About to turn 22 and nearly completely bald

[Dos Equis]

I have been coming to this forum for nearly two years and finally decided to make an account tonight. I am 21 years old and nearly completely bald on top (looking to be a Norwood 6 approaching 7). I tried taking propecia at the age of 18 when I first noticed my hair thinning in the front but stopped one month later after I experienced the sexual side effects that they say only occurs in less than 2% of people who take it. When I first noticed my hair was thinning I tried hiding it by growing it out as long as I possibly could. Unfortunately by the time I was 19 I became so self conscious because every time the wind blew, my hair would fly around and people could see I was styling my hair in a way that hid my baldness. At that point I thought I should just embrace my hair loss and just shave my head.... so I did (right down to a guard 1). For awhile I forgot I was going bald and things started to seem good because most people could not notice my hair thinning. I was content with myself until I noticed the 5 o'clock shadow on my head was thinning at a fast pace in the front so I kept shaving hair closer to my skin until I was buzzing my head at a zero guard every 5 days. At this point I was so self conscious that I would wear hats on the third day after shaving my head because I didn't like my head shape and I began to feel like I was old because nobody believed I was only 20 years old. A girl I feel in love with told me she wasn't physically attracted to me and began to date another guy and from that day one my insecurities took control of my life in ways I'm still feeling today. By the time I turned 21 I was so insecure with myself that I began my routine ofwearing hats. A couple of months ago I decided to grow my hair out and let it grow for about two months. After that I decided to visit a hair transplant surgeon because I was tired of feeling insecure. However, after examining my case he informed me that I might be a DUPA (diffused unpatterned alopecia) case which really crushed me. Right now I am in a really low place in my life. I feel depressed and unhappy with my appearance even though I'm still so young. I wear hats everywhere I go and I pass up opportunities that come my way because I'm self conscious of my appearance. I know I still have my health but I never thought something as glamorizing as hair could change somebody so dramatically. I have yet to meet one person my age that can relate to my hair loss but this forum keeps me optomistic that one day I will have a thick head of hair again.

If anybody has any advice please give it to me because I'm struggling to move on with my life and get past my insecurities.

[Prince2583]

Hey, so I was reading your article and I'd like to tell you that hairloss sucks. I started going bald when I was about 23 and I am now 27 and probably at the end of my run with hair. I usually just shave my head but it sucks because I have a big schnozz and I think being bald isn't my best look. But... the point of my post isn't to further discourage you or get you down on your looks, it sounds like you are already doing enough of that to yourself. The point is to get you to feel comfortable in your own skin. Not everyone was born to be a model, or a suave debonair dude with long flowing locks and I think that women realize this! How boring would it be if every guy had the same look, the same hair, or just hair in general. Embrace your uniqueness. So you don't have hair, it sucks I know, but try and go clothes shopping and buy a nice wardrobe that makes you look unique. Workout, and workout hard, if you take care of yourself the women will naturally be attracted to you. Are you gonna get rejected at times by women. Yes. Will it be because of your baldness sometimes? perhaps. But think for a second, would you really want to be with a judgmental girl in the first place? Nope. She's not worth it. Hope that helps man. Take care.

[Don'tDoIt]

That is great advice the Prince2583 has given.

I wish I was in your shoes. I'm not. Why? Because I foolishly had a hair transplant. Now I cannot shave my head because of the strip scar in back.

You, however, still have that option. If I was in your shoes, I would shave everything or buzz everything short.

By the way, a good site for you to visit is slybaldguys.com. Go to that website and search under "Beginners" and "30 day rule." You will encounter many commenters who have been in your exact situation.

[Dr. Glenn Charles]

These are really good responses. I only wish I could help the guys that are in your situation. I do believe that many women are attracted to a guys confidence and attitude. Being in good shape also helps. There will always be the superficial chicks that are only interested in outward appearence and the size of the your bank account. These are probably not the girls you want to end up with.

[PayDay]

Confidence definitely helps with women, but it’s not easy to be confident when you're young and losing your hair. Most of us here have been through it and we all have our ups and downs. The best thing I ever did for myself was to find Spencer Kobren’s radio show. It has been my hair loss therapy for years. Listening to him talk about his life and talk to other guys who live with this has completely turned my life around. The way he talks to people and shares his own insecurities and how he’s coped with it is so inspirational. He always says that there is life after hair loss and it’s so true! If you haven't listened you should. He has a knack of making people feel better even when they are at their lowest. He sure helped me!

[Dr. Glenn Charles]

I agree. Spencer's show it really helpful to lot of people. I need to try and get on the show more often. There are a lot hot topics that many would find interesting. Unfortunetly, having three little kids makes it difficult to get any free time.

[jooder]

Hi..
In many ways it seems that your choice is made up for you...... which although it may not seem so right now......... could be a blessing in disguise.
You dont seem to be a good candidate for a hair transplant....... so shaving is the best choice for you. Shaving and taking meds is an option to you or just shaving and doing nothing is too.
Some women will never go out with a bald man.... some women would never go out with a red headed person either... or a fat person...... the list goes on and on.
This is the way i see it.... shaving is pretty much made up for you. You can either fix other things that you have control over or get depressed, get fat and make yourself more unattractive physicaly and emotionally.
Get in shape, take care of your teeth and skin, dress well and enjoy things you love to do......believe me.... you will meet somebody.
I have been bald for many years and shave.......and i dont have any problem getting a good looking girlfriend. I also keep in shape (im no muscle man!) and look after myself in other ways.
Heres a link to a dramatic transformation from an obese bald guy to quite the opposite. Imagine if he got a tan and did the other things too! Im not saying you are like this guy at all......just trying to be shown what can be done...

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=108359701