Dating and hairloss - BaldTruthTalk.com
+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 1 of 1
  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Posts
    3

    Default Dating and hairloss

    Hi all, 



    Iím hoping some of you can help me with advise. Maybe some of you have experienced a similar situation or maybe just wanna share their opinion. 

Iím balding for a few years now. First signs where about 10 years ago. Iím now at a NW2-3. I am receiding on the sides and diffuse thinning on top. There is still some coverage not to much tho. In strong light you can see skin especially from the top. Hairlines are noticeable but i donít really care about those even though everyone sees them. For some reason (think i saw an ad) I started using toppik about 4 months ago and was blown away by the results. Got confidence back and was super excited. I mainly use it on top and donít apply it to sides. I was planning on using it for a few months and then shave off my hair to see how it looks and if it was looking allright keep it, if not consider a hair transplant.

I already had a few consultations with hair transplant clinics. Even though non of my options are appealing I think the hair transplant sounds best if i would consider doing anything. I donít think iíll have the best looks when iím bald. My head shape isnít the best for it and i donít have a lot of facial hair. The only thing holding me back is that i rather not take finasteride. It comes down to the fact i did not yet decide what and if iím doing anything about this problem. Could go the way of embracing it and trying to keep whats left for as long as possible.

    Current interventions for controlling hair loss: 

    Starting PRP therapy this week 

    Starting topical finasteride next month with micro needeling.

    Supps (Saw Palmetto, biotine etc)

    Shampoos.

    When i was using toppik i met a girl and weíve been dating for the last few months. We have a great connection and i feel like it could really work out. If it wasnít for me losing my hair this would be the best time ever. I actually feel like iím in love and she might be the one and I think she feels the same way. You probably know where this is goingÖ Unfortunately we donít live near each other so we can only meet up once every few months. I never told her Iím wearing toppik so my problem is mostly that iím not sure how (and if) i should bring this up. Not doing so is feeling like iím tricking her. Thatís why I feel like i have to do something. The thing is.. iím not sure how to bring it up without being insecure or without losing her/being rejected. Because weíre still dating i think the way I say it can have a big impact on her decisions to keep dating or maybe quit it. Good to know also. She complemented me on my hair once so she probably likes it. She touched my hair once and i had the feeling she noticed the structure is different. So i think she already knows its not in the best shape. 

Iíve considered the following option to deal with dating and hairloss/toppik use:

    1. Not telling her and stop dating. The distance is already a thing, deep down i would rather make something happen but its gonna be hard anyway. I know this option is really extreme but I sometimes I feel like i donít want to deal with rejection. mostly because it might have an impact on future decisions i will have to make about embracing baldness or doing something about it. For example; If she dumps me it might feel like I MUST do something about my hair. I want to be able to make the decision on my own (if she chooses for me regardless Iím open to hear what she thinks is the best option, in fact i would love to know)
    2. Cut down on toppik. Use less so that it is clear iím thinning. Casually tell her that iím thinning and share i might go for a buzz cut this summer. Hope sheíll like the idea and pray the contrast of the Toppik haircut with a little hair vs the buzz cut without toppik isnít to big. Iím afraid it might but not really sure. In this scenario I wonít tell about toppik unless she asks. Which is probably happening cause she might be surprised why i want to go with a buzz cut and she might try to convince me it still looks great. Iíd tell her the same thing if i where her probably. Especially if she really likes my hair. Iím not sure how to react on this. I might say something like. ďYeah it is still ok, but I just want deal with it while its not to obviousĒ. Or ďyeah I donít really think so and iím tired of worrying about itĒ. 
Writing about it i notice iím not to excited to tell her about the toppik use. Thought on this are welcome??
    3. Tell her iím using toppik and that iím gonna shave it off. This would be hard for me to tell her cause i guess she would then ask how it looks without Toppik etc etc. I picture this being a really awkward situation. In my opinion the difference is pretty big. Not the most extreme examples you see in commercials but you will see some skin, while with the use of toppik you wonít. I think this option would be most vulnerable and i could also come off as being pretty insecure about it. Which I am! Then again this option would feel so awesome if she wouldnít mind and would be supportive. Not sure if that would happen though. Cause you go down in looks and you show how insecure you are. I know most women donít really dig that.
    4. Not tell her anything. Shave off my hair unannounced and just let her deal with it. Share a photo or a text so that she at least knows it next time we meet. Then hope for the best reaction and keeping my buzzed hair as healthy as possible and hope it looks allright. I think this could be a shocker to her. But it also just might be in my head. Also difficult to say cause i donít know how big the difference would be.
    5. Tell nothing and hope my hair gets thicker from treatments. Then stop toppik and buzz my hair whenever. Small chance tho that it will get thicker (even with PRP finasteride lotion etc.)

    Also good know is that i already met a few of her friends. She has both guys and girls as friends and iím pretty sure she shares almost everything with them. Iíve even considered what would happen if she shares one of the above conversations with them. Then they also might be surprised or maybe even say something like: ďyeah, something was up with his hairĒ or ďdoes he uses something cause i didnít see itĒ.

    I donít want to lie about anything but i donít feel like i have to share everything with her. If she asks me if iím using products in my hair i will answer it. But if sheís not asking iíll just share what i wanna share. My main goal is to let her realize i wonít have a full set of hair and she can take it or leave it. Iím not sure but I really do think she already saw that my hair is thinning in a way but probably thought it might take some time before it would get worse. Iím really not sure how women look at this and if they even bother. I might make a big thing about it and i actually hope that is true.

    For people reading this to find out more about toppik. Be careful using it after e certain phase NW 1-2. And if you use it consider this scenario. It really keeps me up at night. Toppik is an awesome concealer and it boosts your confidence. So in a way i might have owed it to toppik i met this girl. But it might be the reason iím gonna loose her as well. And its gonna hurt so much more then being rejected on the night we met.

    What do you all think i should do and why? I really needed to get this out of my head! This helped allready.

    Thanks so much for reading and for any replies! And i'll make sure to give an update on what i did.

Similar Threads

  1. Dating with hair loss...
    By FlightTL in forum Men's Hair Loss: Start Your Own Topic
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 08-29-2017, 06:40 PM
  2. dating apps
    By tryingtostaypositive111 in forum Introduce Yourself & Share Your Story
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 08-24-2017, 07:30 AM
  3. Dating a new girl and she wants to....
    By NOhairNOlife in forum Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 02-18-2016, 10:09 PM
  4. Dating and wigs?
    By Jaclyn in forum Women's Hair Loss Treatments
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 04-29-2015, 02:26 PM
  5. Study on balding men and dating
    By khan in forum Men's Hair Loss: Start Your Own Topic
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 08-30-2012, 03:58 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

» IAHRS

hair transplant surgeons

» The Bald Truth

» Recent Threads

Dermarolling Community Trial
07-23-2013 11:08 PM
Last Post By PAS
Today 01:20 AM
Very Useful Tool To Help You How Many Grafts You Need
Today 12:35 AM
by Foell
Last Post By Foell
Today 12:35 AM
Any recent experiences with Dr. Robert J Dorin in NYC?
08-31-2018 02:57 PM
by njay6
Last Post By Spex
Today 12:29 AM
Am I Balding?!? Please help!
Yesterday 05:16 PM
Last Post By CrispyKevinBacon
Yesterday 05:44 PM
Hair transplant questions ? Statistics ? Possible outcomes?
10-07-2018 11:23 PM
Last Post By DJM
Yesterday 03:46 PM