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  1. #1
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    Default Thoughts on Hair Loss

    I actually posted this in the Replicel topic section since the topic of hair transplantation was discussed and I voiced my thoughts about it. But a lot of what I wrote has to do with dealing with hair loss in everyday life so I thought would copy and paste it over here.

    I couldn't agree with you more, clandestine. And the fact that doctors still consider strip hair transplantation the gold standard of hair restoration is just downright sad, and really goes to show that we need much better options to fight hair loss. It's no wonder that the statistics show that less than 10% of people suffering from hair loss seek treatment, and even less opt for hair transplantation. One of the main issues that I have with hair transplantation is the permanent head scarring. Although people will say that the scarring is covered up the native hair, "a scar is still a scar" and that scar will be with a person for the rest of their life. I was talking to my friend late last night (waiting to sober up so I could drive home, haha) for almost 3 hours and a lot of what we talked about was how people change and how things that are important to a person now, may not be important to a person 5 or 10 years from now. He was a long-haired rocker when he was my age, but as he grew older, he couldn't care less about having a bouffant of hair and fitting in with the rock n roll lifestyle. So that made me think that maybe there will be a day when I will just be content shaving my long hair, looking like a big bad-ass (I've always been a big guy), and will not worry about constantly taking Propecia (which is causing me side effects). But if I ever got a hair transplant, those thoughts would be ruined since I would need to worry about covering up a scar on the back of my head for the rest of my life. Poor Clandestine, you posted one simple and accurate comment, and I respond by "talking your ear off" with my long-winded dissertation! Haha....
    One last thing, I was actually at the club last night and I saw a couple of guys sitting at a table not far from me. They had shaved heads yet they still had girlfriends and looked very good. One of them actually looked like one of my favorite UFC fighters so I actually went up to him and said "dude, I'm not gay or anything and I love women (haha) but would you mind if I took a photo of you with my cell phone since you look just like one of my favorite UFC fighters". Haha, he and his friends got a good laugh out of it and I took the pic. So I texted that photo to my friends with the caption "the clone of Shane Carwin". But I had another reason for taking that photo. I thought to myself: here is a normal guy (not famous like Jason Statham) with a shaved head who still is in the company of an attractive women and is very confident about himself. That photo will serve as a reminder to me that if there comes a time where I actually do shave my head, I will know that I can still get women and still be confident, just like this guy was last night.
    Wow, did I get off on a tangent or what!!

  2. #2
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    DepressedByHairLoss, I really like the way you are beginning to think. Its definitely the right attitude. Hairloss is not the end of the world, and you really don't want to look back 30yrs down thinking, I didn't do all that because of my hairloss. I am kind of envying you right now. You are on the right way forward.

    But I guess it is a lot easier said than done. Atleast in my case, I am many yrs behind in life, than had I not made mistakes, and maybe some things would have been different. Hairloss kind of makes me weary of that, like a realization so much time has passed and I am in my late 20s already, having missed out on a lot over these years. The time I wasted on b.s could have used productively and I would be in a different place now. The looking attractive to the opposite sex is about 40 percent, the rest is 60. I really hate that about hairloss, that it stings on several different levels.

    But the worse is the ridicule for actually caring about this stuff. The last I spoke to my sister a few months back, she told me I was acting like a 10yr old girl just cause I am worrying about my hair so much. That really hurt. And specially coming from someone who is an MD at a hospital in the South, just makes you wonder..lol..But that kind of ridicule for caring about hairloss really stings man!! I think we've all experienced it sometime in our life. It makes my blood boil that women can paint their face, get implants, botox injections, and yet we can't complain/care about our hair.

  3. #3
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    That was in no way a too long-winded dissertation, DBHL. Always appreciate your posts, mate. I'm in agreeance with khan, good to see you're trying to adopt a more positive attitude about hair loss; we should all strive to do so (and in most regards).

    And great contribution, I was getting sick of that Scorpion cat posting negativity all throughout the forums. This is a good change.

  4. #4
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    Hey guys, thanks so much for the comments. Khan and Clandestine, you both really seem like good guys. Don't get me wrong though, my hair loss bothers me all time, mainly because of the scene that I'm into. As I've said in previous posts, I've been into big-haired rock/metal for a long time now, and having a full head of long hair is integral to me when I hang out in that scene and when I used to play in bar bands for a while. I see these guys playing in other bar bands with huge, full heads of hair and it's really hard not to get jealous of that. If I wasn't a rock n roll guy, then I don't think hair loss would have hit me nearly this hard. There are guys at my gym and guys that I used to box with who have shaved heads and really don't seem to care about hair loss, and perhaps that's because "hair" isn't so valued in the places that they hang out at. One of those guys was big into rap/hip hop and in that scene there are lots of guys with shaved heads. LL Cool J is a perfect example, and I really respect him. I think he started losing his hair very early on but he always carried himself with confidence and he's gotten more women than just about anybody.
    What really got me thinking were the comments you made about strip transplants, Clandestine. In the end, I would much rather just shave my head than go down the hair transplant route and worry about an ear-to-ear scar on my head for the rest of my life. And then there's the lifelong commitment to needing multiple transplants to achieve decent results and the lifelong commitment to taking Propecia. And even then, you still wouldn't get close to a full head of hair. It's just not worth it to me. I mean, if hair surgery could give a person back a full head of hair, then I would probably do it, but I'm not gonna scar my head for life just for the illusion of some semblance of hair.
    But yeah, when I saw those guys (one of whom looked like that UFC fighter), I said to myself that if I ever did shave my head, I would want to carry myself like those guys. They were confident, with women, and carried themselves like real men. And nobody seemed to give a shit at all about their shaved heads. And that's partially why I took that photo like I said I did; to remind myself that even if I did shave my head, that I could still look good, get women, and kick ass too. I'm not sure I believe that yet, but I'm working on it and I'm trying. And that's actually another thing that I wonder about: some people tell me that perhaps my long hair is what's turning some women off. Maybe having a shaved head would be better than having a long, shaggy head of hair? Maybe more regular women (as opposed to rocker chicks) would be attracted to me with a shaved head rather than long hair?
    Khan, you bring up very good points in your last paragraph. The hypocrisy in society is oftentimes staggering and very unjust. Women will freak out if their hair goes gray and will dye their hair to cover it up. They'll spend ridiculous amounts of money on various plastic surgeries to enhance their natural appearances. When we get depressed about hair loss, we're not asking for anything unnatural or artificial to be implanted into ourselves or put on our faces. We're just asking for something that we were born with and that we used to have.
    Anyway, I'm rambling again but this section "Coping With Hair Loss" is really a great addition because we can all anonymously share our stories, empathize with each other's situations, offer support, and attempt to help each other out. And Khan and Clandestine, thanks for the comments; you guys seem like very cool dudes. And if you don't mind my asking, where are you guys from? I'm from the northeastern United States. Clandestine, I think you may have mentioned that you're from England, and Khan, your posts indicate you may be from the southeastern U.S.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by DepressedByHairLoss View Post

    In the end, I would much rather just shave my head than go down the hair transplant route and worry about an ear-to-ear scar on my head for the rest of my life. And then there's the lifelong commitment to needing multiple transplants to achieve decent results and the lifelong commitment to taking Propecia. And even then, you still wouldn't get close to a full head of hair. It's just not worth it to me. I mean, if hair surgery could give a person back a full head of hair, then I would probably do it, but I'm not gonna scar my head for life just for the illusion of some semblance of hair.
    But yeah, when I saw those guys (one of whom looked like that UFC fighter), I said to myself that if I ever did shave my head, I would want to carry myself like those guys. They were confident, with women, and carried themselves like real men. And nobody seemed to give a shit at all about their shaved heads. And that's partially why I took that photo like I said I did; to remind myself that even if I did shave my head, that I could still look good, get women, and kick ass too. I'm not sure I believe that yet, but I'm working on it and I'm trying. .
    This part says it all

    CONFIDEnce in yourself

    I asked a fellow at work how he got the courage to shave / buzz his head and he said you just do it , because no one else gives a shit, so why should you.

    For the first while people may comment on it but then when they get used to you with buzzed head the comments will stop

    People who have never seen you before with a buzzed head wont think a thing about it becuase there are millions of people in the world who not sport the buzzed / shaved look

    Here's long haired rocker who shaved his head

    http://www.slybaldguys.com/smf/index.php?topic=16728.0

    We just need confidence in ours selves

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by DepressedByHairLoss View Post
    Khan, your posts indicate you may be from the southeastern U.S.
    Thats my sis, I am in Ontario.

    DAVE52, there are several different dimensions that hairloss can effect someone. Looking good to others is just one aspect. As I mentioned earlier in my case, and I think for other people too, it is a little deeper than looking good.
    Yes, having confidence will help, but the hardest part is the embracing bit. For me it brings about several different kind of lows.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by DepressedByHairLoss View Post
    Hey guys, thanks so much for the comments. Khan and Clandestine, you both really seem like good guys. Don't get me wrong though, my hair loss bothers me all time, mainly because of the scene that I'm into. As I've said in previous posts, I've been into big-haired rock/metal for a long time now, and having a full head of long hair is integral to me when I hang out in that scene and when I used to play in bar bands for a while. I see these guys playing in other bar bands with huge, full heads of hair and it's really hard not to get jealous of that. If I wasn't a rock n roll guy, then I don't think hair loss would have hit me nearly this hard. There are guys at my gym and guys that I used to box with who have shaved heads and really don't seem to care about hair loss, and perhaps that's because "hair" isn't so valued in the places that they hang out at. One of those guys was big into rap/hip hop and in that scene there are lots of guys with shaved heads. LL Cool J is a perfect example, and I really respect him. I think he started losing his hair very early on but he always carried himself with confidence and he's gotten more women than just about anybody.
    What really got me thinking were the comments you made about strip transplants, Clandestine. In the end, I would much rather just shave my head than go down the hair transplant route and worry about an ear-to-ear scar on my head for the rest of my life. And then there's the lifelong commitment to needing multiple transplants to achieve decent results and the lifelong commitment to taking Propecia. And even then, you still wouldn't get close to a full head of hair. It's just not worth it to me. I mean, if hair surgery could give a person back a full head of hair, then I would probably do it, but I'm not gonna scar my head for life just for the illusion of some semblance of hair.
    But yeah, when I saw those guys (one of whom looked like that UFC fighter), I said to myself that if I ever did shave my head, I would want to carry myself like those guys. They were confident, with women, and carried themselves like real men. And nobody seemed to give a shit at all about their shaved heads. And that's partially why I took that photo like I said I did; to remind myself that even if I did shave my head, that I could still look good, get women, and kick ass too. I'm not sure I believe that yet, but I'm working on it and I'm trying. And that's actually another thing that I wonder about: some people tell me that perhaps my long hair is what's turning some women off. Maybe having a shaved head would be better than having a long, shaggy head of hair? Maybe more regular women (as opposed to rocker chicks) would be attracted to me with a shaved head rather than long hair?
    Khan, you bring up very good points in your last paragraph. The hypocrisy in society is oftentimes staggering and very unjust. Women will freak out if their hair goes gray and will dye their hair to cover it up. They'll spend ridiculous amounts of money on various plastic surgeries to enhance their natural appearances. When we get depressed about hair loss, we're not asking for anything unnatural or artificial to be implanted into ourselves or put on our faces. We're just asking for something that we were born with and that we used to have.
    Anyway, I'm rambling again but this section "Coping With Hair Loss" is really a great addition because we can all anonymously share our stories, empathize with each other's situations, offer support, and attempt to help each other out. And Khan and Clandestine, thanks for the comments; you guys seem like very cool dudes. And if you don't mind my asking, where are you guys from? I'm from the northeastern United States. Clandestine, I think you may have mentioned that you're from England, and Khan, your posts indicate you may be from the southeastern U.S.
    Hey DBHL,

    It's not just because you're in the rock scene. I, myself, am in no particular scene and hair loss has affected me tremendously. If you weren't a musician, you would be in another industry that would slightly judge you based on the density of your scalp. It's tough, man. Hair is the main decoration one has. Without it, we cease to be the person we once were. Some guys are strong enough to get past a thinning head of hair, but I bet that even the most adamant male/female still wishes they had a full head of hair.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I agree that the current paradigm is not acceptable. We don't want to butcher our heads. Like you said, if we were guaranteed a full head of hair with an HT, I'd be the first in line. But the fact is that our donor mathematically does not contain even 50% of the hair necessary to get full density. People who rush into getting an HT don't realize that their hair is going to continue to fall out to the point where a second procedure is necessary. After the second you'll need a third and so on. There will be a point when you won't have any donor left to continue the above process. Once that happens, you'll have to deal with a comb over for the rest of your life because shaving your head is no longer an option (due to all the scarring).

    I've been a member of this site for 2 years now. Every month there are signs of progress in the science of hair loss but nothing seems to develop to a usable point. I know patience is key, but when you're 30 years old and see your youth slipping, it begins to weigh mentally. I recently saw some results from Gho's technique which looked impressive, but then valid points are brought up on how he might have manipulated the results.

    I've had a fantastic wife/girlfriend for the last 11 years. One would think that hair loss shouldn't bother me since I'm in a relationship. But nothing could be further from the truth. I've thought of shaving my head but frankly I think I look way better with hair, even if it's half of what I use to have. Maybe I'll thin to the point where I''l have to shave my head. till then, I'll keep sculpting (I say this because I feel like I've been forced to become an artist, in order to hide some of the thinning, lol) my hair every day before I leave the house.

    I really hope that one day we will be able to look back on our posts and laugh because hair loss is a thing of the past. Till then, keep your heads up!

  8. #8
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    Hey Dave52, thanks so much for that link. That rocker on there who shaved his head reminds me a lot of myself minus the tattoos. He actually really looks good with the shaved head; if I was convinced that I could look like that with a shaved head, then maybe I'd have done so already. I wish that dude had an e-mail address cus then I'd contact him because he reminds me a lot of myself.
    Level, you make some very interesting comments. With regards to the 2nd and 3rd paragraphs, the lack of innovation when it comes to hair loss really frustrates me. It seems like there are two camps: 1. the scientists who make hair loss discoveries on mice but never test their discoveries on humans and 2. the doctors who will perform hair transplants and not even look into performing any other hair loss treatments. I've brought this up before and people debated the hell out of me for it.
    Level, I really think the fact that you have a wife who you love really makes all the difference in the world. A lot of us (including myself) are worried that because of our hair loss we will not be able to attract the women that we want.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by DepressedByHairLoss View Post
    Level, I really think the fact that you have a wife who you love really makes all the difference in the world. A lot of us (including myself) are worried that because of our hair loss we will not be able to attract the women that we want.
    Hey DBHL. I am glad you are finally getting out of the pit called depression.
    Now hairloss bothers me too. And it will probably never stop bothering you. I believe of all the men that are balding a really small percentage is not bothered by it.
    However despite that there are a lot of guys who accept it and continue to live on. That is life you know. If you stay deppressed all the time you can't be happy. You can't live life. That is why it is best to fight depression.

    However as you I am also worried about attracting other women with my hair loss. If I had a wife or a girlfriend who is with despite the status of my hair my hairloss would bother me a lot less.

    When I think about it, treatments for hair might be years away but a good girlfriend might not come, ever, unless I try something. Whether or not I have hair. So you know I'm gonna divert my energy towards that, and not towards hair loss.

    And women who don't want to be with you because of your hair loss, well they haven't passed prescreening process .

  10. #10
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    Hairloss is not the end of the world
    I agree. Hair loss is not the end of the world...just the end of your sex life.

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