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Please how do I make it stop.
Hey guys I'm 20 years old I'm slick bald I've had a bald spot since middle school. I've been made fun of for it by girlfriends and random people and it's hurt me so much. I've been a prisoner to my hat for years I'm so uncomfortable with myself that I wear a hoodie with the good up all the time. because I can't stand the sight of myself. last week I left work crying three times because I just kept freaking out and freaking out. my mind is so fixated on it because my head shape is so ****ed up and there is nothing I can do about it. Everyone tells me I'm fine but my head is so horizontal and so long and my forehead protrudes over my eyebrows. I want to kill myself so bad I can't escape my nightmare and I've been trying. I've been lifting weights I've been meditating to try to calm myself thinking positive but nothing helps I've had a shaved head for a year and it hasn't gotten any easier. I don't know what else to do. here are pictures.
http://imgur.com/a/dM6e4Yx
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Losing your hair at 20 is not fun. Happened to a couple of my buddies and both of them admit it was hard.
First and foremost, your head shape is fine. Is it perfect? No, but it's round and certainly not a weird shape.
Secondly, you have the perfect skin tone for a shaved head. You have good skin, and that is a huge plus.
Hitting the gym and building muscle is a good move. Men will respect you more and chicks love a good strong physique.
You have a strong enough jawline to pull the look off also.
One thing I do recomend, work on growing more facial hair. I see you've got a little going on, but full stuble is a good look. If you can't grow it (like I couldn't at twenty) then look into the minoxidil experiement on YouTube. I've done it, and it works a treat. Filled in some patches for me.
Look, away from all of this, I'll level with you. You lost your hair at 20, the next 5 or so years won't be your best in terms of girls. But dude, by the time you're 25, a lot of girls won't care, and by the time you're 30, nearly all girls won't give a shit.
Their priorities change as they get older.
Just hang in there dude, work on other areas of yourself, appreciate everyone has their day, and yours is coming. Keep yourself in shape, better yourself in other ways, and in a few years when your buddies all start to bald etc then you'll be the one at the top of the pile.
Stay strong, talk to family about how you feel, it will be okay, I promise
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I appreciate this man, family has all seen my head and says that I am crazy because I have a good head shape. I obsess about even the tiniest things like for instance, I was buying a dual monitor and thought if I'm bald should I have this? Would people look at me weird? Now I'm like what was I thinking I guess I have a persona that I'm doomed. I don't care about the girls I've had a few girlfriends but I never chased after them. I guess my headshape is something that I have to learn how to deal with. Funny you mention it ive been using minoxidil on the beard I just prefer the little chin hair and "mustache" lol. I started lifting about two three months ago and when I did, I didn't even think about my baldness because I was making so much progress but then my hands started to go numb and I have terrible back pain. Luckily I've been feeling good and when I lift weights the whole day I feel amazing. I need to stop with my negativity and start thinking positive, any tips on how to accept it? Thanks for taking the time to reply man, I'm in a really low spot and this means more to me then you think.
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In relation to the gym - research. YouTube is an amazing source of information. Particularly AthleanX.
If you've injured yourself, rest up, see a doctor if needed, then get back in the gym armed with proper form and technique, which you can acquire through research as stated.
Remember, nutrition is key, and NEVER, and I mean never, skip leg day
In terms of accepting it, I won't lie, I myself can't accept losing my hair, otherwise I wouldn't be here haha
But, what I would say is; in relation to other insecurities I have that I deal with, as all people do, is that I remember no one on this planet is perfect (except maybe Chris hemsworth, but that dude got annoyingly luckily in the genetics department haha) and I cant hold myself to this unreasonably high level of perfection.
Everyone has their issues with their looks, and some people obsess more than others about different things. Something tells me from what you've said here is that if you are thinking as ilogically about things such as buying a dual monitor, then you'd find something else to worry about even if you had a full head of hair.
You've identified in hindsight that your thought process over the dual monitor wasnt logical, which is great, but In truth, you need to ask why you're thinking like that in the first place.
For example, would you yourself, ever think someone shouldn't own a laptop or nice car because they have a bad dress sense, or acne, or are out of shape?
I wouldn't, so again, don't hold yourself to that standard. You went bald, it may be stopping you from feeling like yourself, but it didn't stop you being a human being, and you're still worthy of everything good life has to offer, however you want to be happy, allow that for yourself, if anything you deserve that more because you went bald and went through this than if you didn't.
It's good women aren't a major focus for you because that will come in time, and you seem a smart kid for 20, articulate and such, so I'm sure you'll be fine in the grand scheme of life away from all this.
Lastly, and I have to say this, the biggest killer of young men worldwide is suicide, it's a horrible fact but a true one.
If you are genuinely feeling that low you consider killing yourself, please put the phone/computer down, speak to family, and seek professional help. Don't worry about my mad ramblings here, just get yourself in a better headspace with people who know you best, and those who are trained to help. Make sure you do that, I just wrote you this essay of a response so you owe me that if nothing else
Life is beautiful, even if you can't see it right now, it will get better.
Merry Christmas bro.
Originally Posted by bollo665
I appreciate this man, family has all seen my head and says that I am crazy because I have a good head shape. I obsess about even the tiniest things like for instance, I was buying a dual monitor and thought if I'm bald should I have this? Would people look at me weird? Now I'm like what was I thinking I guess I have a persona that I'm doomed. I don't care about the girls I've had a few girlfriends but I never chased after them. I guess my headshape is something that I have to learn how to deal with. Funny you mention it ive been using minoxidil on the beard I just prefer the little chin hair and "mustache" lol. I started lifting about two three months ago and when I did, I didn't even think about my baldness because I was making so much progress but then my hands started to go numb and I have terrible back pain. Luckily I've been feeling good and when I lift weights the whole day I feel amazing. I need to stop with my negativity and start thinking positive, any tips on how to accept it? Thanks for taking the time to reply man, I'm in a really low spot and this means more to me then you think.
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Still around man, I'm going to remove the pictures because i want to put this past me but leave the thread up. I went to the doctor and was able to start lifting again and made an appointment with my therapist and as of now I'm trying to correct my negative thinking. Thanks to you my friend you've saved me from doing something that I would've regretted. If I've made it this far there is no sense of quitting right now. Thank you so much I hope you find your peace, I hope you had a wonderful holiday and a prosperous new year!! Onwords and Upwords!
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Really pleased to read this. Good luck with everything and stay strong.
Originally Posted by bollo665
Still around man, I'm going to remove the pictures because i want to put this past me but leave the thread up. I went to the doctor and was able to start lifting again and made an appointment with my therapist and as of now I'm trying to correct my negative thinking. Thanks to you my friend you've saved me from doing something that I would've regretted. If I've made it this far there is no sense of quitting right now. Thank you so much I hope you find your peace, I hope you had a wonderful holiday and a prosperous new year!! Onwords and Upwords!
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