+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 16 1 2 3 11 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 155
  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    52

    Default Going bald, and going back...

    I recently joined this forum, and after reading ridiculous posts by people like 'fixed by 35', I thought it was time to share my story... my whole story.

    Age 18 - In highschool, one of the more popular kids, in the 'jock' crowd. Cut my hair short during basketball season, didn't know it at the time but my temples were definitley thinning. After a summer league game, I got into an argument with a player from the other team... he backed down, but as he drove away yelled out the window "nice receding hairline!". Brushed it off, no big deal its always been thin there, right?

    Age 20 - Been in college for a few years now, 15,000 student, I am well known on campus, always out at parties, always meeting girls. My hair has continued to thin, I am aware of it now. My roommate will look at me from time to time and say "wow your hair is thinning!" then look at his in the mirror to make sure his isn't. I started taking propecia, who knows if it was working.

    I was on the powerlifting team, taking a lot of suppliments (not steroids, but andro to naturally increase my testosterone). Thought maybe the andro was doing it, so I stopped and thought my hairloss did too. I always wore hats to class, thank god I looked good in them. By my junior year I was known as 'blue hat guy' but I didn't care, I had one of the hottest girls on campus as a girlfriend (who didnt mind my thinning hair). If I ever got worried about what my hairloss looked like, I decided it couldn't be that bad right... people still liked me!?

    Age 22 - Now its really going... I cant stand it. I decide if you cant beat it, join it. I shave my head during the summer months before school with a straight razor... it definitley looks different! Luckily I would think to myself, I met my girlfriend while I still had hair, and she loved me. I was known as a 'tough guy' at college so no one really would ever say anything about having a shaved head to me... but guys who werent balding shaved thier heads too... it made us look 'tough' as long as I didnt carry myself like I was ashamed of it, even though I was. I would shave as much as I could to reduce the stubble so you couldn't tell where it started and stopped. To make it look like being bald was by choice. Looking at old pics now... I looked handsome, even without hair. I was still confident (at least thats the vibe I put off) but was always wondering if there was anything I could ever do.

    Age 24 - Now I am in the coorporate world, got a great job out of college (as a bald guy) ... still was envious of people my age with hair, which seemed to be about everyone I knew. This sucked... I had a lot of money saved up for a big move I was making... more than I needed. On my way home from work one night saw an ad for a HT doctor. Cant hurt to schedule a cosultation right? Within a month I was all set up for my HT (2750 grafts, scar from ear to ear smiling at anyone who walked behind me).

    It grew in fast, really fast! I was so excited that hair was on top of my head again! Everyone knew, all my clients, coworkers... they thought it looked great. One client asked if he thinks the same procedure could help him. Had a new intern come to work for my company, I worked directly with him. He was balding... eventually asked me for advice on getting a HT. I cant remember what I told him, but I am sure it was more towards getting one than not. The thing is, these people had no idea how much I worried about looking like a fraud. Everymorning waking up and spending a lot of time on my new hair, making sure it sat right, stayed in place, ect ect...

    Age 25 - Now I moved, changed careers, moving up the ladder. Making twice as much as I made before I moved... when I was bald. But I continued to thin around the transplant, still losing hair to shock loss around the donor site, its still noticeable that my hair isnt as thick as someone who has a natural head of hair. My new GF constantly wanted me to take drugs... but thats just denying the inevitable in my mind. Ditched the girl. Played sport all the time, worked out all the time, made lots of money at my new job... this is where things started to change.

    Not only was I constantly worrying about what my hair looked like, in wind, in sunlight, in water, when i wake up... the list goes on and on... I was working with a high end exec. who had a horrible wig. My boss at the time was a very very strong willed person, and I remember him saying "That guy needs to embrace his hairloss and get over it..." (about the exec.) Cleary i was doing a good job covering up the fact that my hair on the top of my head was from the back... or was he trying to tell me something too? Still thinning.... and thinning. Was this something I wanted to keep putting money into?

    Age 25-30 - Met my wife, switched careers again, cut my hair really short, even the transplants. I dont know how noticable it is to others, but its clear to me that hair doesnt belong there. Its killing me now. Did I do the right thing and set myself on this path to constant HT's to maintain hair on my head, or was it a big mistake. I stop working out... I stop playing sports, I stop being social. My wife notices. Meanwhiel...

    I was recruited by a company to do new start ups (so people dont mind that I am pretty much bald!?!), and unfortunatley in the economy that medical device company went belly up. quickly landed a job in the most uncomfortable industry possible. Pharmacueticals... you wouldn't believe the number over ex-college cheerleaders these companies hire! I always joke about 'why hire me?!'... because of my hairloss. I found the courage to tell me wife during this time... shes ok with it and completely understands... also found the courage to tell her I am through with it.

    In the past 2 years I have become increasingly more comfortable with my natural hairloss. I'm not mad anymore. I am not buying into the hype from the media that balding is a bad thing (ever watch late night tv??). Balding is natural, way more natural than moving hair around on your head. Would you rather have someone walk past and think 'another bald dude' or walk past and think 'whats up with his hair?' ...

    I am now in the process of getting scar reduction and laser hair removal. Life was good when I was bald, and I never had to worry about what my hair looked like (which now consumes my life... or did). My hair no longer defines who I am in this life. I have realized that 99% of other people don't care that I am bald... I have a beautiful wife, an amazing job in an industry that is stereotyped for hiring goodlooking people, and good friends. Will you be able to tell when its all said and done that I once had a HT, of course (even though the idea is to back to as much of normalcy as possible) ... but I don't care. I made mistakes and now I can tell people about them instead of HIDING them. I can help others make choices. I can go back to living my life ...

    Balding can be a debilitating thing, especially when your the first of your peers to experience it. Depending on how strong of a person you are, you think its the end of the world... I did.

    I grew up a lot since then. I read posts on forums from young guys in their early 20s or late teens and think of myself and how I was thinking those same things. Luckily for me, even though my hairloss consumed me (with and without the HT)... I never let it hold me back and never lost confidence in who I was as a person. It saddens me to read posts from other people; 'if I go bald I'll kill myself' ... 'bald people are discriminated against... i have statistics to prove it!'. Wake up people. No one cares that your bald except you. It took me a while to learn that... but I am so happy I did.

    For anyone going through this, or having any questions about HT's or balding in general, I will always be available to talk to.

  2. #2
    Senior Member KeepTheHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    HAIRMAX LASERCOMB = SCAM
    Posts
    1,214

    Default

    Well...


    I think balding has a different effect on some people. For you, you were still attractive.

    Let me tell you a short story that describes my hair loss:

    When I was 16 in school with long hair a LOT of girls always looked at me in class...you know that second look. They would look behind them and them look again. and again. Some even stared at me. They definitely liked me.

    I didn't have the greatest looks but my hair definitely fit my eyes and face/head extremely well. It looked bloody amazing actually.


    Now, those same girls look at me and then give me a smirk as if to say "LOL, what happened!?! haha"

    It's extremely annoying... It changed my life completely. I never had it easy and to be honest I have always been insecure about my looks...I always thought I had bad looks. But now I actually HAVE bad looks because of hair loss. I guess there are people that look worse. I still look...eh ok.

    But really...you won't BELIEVE the change it made. It's unbelievable.......

    I myself am in denial about it. Can it really change it that much?


    YES, IT CAN.

    It did.


    Hair loss completely changed my life. As if I wasn't shy enough already. This is like making everything way worse.


    I have had a decent amount of girlfriends in my life. None recently though. Hair loss isn't the only reason for it, but it is the biggest one at the moment.


    I promise you.... 90% of the girls give me that weird smirk now instead of the stare. It is really damn painful. Of course I am out of school now and I was talking about 1 year ago. Now things are even WORSE. If they see my crown now the smirk would be a laugh probably. I look bloody terribly compared to what I looked like!

    God it is unreal what a transformation it was for me.



    So, you can only speak for yourself in saying it doesn't change how people see you. My brother keeps making "baldy" remarks. My dad has said "You might go bald! But you wont have......." My mother looks at my hair and then does a "lol" smile. It's definitely refering to my hair as well.


    And no, this is not all in my head.


    If I go bald I have to be the unattractive retard in the group always. That will make me even less social. What the hell? This is so unfair. I looked great with hair...only realizing it now. But now that I lost it. Good god...what the hell...

  3. #3
    Senior Member KeepTheHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    HAIRMAX LASERCOMB = SCAM
    Posts
    1,214

    Default

    Oh, and it's not at all about girls.


    It's about being seen for who you are. It is amazing how people lose respect for you because your just "a bald guy". And it is really true. I mean I live this reality and I am sure others do the same.




    This is not all in my head...although my head is pretty messed up from all of this.


    Oh and I just want to say this again(posted in other thread): I am glad you have had a successful life as a balding guy. But you have to understand that the same thing is not so easy for others.

  4. #4
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    52

    Default

    Your right... because your the first of your peers to start balding you will get some harrassment, its only natural. Your young, your still at an age where people "pick on" you. I was always afraid of that in school... and it happened. People noticed I was balding. But its natural and people have to understand that... I didn't at the time. Think about when your older. Your friends will be balding... you will STILL be balding. Is this something you want to build your whole life around? Or learn to accept it? It took me a HT and 6 years to come to terms with it. Now I am on the other side... now people look at me cause they cant tell why i still have hair up there. I refuse to put more money into it... and I enev have penty of money to do it. But when does it stop? What if I have worse shcokloss this time and now my scars are exposed? With all the informercials you dont think people know what that scar is from when they see it?

    Sure some people you'll see have great results from HT's on this forum... amazing results. But thats a small amount of the population, and 99% are older guys who have completely balded and stopped. They dont have to worry about the future as much as someone under 30 does... If you go for a HT I wish you all the best, but ask your Dr. to garuntee results. He can't. You'll actually have to sign a waiver saying if it doesnt turn out as expected you cant sue.

    Let me tell you, I am not an attractive bald guy, I have a huge forehead and it makes me look older, sure ... but I don't carry myself like it effects me. Sure I am bald/balding... but I am a damn good athlete, very strong and in good shape, great at what I do for a living, very funny, very witty, good designer, good photographer, ect, ect ect... the list of goods goes on and on... as I am sure it does for you too. I know its not easy, and I know your at an akward age where balding isnt as acceptable. But f*ck those people... look them straight in the eye and tell them 'see you in 10 years when your right there with me' (sure some wont be, but maybe you'll get lucky!)...

    Its not easy, and it took me a long time to learn... and that might have happened because I am at an age when balding is socially acceptable. But all my HT did for me was give me 3-4 good years of life with hair. Now I have scars and hair on the top of my head, that is supposed to be on the back of my head. If I want to continue pumping money into it for unknown results I can... but f*ck that. Don't buy into this shit. Not at such a young age.

  5. #5
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    52

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by KeepTheHair View Post
    Oh and I just want to say this again(posted in other thread): I am glad you have had a successful life as a balding guy. But you have to understand that the same thing is not so easy for others.
    Life is what you make it, and if you want to make it all about putting hair on your head so be it. Maybe you'll get lucky and it will be a huge success.

    My life isn't completely successful but thats because of my own doing. I believe I was suffering from depression for the past 2-3 years. I avoided social interaction, I lost relationships, I missed work... but I am ready to quit this sh*t. Things are the way they are now because of choices I have made. I decided to get a HT at a young age. Now I have to live with the fact that it becomes more and more noticeable every day. I am 30 now. And I wasted enough of my life worrying about my hair. Unless your a hair model, hair doesnt get you anywhere in life, and not having it doesn't take anything away.

    If someone doesn't like you because your bald, f*ck them, you dont want some superficial a**hole like that in your life anyways. I haven't run into ANYONE who hasnt liked me becuase of baldness, including women. Sure you get picked on from time to time... but such is life.

  6. #6
    Senior Member KeepTheHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    HAIRMAX LASERCOMB = SCAM
    Posts
    1,214

    Default

    Thanks for the response.

    I think you definitely gained "some" wisdom from this.

    But like you said...for me it is extremely early to be developing(FAST) a bald spot. I mean 20? Seriously... My brother is 2 years older and my hair looks worse than his.

    The whole "see you in 10 years" thing just depresses me even MORE.


    10 Years? Id love ten years with hair. By the time im 30 it will be normal and I would found that someone that likes me for who I am. But right now it is just unacceptable to be balding. I have to fight it as much as possible because I would never be able to forgive myself if I just gave in.


    I also think because possible cures are coming closer and closer(as always...hopefully this time it's legit)that a hair transplant might be the right option for me. If I can do 1 procedure it should give me a good look. 2 would give me an amazing look.


    Pitty I live in a third world country where all the people I know who studied something have much less money than me! I don't have a single friend or know of anyone my age in this country who has more money than me...I don't even have that much. I have a few thousand dollars on my name. I make about $20+/hour. Which is unbeatable in a third world country at my age without any qualifications...

    I won't say what I do but I will say it is over the internet. I can't do it all day since it is not "easy". Usuaully "work" 2-4 hours a day, some days.



    This is not enough income to sustain myself and save up for a hair transplant... I already spent probably somewhere near $800 on my hair loss the past 2 months or so. I have a decent supply though, so it should last for awhile.



    I wish I had money for a hair transplant or 2...then I could just use finasteride/dutasteride and so on until perhaps there are better future options.

    At least I would have an amazing life for at least 5 years... but now everything is just crumbling. I am forced to live a different life...as a different person. Thats how I get treated. I am sorry for being human...and being a socially inclined mammal. I can't help it. Anyone who says "I don't care what other people think about me" is just denying reality. It is who we are.

    Everyone cares. Some have it easier though.


    I have given people the advice "just work hard" in the things that I am really good at(wont say again since I don't want to be open the possibility of being recognized or something...im paranoid) and that they are trying to get good at.

    I would give them "wisdom" but really... some people just have it different. Have different talents. Though I do strongly believe in hard work.


    What I am saying is...the whole wisdom thing just doesn't always apply for everyone. Everyone has a different perspective and in mine hair is a necessity.

  7. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    52

    Default

    But then what happens when you hit 30, and are now on the other side of the fence. Now you had 5 great years with hair, but you continued to bald. Now you have an 'island' of hair on the top of your head and your friends are saying 'let me see your hairline' for other reasons. You now also have scars on the back of your head that will never ever ever go away. Imagine yourself in that position. Will you have the money to continue to get HT's over and over during your lifetime depending on how bald you go?

    I thought I was... big mistake.

  8. #8
    Senior Member KeepTheHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    HAIRMAX LASERCOMB = SCAM
    Posts
    1,214

    Default

    I am very certain a cure will be available before I have troubles, is the thing.

    That is the reason why I am considering a HT. I don't care about a scar at the back of my head. I will wear my hair long and it will never be noticeable.

    If I could have all my hair back I won't care if they know I have a scar and where it is from. I will look better than them and be extremely confident.


    I am still considering a HT and will decide later this year.

  9. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    52

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by KeepTheHair View Post
    That is the reason why I am considering a HT. I don't care about a scar at the back of my head. I will wear my hair long and it will never be noticeable.

    ...

    I am still considering a HT and will decide later this year.
    Read about shock loss, i suffered from it and lost a lot of hair around my scar... it doesn't always grow back. and is noticeable on the sides of my head.

    Goodluck with whatever you decide!

  10. #10
    Senior Member KeepTheHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    HAIRMAX LASERCOMB = SCAM
    Posts
    1,214

    Default

    Thanks man. Time will tell...


    Damn... HT's....so many things can go wrong.

Similar Threads

  1. My photos. I am 36 years old and bald, bald, bald. :(
    By Red20 in forum Hair Transplant Veterans
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 10-22-2017, 08:57 AM
  2. Trichoscience is back
    By crashul in forum Hair Loss Treatments
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 05-06-2010, 01:17 AM
  3. Hair Transplant Done - Can I Go Back to the Gym?
    By TeeJay73 in forum Hair Transplant Veterans
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 12-10-2009, 02:25 AM
  4. How short can you wear your hair in back?
    By Nitro in forum Hair Transplant: Start Your Own Topic
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 01-09-2009, 08:41 AM
  5. I Want My Hair back
    By gusguts in forum Introduce Yourself & Share Your Story
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 11-25-2008, 09:13 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

» IAHRS

hair transplant surgeons

» The Bald Truth

» Recent Threads

1800 graft repair case results by Dr. Lindsey
Yesterday 08:38 AM
Last Post By Dr. Lindsey
Yesterday 08:38 AM
Navigating the German Job Market as a Kenyan Citizen
11-04-2023 06:31 AM
Last Post By Keegan212
Yesterday 03:51 AM
DR HAKAN DOGANAY/ 4500 GRAFTS / Implanter Pen+FUE
03-26-2024 04:15 PM
Last Post By Hakan Doganay, MD
03-26-2024 04:15 PM
The Mane Event for Thursday, June 15th, 2023
06-15-2023 02:59 PM
Last Post By gisecit34
03-26-2024 08:05 AM
Sun Exposure after Hair Transplant
02-26-2009 02:36 PM
Last Post By gisecit34
03-25-2024 08:24 PM