on earth who actually has realistic expectations.

I agree with you 100%. I did have my corrective surgery by the only doctor who does not require a legal disclaimer Dr. Woods. He is really cool and his work is the only work that improved my drastic results. I had to use beard, nape and some body hair for these corrections. No visible scarring in the donor area and the transection rates were very minimal. I would say that 98% of everything grew in. I still however can see my scalp in areas because there was so much damage. My only hope will be some sort of tattooing and I am scared of it because I do not want more problems. Even at 45 this is still somewhat of a problem but not as bad as it was in my 20s and 30's. I really do not know what to say because had I done nothing I would have never been happy being bald and the treatments available- Either medications, wigs or surgery are only a treatment not a cure. In many cases with surgery as you can testify they make things worse. I am MOSTLY happy but of course if I could have more I would. That is the main thing I can tell all candidates. You MAY always want more hair than they can deliver. An ethical surgeon will deny many patients but many for the $$$ will operate regardless. I have seen Dr. Woods turn down many patients when I was in his office. I can only hope that most ethical doctors will do the same. Remember though they have to make a living ( an unethical one at that- like a drug dealer imo) and buyer beware. Many do not care. All the best...

[Jack21]

Just so that you all know: scalp tattooing, aside from any other drawbacks, is also very expensive. I did some research into masking my scar, looked into a dozen different providers and was floored by the estimates. When I say expensive I mean 6-8 thousand dollars at a "reputable" provider.

[geminidb8]

What are Realistic Expectations? I always think this is a cop out for the doctors. Are they bad expectations? Do not expect too much? Or ?? I think what they mean is we will give you some hair but nothing close to what you really would want. I would say if one can be happy with about 50% of your original density then you should consider a HT. Ever notice though Elton John or the vice president is never used as a poster child for HT's. Wonder why... John wears a wig to cover up the bad work he had decades ago. The VP can look ok in a frontal shot but terrible, terrible from the back or sides. This should be addressed to all patients or prospective patients.

[Jack21]

Have you ever studied the body language of guys on HT commercials? I always notice this one character who, as he says "This has to be one of the best decisions I've ever made", is shaking his head vigorously and looks absolutely miserable. Of course he is shot head on in and in very favorable lighting. Somehow none of this occurred to me years ago when I was so absolutely desperate. "You don't have to accept going bald" they say in the commercials. That is the very first thing we MUST do. We must accept it. I am not saying that I have accepted looking like this. I hate it, but it is who I am. I am a bald man like one quarter of the population of this earth.

What are Realistic Expectations? I always think this is a cop out for the doctors. Are they bad expectations? Do not expect too much? Or ?? I think what they mean is we will give you some hair but nothing close to what you really would want. I would say if one can be happy with about 50% of your original density then you should consider a HT. Ever notice though Elton John or the vice president is never used as a poster child for HT's. Wonder why... John wears a wig to cover up the bad work he had decades ago. The VP can look ok in a frontal shot but terrible, terrible from the back or sides. This should be addressed to all patients or prospective patients.

[geminidb8]

Very true in what you state. Lets hope some newbies learn to either accept things or accept a moderate improvement with the gamble of scars... Tough, tough choices to make. I am happy though that I am not bald because deep down I know that I would hate it. There is no simple right answer to this. What it needs is a cure.

[Jack21]

I HOPE that I've saved just one young guy from the shit that I've gone through. I hope so, but I don't think that you can talk a young man out of a hair transplant any more than you can talk a young man out of going to war. It doesn't matter what they hear from you, they'll go ahead and do it anyway.

QUOTE=geminidb8;16265]Very true in what you state. Lets hope some newbies learn to either accept things or accept a moderate improvement with the gamble of scars... Tough, tough choices to make. I am happy though that I am not bald because deep down I know that I would hate it. There is no simple right answer to this. What it needs is a cure.[/QUOTE]

[DAVE52]

Jack , I truly feel for you and hope that you can obtain some form of corrective measure so you can move on with your life and enjoy happiness

I am 52
I had one session 10 yrs ago when there was thinning in the temple areas.
I can clip the back using a # 2 with no obvious signs of a scar - thank God for that .
If my scar was as big as you say yours is I would probably never leave my house
The top gives the illusion of a somewhat full head of hair but it is not as dense as I hoped it would be , or as dense as I thought I would be comfortable with .
Yes, I was told I would need another session but it was up to me if I wanted another one .
Was told some clients only have one session and are comfortable .....I guess I am one of those that is not comoftable with what I have
I also have a big bald patch on the my crown - get teased about it at work ---grown adults teasing others about their lack of hair
I'm sure if I posted pics some would wish they had what I had but we are all different and what one person is comfortable with another is not
Like yourseld I have no desire to go back and have another session although it would probably be in my best interests to thicken it up = just don't want to go through the anxiety of cutting the back again and waiting a year for the hair to grow .
It was very good for 3, 4,5, years but the friggin balding never seems to stop - at some point I would like it to stop so I know what I have to live with

Like yourself, and many others, the last 10 yrs have been brutal hell.
I 've missed out on many things I enjoy ebacuse I am so self concious of my baldness .
I cried my ass off when I first noticed the balding
Couldn't sleep at night
Still do have trouble some nights
Went to see a shrink who gave me meds to help sleep ease my anxiety and not think about it all the time but that wasn't a cure
I avoid public situations at all costs
Every morning is hell as I have to wash my hair and apply a cream / gel so the hair will look presentable - if not , it flies all over the place.
Sometimes not enough cream and it doesn't hold; too much cream and it weighs it down and looks greasy
I try to keep it as short as possible - the guy who cuts it goes finger length on the top - I go get it cut every 2 or 3 weeks - sometimes he tells me I don't have enough to cut as it's not long enough


I see you had your hair very short when you were in the army
I wish 10 yrs ago I had the courage to at least try a brush cut and then hopefully I would be able to live with it .
Now I am too chicken to cut the top with a # 2 or # 3 clipper , as I am afraid I'll look likew a friggen porcupine on acid or something


Anyways just wanted to wish you the best .

I always thought I was the only one who had this problem .

I am NOT happy to see that others worry about it like I do

Good Luck !!

[Mr. 4000]

I do not want to name the surgeon for the following reasons:

He did virtually everything he could to talk me out of the procedure. Only after he was positive that I understood what to reasonably expect did he perform it. He made me wait months, discussed alternatives such as my just cropping all my hair short, and essentially tried to make me go away. I convinced him that I fully understood that the procedure would not provide me with a full head of hair and that I understood that my own naturally growing hair would continue to thin. Finally about 6 months after I first saw him did he perform the procedure. He could have done nothing more other than refusing to perform the procedure. This is called an "elective procedure" for a reason, however. I elected to have it done and I had covinced the doctor that my expectations were realistic. The fault is mine. I was young, desperate, and although I convinced both the doctor and myself that my expectations for the procedure were realistic, they were not.

Jack I feel your pain my friend

My doctor didn't educate me at all on other possibilities. He didn't suggest anything but wanted the cash IMO. He did a poor job across the board with my hairline setting high than my existing hairline, weak density, and screwed up something in my neck that caused a muscle to atrophy. The depression is 5-6 inches and runs into my trap muscle.

He showed up late, and I had to wait for him to get there. I was told never to have anything done on a Monday, and now I know why.

Never get a procedure done on a Monday, these docs are drunk all weekend, traveling, trying to get their chit together and come in to work not ready and focused. Weekend rust, don't do it. Let someone else book those days.

I wish I knew better

My hair is thinner over all, the angle of the graft are unmanageable. He stretched my scalp so much I feel tightness everyday, and only called me recently because I I created a blog which he read and doesn't want to lose business.

Jack fix the scar and cut it short and move on with life, and have fun. Don't spend the rest of your life worrying about hair, you will only stress and kill yourself. Most people are average looking so who cares!

For me, I will probably try one more time to get a better result, but it will be hard to go back, I have the same fear after what my doctor did. I can't believe how bad many things went wrong. This is a doctor that most vets know too. I totally gun shy at this point.

[Jack21]

something is fundamentally wrong

You all do realize that we are all pathologically obsessed, dont you? We did not become obsessed in a vacuum. We are products of a society that has elected one bald president since the advent of the newsreal 100 years ago. That president had disproven the myth of the weak or feeble bald man as he was General Dwight David Eisenhower. It would appear that one has to win a World War to prove that he is a man if he has lost his hair. The very existence of this web site, of this forum, of the very procedure of hair transplantation is testament to the youth obsessed, self hating society we live in. I fought for this country. I certainly did not expect to be welcomed back by jeers and stares of horror. I am talking about something fundamentally wrong with us. I should be happy to be home safe and sound with all my fingers and toes. Instead I am made to feel like sh#t everyday by the very people I gave so many of my years of my life to protect. Our obsession with appearances has become not just sick but dangerous.

Jack I feel your pain my friend

My doctor didn't educate me at all on other possibilities. He didn't suggest anything but wanted the cash IMO. He did a poor job across the board with my hairline setting high than my existing hairline, weak density, and screwed up something in my neck that caused a muscle to atrophy. The depression is 5-6 inches and runs into my trap muscle.

He showed up late, and I had to wait for him to get there. I was told never to have anything done on a Monday, and now I know why.

Never get a procedure done on a Monday, these docs are drunk all weekend, traveling, trying to get their chit together and come in to work not ready and focused. Weekend rust, don't do it. Let someone else book those days.

I wish I knew better

My hair is thinner over all, the angle of the graft are unmanageable. He stretched my scalp so much I feel tightness everyday, and only called me recently because I I created a blog which he read and doesn't want to lose business.

Jack fix the scar and cut it short and move on with life, and have fun. Don't spend the rest of your life worrying about hair, you will only stress and kill yourself. Most people are average looking so who cares!

For me, I will probably try one more time to get a better result, but it will be hard to go back, I have the same fear after what my doctor did. I can't believe how bad many things went wrong. This is a doctor that most vets know too. I totally gun shy at this point.

[gmonasco]

We are products of a society that has elected one bald president since the advent of the newsreal 100 years ago.

We're also products of a society that hasn't elected a president with facial hair in over a century. Clearly, then, our society is obsessed with the clean-shaven look and loathes facial hair, and no man with any form of beard or moustache has any reasonable chance of achieving success.