A Positive Post

[Fixed by 35]

Preferring to be dead than bald is not scary, it is rational, especially when you believe human life is a scientific anomaly rather than a grand design. In my opinion, because human life is nothing more than a mistake there is no meaning in life. Our only purpose is to be happy and make others happy until we die. There is no great need to produce offspring, especially when they will be miserable and second class anyway, nor is there any great reason to provide a legacy.

You only have one life and if you are barred from having the life you want there is little point making do and getting on with it because you'll never derive enough enjoyment from it to make you truly happy. You are left with two choices; to keep seeking perfection, or giving up and living with regret.

In my case, I will never be happy as a bald man. If baldness cannot be fixed, I will never derive much enjoyment out of life. Life for me would therefore be a waste of time. The reality of baldness is a mediocre, unchallenging career and rejection by the majority of the world's population, who are superficial.

Facing that stark reality, I am prepared to risk my life in order to pursue a better life. I hate my baldness, therefore I will take drugs that may be dangerous to my health in order to fight it. If I lose the fight, I'd rather die quickly than slowly. I don't want to spend 50 years or more as a bald man; if I am going to be bald for the rest of my life, I would prefer to die tomorrow.

There are others with different priorities who can get on with it, because their happiness is sourced from things that don't need a full head of hair. Unfortunately, I operate in a superficial world and need to be superficial myself externally to be truly happy. Superficial is normal.

You say go to another city: I have, but I'm still balding. In fact, it's harder in another city, because on top of everything else you have to overcome bald prejudice and discrimination. You say it's what's inside that matters; when what's inside is churned up by what's outside, there's nothing left worth preserving on the inside.

Unless you get the life you want, life is a waste of time. My life is a waste of time which I hope to change within a decade. If I cannot, I will simply wait in the burning sun eating too much ice cream, to see if skin cancer or heart disease get me first.