hello..just wanted to get somethings off my chest

[ughugh]

First I wanna thank you guys for reading...excuse me if this comes off as whiney and complaining but I really need people to talk to..

I'm 30 years old..and my baldness has taking over my life in such a negative aspect.

I'm black and have been balding since high school (16) ive now been shaving it clean for over 5 years and have the Michael Jordan look.

I grew up in a family with lots of bald uncles and I thought they looked very good with the look. Ironically I use to tease them when I was younger not knowing I would soon be heading down that path.

Long story short...balding is ruining my life. Ive worn a hat EVERYWHERE I go since college.only my mom and sister have seen me without a hat on in my whole family in 14 years. Was even lucky enough to get to wear my hat at my first job. But just last year I got a new job and I had to dress professionally and off the hat came. What followed was bad anxiety attacks and bouts of depressions that I'm now on medication for all because my insecurities and uncomfort level with my balding makes it a reoccurring nightmare every day I wake up. I constantly feel people are starring and laughing at me. I've even contemplated quitting because I'm so uncomfortable. I've turned down weddings and anything that deals with me taking my hat off...even now my best friend of 20 years thinks I'm gonna be in his wedding next year and I probably won't do it. I've turned down sporting games..and won't even take my hat off during national anthems at games. It's bad. And I'm not proud of it...I know people will say I have to man up and I agree...but I can't help the way I feel.

Luckily I have a beautiful family..wife and kids..and courting females isn't a necessity anymore. My wife is being very supportive and knows that this is taking over my life...

I just don't know what to do anymore..I've thought of SMP but I can't go to work one day bald and the next day with a tattooed hairline...I'd get laughed at more then I do now..I would love to have the procedure before starting a new job that way maybe they wouldn't know..

Anyway...any thoughts are helpful..any advice on what you did to help cope..cause right now I'm not.

[Buster]

Hey, I know it sucks. I've avoided social events as well because of my hair, so I know how you feel.

I just don't know what to do anymore..I've thought of SMP but I can't go to work one day bald and the next day with a tattooed hairline...I'd get laughed at more then I do now..I would love to have the procedure before starting a new job that way maybe they wouldn't know..

You said that you shave your head clean, would it be noticeable if you had SMP while on a vacation? A lot of guys shave their heads clean and decide to grow it in. Or is it obvious in terms of being able to see where your hair line is?

The bottom line is, you need to be happy. If hair loss is ruining your life and you think that SMP can make you feel better, you should find a way to get the procedure done. Otherwise, maybe you should try to find another job so you don't have to worry about the anxiety of it all. So you can start fresh.

You only live once, and you don't want to be spending most of your life hating every day that you have to get out of bed.

Good luck, Buddy.

[Jedgreen]

I know you know it already but: people are not laughing at you because you're bald. Only a handful of idiots can react like that. 99% of people do not care, because to them it is not their problem. You're just another guy who shave his head like millions. I'm 39 and I completely shave my head for more than 10 years and I'm pleased with my look but I can fully understand someone who don't like the look of it. One thing is sure to me though: it should stay a personnal problem between you and you. It is already difficult enough to win a battle against yourself, don't try to guess too much what other people think about your look. The LARGE majority of them don't care. If you shave your head clean then you have a clean look, period. You don't have a silly Krusty the clown look. No one is laughing at you. Plus on a black guy it looks even better (you don't have that egg look that I have, ya know!). If having a SMP really is your goal, then I'd say why not, but do it for yourself, not because you think people are laughing. They are not.

[ughugh]

Hey, I know it sucks. I've avoided social events as well because of my hair, so I know how you feel.



You said that you shave your head clean, would it be noticeable if you had SMP while on a vacation? A lot of guys shave their heads clean and decide to grow it in. Or is it obvious in terms of being able to see where your hair line is?

The bottom line is, you need to be happy. If hair loss is ruining your life and you think that SMP can make you feel better, you should find a way to get the procedure done. Otherwise, maybe you should try to find another job so you don't have to worry about the anxiety of it all. So you can start fresh.

You only live once, and you don't want to be spending most of your life hating every day that you have to get out of bed.

Good luck, Buddy.

Thanks for the response... Just being able to read that someone else goes through maybe even a little of what I go through..helps me out a little.

As far as the SMP...I have a pretty visible norwood 5-6 and don't think I'd fool anyone that has seen me without my hat on..therefore id have to wait to get it in between jobs...and getting a new job isn't exactly automatic.

I'm really at a loss for my next options...as I feel like men in our situation don't have many at all.

[ughugh]

I know you know it already but: people are not laughing at you because you're bald. Only a handful of idiots can react like that. 99% of people do not care, because to them it is not their problem. You're just another guy who shave his head like millions. I'm 39 and I completely shave my head for more than 10 years and I'm pleased with my look but I can fully understand someone who don't like the look of it. One thing is sure to me though: it should stay a personnal problem between you and you. It is already difficult enough to win a battle against yourself, don't try to guess too much what other people think about your look. The LARGE majority of them don't care. If you shave your head clean then you have a clean look, period. You don't have a silly Krusty the clown look. No one is laughing at you. Plus on a black guy it looks even better (you don't have that egg look that I have, ya know!). If having a SMP really is your goal, then I'd say why not, but do it for yourself, not because you think people are laughing. They are not.

Thanks a lot for your insight...everything you said is 100% right...but I'm so uncomfortable with the look that in my mind I'm some hideous freak...

[richie6245]

Hi there new on here know exactly what you mean I have hated my hair for 25 years and finally had a Ht yesterday had an u shaved procedure but have a huge square shaved out of back of head personally I think you should have that SMP? done it only looks like a couple of weeks growth do it!!!

[lacazette]

Hey man,
I really think SMP will help you. I've seen countless results especially on black men and it's look great. That would frame you face, it could help you to live with more peace in your mind, as for the moment you're suffering.
Maybe you could try the temporary ink (1, 2 years)
Don't plan to go too dark on the pigment, or with a too aggressive low hairline. The most realistic results Ive seen is with just a light shadow and brokens hairlines.

Do you have a nice donor zone? which Norwood are you? do you have lot of body hairs?
cause a combination smp/fue may work in your case, do researchs on that thing

[Jedgreen]

Yeah, temporary SMP. I would never advice someone to permanently tatoo his head. The goal with your look in general is to have the choice. So temporary would be the way to go.

[ughugh]

Thanks guys ...smp is definitely my number 1 option right now....and I actually had no idea there was temporary ink until you guys just told me..

I live in the NY area and was looking at I believe Headstrong clinic...has anyone heard anything on them?

Maybe you guys can help but it always seems that there isn't many African American males with HT....is that still due to the fact that it's hard to duplicate the nature of black hair?

Also a couple other perceived negatives I have with my head is 1. A pretty large forehead and 2. My scalp gets really oily. I carry around oil wipes and sometimes a wet rag as well . I hate the shiny oily greasy feel my head starts to get not even 20 mins after wiping it. Having SMP and a oily scalp doesn't go imo..

[jamesst11]

I do believe, the more you cleanse your scalp, the more oil it will produce. I started washing my hair every day last summer, when I went one day without it, it became very oily... When I switched to washing it every other day, the production of sebum was drastically reduced. I have seen some good hair transplant results on African American males... it simply depends who your HT doc is. some have way more experience than others when it comes to this.