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    Nov 2011
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    Default Hairloss...depression, loss of self-confidence

    Hey guys,
    Im 19 years old and live in Germany. My parents are originally from Turkey, but they moved here about 25 years ago.

    I think it was about 1 year ago when my sister was playin with my hair.
    She said "wow are you balding? u've got some big temples there!"
    Actually I never really noticed it before and thought its normal. Maybe I was just happy at that time and not really worried. There was a girl..and we were really close to each other..well...I told her about my feelings..and got friendzoned. That was really hard for me, since I thought she would feel the same. I'm not that much into dating girls or stuff like that.. so I rarely find a girl that I really like (still virgin). Its not like that I couldnt have had any girls yet, but I am/wasnt really interested in those girls which are/were interested in me so far.
    Time passed and I continued my life. I'm a passionate skateboarder. Skateboarding is..was.. basically my life! I went skating almost every day...until I tore my ACL and my menisc (end of february). That day radically changed my life:
    I couldnt skate anymore, couldnt hang out and skate with my friends..and didnt really know what to do with my time. Its probably hard to understand for you, but I think that everyone has a hobby which he really really really loves...imagine that it is taken away from you from one day to another.
    I went through 2 surgeries and went through a hell lot of physical therapy, but I was still really depressed.

    So one day I went to my barber and he cut my hair as he always used to do.
    I dont know if I wasnt really aware of it..or the tempels have become really bigger, but that was the first time I was worried about hairloss.
    I went home and washed my hair and noticed a really big amount of hair in the shower. I thought "thats probably just the cut hair".
    Next day.. the same, next day again.., next day..
    It really started worrying me.

    So I went to a dermatologist and he pulled some of my hair out of my temples and took some blood. One week later he got the results and told me that everything was ok with my blood... but that my hair showed the signs of MPB. I thought WHAT? That cant be..nobody in my family has or had MPB with such a young age. My father is 46 and slowly starts losing his hair, all my uncles and even my brother..they all show absolutely no signs of hair loss.
    SO WHY ME?

    I really got depressed. I mean really depressed. I didnt really eat. I couldnt really sleep. I would look at my hair and my temples almost 15 times a day using mirrors to look from different perspective. I started counting the hair which I lost when showering. I couldnt focus on anything and felt really socially isolated.My parents were really worried since I became really quiet (Im usually a person which talk and laughs a lot).

    Hairloss basically ruled my life and I suffered a lot.

    Now Ive started to pull myself out of this. I mean it doesnt help at all to be worried 24/7. I cant afford to buy regaine or propecia since Im a student, and actually Im really scared of the side effects. Im 19...if I start using propecia..how long am I supposed to take it? Until I'm 23,24..30..40!?
    That cant be a solution...I mean if you take propecia for such a big amount of time, it should be only a matter of time to get the side effects.

    So I think the only solution for me is..acceptance. But that is easier said than done..

    I think that I'm at Norwood 2-3 (dont really get the difference) at the moment. The back of my head and my temples are sometimes really itchy, but I dont know if they itch because of hairloss..or because of my paranoid behaviour to go through my hair and look for bald spots or if the tempels are getting bigger. I have really thick darkbrown-black kinda curly hair, so nobody really notices my hairloss, when I dont tell them or pull my hair back to show my temples. But hiding cant be the solution, since it will probably can become worse.

    Should I buzz my hair off?
    Or shave?
    I think if I shaved my hair, Id always have a 5'o clock shadow, since my hair is so thick and dark

    Here are some photos ( I pulled my hair back)

    http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/7184/img0517qf.jpg
    http://img856.imageshack.us/img856/2980/img0519z.jpg
    http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/4784/img0524ws.jpg

    What do you think of it?
    Which stage of Norwood am I?
    Should I buzz my hair off? Would it fit to me? (please be honest)

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