Coping with depression

[facingthetruth]

This is a long 'story', so here goes!

Hi, I'm 19 this year and I have been living with hairloss ever since I was 13. As a girl, this is reaaaaaalllllyyy demoralising, and I have extremely low-self esteem, though I have quite a social life . My very thin hair I feel can be a major hindrance to how I feel about myself. It is just that one stubborn obstacle, that prevents me from being my best among people.

IT started off as just really subtle thinning, so I didn't take much notice. But things got worst as puberty progressed. As I tied my hair up everyday for school, a bald patch became more noticeable. It came to a point where a teacher told me in class infront of all my classmates, "I think your hair is falling out too much."

I was devasted. I used to be defensive when someone asked me about my hair -or severe lack of it rather- but now I've learnt to just keep silent. It doesn't help to get testy. I won't say I've come to accept this atrocity. In fact, I am getting very depressed about it. I cry my eyes out sometimes because I find it unfair. Whenever I'm in the public eye, I find that I constantly pray or hope that people look past the baldness, and see me for who I am. I have never really talked about this with anyone, even if they've noticed the thinning or not. It's just a dilemma that I figure I have to get past by myself.

I'd like to say that I've been to many doctors and tried many different solutions to the hair loss problem, but I haven't. The main issue now is money as well. My family's in a hell lot of debt thanks to a member's excessive spending, and the only thing I've ever managed to try is a cheap bottle of topical elixir that obviously didn't work.

Recently, I've been contemplating shaving all the hair off, and buying a wig. I cannot accept myself totally bald in public yet. I feel like shaving this very instant as I type, but I will probably have to wait till early next year where I can start working part-time, to get a high quality wig.

In any case, can anyone tell me of good quality wigs that can even withstand activities like swimming in the sea? I am quite an active person. I read of lace wigs and things like that, are they strong enough? Are there any super-wigs that last for a life-time?

Also, how do I take care of a weak scalp?

Thank you very much, and to be honest, it felt kinda good to write it all out.