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Hi Guys,
Never been on a forum before so please bear with me! Ive joined to openly discuss my experience with you all so that hopefully someone can relate to where I have been and help with advice, and also if I can help anyone to see they're not the only ones like this, I hope I can help you!
Unfortunately I have found this part of my life a massive struggle, and one that I have let gain far too much control. I'm now 29 but have been attempting to come to terms with my inevitable balding since about 22. I have been incredibly lucky to have a girlfriend (now fiancée) who I have been able to be completely open with through this period, and who has supported me through it all. Without someone on my side knowing what I was dealing with, I think this would be a losing battle for me, especially psychologically.
I have always thought of myself as 'one of the lads' who would play sports, go on holiday, go out for drinks and not care what anyone thought. Things changed quite dramatically when I was about 23 and I became obsessed with my hair loss and with this obsession I fell into a very difficult period of depression and I began to seclude myself from people, with elaborate reasons for not being able to go out/away etc. and also stopped playing sports or socialising much at all. This remains the lowest point of my life, where I let it get to the point where I would be repulsed by what was in the mirror, woke up in tears most days and began dying my hair (I am naturally light brown/blonde) a very dark and almost black colour to try and help give the illusion of thicker hair. I will go on record and say, this definitely does NOT work, so please don't try it!
I went through this period for a year or so until I came to the decision to shave my hair and keep it short, which I have ever since. Most people's stories probably end here and they eventually come to terms with things, but for me, although shaving my hair worked to relieve some pressures, I found more in a certain product called 'Toppik'. It was perfect, I could sprinkle it on, and my hairline would be better! I can make my hairline what I want, and control it.
Though most people would tell me I'm nuts for using Toppik on a shaved head, I'm lucky that my profession is a designer, and have always had a keen eye for blending tones, so I could use this to create a staggered hairline that looks pretty realistic. Again I'm also lucky in that my fiancée looks at it every time I do it from every angle and says if it's ok or if it looks bad.
I eventually came to use a kit of a few tools that work for me which I can apply the Toppik, blend it, fix it, and keep it looking as natural as possible. I've become a bit of a pro at it, which again, sounds really good.
Unfortunately, 5 years has passed now of doing this, and although Toppik sounds great initially and has helped me with keeping my life moving, the constant worry if you're going to be caught out, if it looks bad, if it rains, if the light is funny...is a tiring and vicious circle and all the while you're your hair loss does continue underneath, and it gets thinner and harder to make look natural. I have pushed on with my career and see my friends more than I gave for a long time, which took some time after become so removed from everyone.
I currently have less hair than ever (almost none at the front and very thin at the back) I buzz my hair really short, shorter than ever (I use a digital trimmer set at 6.5mm) but it's becoming noticeably harder to manage for me, so I think the time is coming that I'm just going to have to accept it. In some ways, I'm looking forward to the relief of being able to be me, but I'm in a difficult situation where if I just stop, my work colleagues and friends will be incredibly shocked and I feel as though I could be ridiculed. I look practically fully bald at the front and crown without Toppik and it's not possible to pass it off as a natural hair loss if I just stopped.
So, I'm asking for advice really, how should I handle this last bit? Can anyone relate in any way?
And my advice to anyone reading this thinking about hair loss and how to manage it, I would say:
Talk to someone if you can, it helps so much to have someone who knows and is on your side.
Try not to let it take over and become obsessed by it, or at least keep trying to push your life forward as this will help you to keep the real things in perspective. It isn't the end of the world really (even though it feels it) and it will only stop you doing the things you want if you let it. Again, talking to people will help to relieve the pressure you put on yourself.
If you want to use medicine/Toppik really consider it fully, as although it can be a good quick-fix it can cause some difficult and paranoid emotions if you just try to cover it up and hair loss doesn't stop by just covering it.
I hope this helps if someone is struggling like I did/am.
Thanks,
Never been on a forum before so please bear with me! Ive joined to openly discuss my experience with you all so that hopefully someone can relate to where I have been and help with advice, and also if I can help anyone to see they're not the only ones like this, I hope I can help you!
Unfortunately I have found this part of my life a massive struggle, and one that I have let gain far too much control. I'm now 29 but have been attempting to come to terms with my inevitable balding since about 22. I have been incredibly lucky to have a girlfriend (now fiancée) who I have been able to be completely open with through this period, and who has supported me through it all. Without someone on my side knowing what I was dealing with, I think this would be a losing battle for me, especially psychologically.
I have always thought of myself as 'one of the lads' who would play sports, go on holiday, go out for drinks and not care what anyone thought. Things changed quite dramatically when I was about 23 and I became obsessed with my hair loss and with this obsession I fell into a very difficult period of depression and I began to seclude myself from people, with elaborate reasons for not being able to go out/away etc. and also stopped playing sports or socialising much at all. This remains the lowest point of my life, where I let it get to the point where I would be repulsed by what was in the mirror, woke up in tears most days and began dying my hair (I am naturally light brown/blonde) a very dark and almost black colour to try and help give the illusion of thicker hair. I will go on record and say, this definitely does NOT work, so please don't try it!
I went through this period for a year or so until I came to the decision to shave my hair and keep it short, which I have ever since. Most people's stories probably end here and they eventually come to terms with things, but for me, although shaving my hair worked to relieve some pressures, I found more in a certain product called 'Toppik'. It was perfect, I could sprinkle it on, and my hairline would be better! I can make my hairline what I want, and control it.
Though most people would tell me I'm nuts for using Toppik on a shaved head, I'm lucky that my profession is a designer, and have always had a keen eye for blending tones, so I could use this to create a staggered hairline that looks pretty realistic. Again I'm also lucky in that my fiancée looks at it every time I do it from every angle and says if it's ok or if it looks bad.
I eventually came to use a kit of a few tools that work for me which I can apply the Toppik, blend it, fix it, and keep it looking as natural as possible. I've become a bit of a pro at it, which again, sounds really good.
Unfortunately, 5 years has passed now of doing this, and although Toppik sounds great initially and has helped me with keeping my life moving, the constant worry if you're going to be caught out, if it looks bad, if it rains, if the light is funny...is a tiring and vicious circle and all the while you're your hair loss does continue underneath, and it gets thinner and harder to make look natural. I have pushed on with my career and see my friends more than I gave for a long time, which took some time after become so removed from everyone.
I currently have less hair than ever (almost none at the front and very thin at the back) I buzz my hair really short, shorter than ever (I use a digital trimmer set at 6.5mm) but it's becoming noticeably harder to manage for me, so I think the time is coming that I'm just going to have to accept it. In some ways, I'm looking forward to the relief of being able to be me, but I'm in a difficult situation where if I just stop, my work colleagues and friends will be incredibly shocked and I feel as though I could be ridiculed. I look practically fully bald at the front and crown without Toppik and it's not possible to pass it off as a natural hair loss if I just stopped.
So, I'm asking for advice really, how should I handle this last bit? Can anyone relate in any way?
And my advice to anyone reading this thinking about hair loss and how to manage it, I would say:
Talk to someone if you can, it helps so much to have someone who knows and is on your side.
Try not to let it take over and become obsessed by it, or at least keep trying to push your life forward as this will help you to keep the real things in perspective. It isn't the end of the world really (even though it feels it) and it will only stop you doing the things you want if you let it. Again, talking to people will help to relieve the pressure you put on yourself.
If you want to use medicine/Toppik really consider it fully, as although it can be a good quick-fix it can cause some difficult and paranoid emotions if you just try to cover it up and hair loss doesn't stop by just covering it.
I hope this helps if someone is struggling like I did/am.
Thanks,
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