My 8 Year Plan

[heynow1234]

HAHAHA i gotta say i disagree with you on this one, but that line about "Hair by 35 or a huge binge followed by a fatal heart attack by 36. That's my plan!" is freaking hilarious, i sometimes think like that too and then i smack some sense into my head. Half the men in my family are bald and they all have awesome successful lives and families, so when I think of that I don't feel too bad. Im 26 now and a shitty NW 3 or possibly even worse, i grow my hair long and can cover to an extent. I just keep telling myself, that hair cloning or something will be around by the time im 35 so whats the worst that happens i suck it up for 10 years and live the life of a bald dude and then get my hair back. I dont ever think id get a transplant alot of the ones ive seen look pretty shitty. Hair loss sucks but billions of men have gone through it and prospered, and I refuse to think that they are all better and stronger than us!

Hang in there man, and if you do reach 35 and are bald let me know about that binge, id like to join you, it sounds like a blast!

[Fixed by 35]

Despite beginning to lose hair early, I think it's unlikely that I will reach a Norwood VI until I'm 60. I am perhaps fortunate in that my hair loss is very slow - I only recently started taking dutasteride again a week ago after spending three years doing nothing at all with very little regression. For the four years before that my efforts were sporadic and didn't involve much more than Revivogen shampoo. You may wonder why I took so little action at the beginning. Well, it used to bother me less and I didn't really think anything would work anyway. I've now been convinced by dutasteride, I like using Revivogen whether it works or not and I've also realised my plan to just wait for the cure could be fatal (the big future cures seem to be based on stopping any further follicles dying and regenerating healthy hair, so it's extremely important to hold on to what's left. I doubt anything will ever come out that works for a Norwood VII in my lifetime).

The two most concerning aspects of hair loss for me are not personal appearance or women. I have a stable relationship and besides basic hygeine appearances have never really concerned me. What is concerning is the way people treat you differently and the amount of extra work involved to change that.

When I was ugly, overweight and had hair I was still taken seriously. When I started losing hair, I didn't try to hide it, I didn't comb it over, I just cut it shorter. Since that day, I have received snide comments and my careers stalled, not for want of trying. I wasn't the one who lost confidence in me when my hair started to fall out; it was other people. Don't try to convince me otherwise. And by the way, I still think I'm great! I've still got my high IQ and my qualifications, I still have my work ethic. It's just a shame you need hair to sell it. I have a lot of confidence in myself, just no confidence in society's ability to operate without prejudice!

The only way you can become socially acceptable again, from what I can tell, is to shave your head so you look like a neo-Nazi and then spend most of your free time at the gym. I presume diet has to change too. Now, I'm sorry, but that is just too much work. I don't mind spending a lot of my time trying to regain hair, because I'm motivated to do it, but the idea of spending a significant portion of my life at the sink or in the gym just so my baldness can be socially acceptable is just not going to happen.

Seriously, why has no one else ever given this more thought? Shaving your face takes about 10 minutes, your head probably another 20. Shaving for 30 minutes every single day, just so you can look like a fashionable Nazi instead of a goof ball? Seriously now, life is too short that.

The there's the gym work. What, 1 hour a day, 7 hours a week, 365 hours a year, 10,920 hours of my life before I'm too old to need to be socially acceptable anymore? Just to look like Vin Diesel or someone else equally chavvy looking? There's no way I'm giving up a year and a half of my life for that.

And it's not just the gym either is it? Then there's diet. Basically, I'd have to adopt the diet of a diabetic or some other disease to look 'buff' enough. And they say hair loss sufferers only have a cosmetic problem. When you have to start changing your diet, that's a medical problem in my book! Plus, cooking has been a hobby all my life, I'm not going to give it up to eat rabbit food so I can look like a thinner version of Mussolini.

From what I can tell, there's three choices. First, be socially unacceptable and just bounce from one failure to the next until you can retire. Second, there's the option of giving up on your health, enjoying the binge and dying young. Finally, there's making an effort to be socially acceptable which will take up a huge amount of your free time. As far as I see it, cneither onstant failure or a life in the gym is particularly appealling, so I choose option 2.

[wheresMYhairDUDE]

Fixed By 35 - I arrived at your post from a search for one of the medications you metioned.

My story; my hair probably started thinning when I was 22 and has been ever since to the critical point - I'm 34 now and at the point where a visible bald spot is starting to form around my vertex, I have visible slight receeding hairline something lesser than a NW 2A (but not 2) and in my opinion if the pattern continues then one day I'll wake up a NW 5a, then a NW 6 then possibly a NW 7.

Do I want to be bald: NO.

Am I going to do something about it: YES - but in moderation and sensibly and not that it takes over my life.

If nothing helps: F**k it, shave it off and get on with my life - I know plenty of bald guys who are top people and get on with life. While I don't like the idea (and would prefer to have a head full of hair) I'm not going to let life pass me buy while I faff about with bald treatments and remedies and deal with side effects.

While reading your post I am overwhelmed by the level of negativity and defeatism you are projecting. I agree having hair is cool but not a necessity for a fruitful life. Obviously I can only comment on the state of play in England and can genuinley say that from my experience, in the employment market there is little difference (& significance) whether you have a full head of hair or are bald - unless of course you are applying for a shampoo commercial acting job.

Unless things are seriously different where you are from my gut feel is that you are being way too negative and have crossed over to a view of extreme negativity, defeatism and have other issues.

Yes, hairloss bothers me (hence why I am here) but then again I'm not the first or last male who will have this issue - obviously until a 'cure' or permanent 'fix' is released.

As I said before, I know a lot of balding, balder or men with shaved heads who accept their hairloss situation and are getting on with life (wit the people around them) and not letting their hair situation interfere.

If you are genuinely reflecting your feelings and anticipated actions in your post then so be it, but from what you have written I get the impression that you are letting (or anticipate) your hair situation get in the way of your day to day life. I also get the feeling that because of this you are shutting yourself out in day to day life in some way and it is this which has resulted in others treating you differently and hence lead to your convinced opinion that this is because you are subject to hairloss. I can only speak from my experience in England, but while hairloss certainly changes the way you look and may make you less attractive to some ladies it doesn't change you as a person. I have a couple of schoolfriends who have gone through hairloss and they have excellent personal situations as they have strong personalities and are nice people.

Sure I'm going to give hairloss treatments a go - I have started using rogain foam twice a day, taking some supplements once a day and am now looking to order some propecia or avodart to incorporate it into my regime. I'll give it a go as its fairly nice and easy. If I don't see results then thats too bad - the next step will be to consider a hair transplant. If all that fails then, hey ho, I'm going to keep what hair I have left very short or shave it all off completely. When that time comes I'll see how I look with either option. By no means am I going to turn into a boring old fart with a bald head - I'll still be me, but minus the hair - we come into the world bald and chances are will leave the world bald - its quite a consistent outcome.

If I find people will treat me differently with no hair, then f**k them, I'll find new people to hang out with - everyone is probably better off without people who can be so shallow. I'm still me, same person, same personality - but with little or no hair. My schoolfriends who have lost their hair are still the same person inside but with less or no hair on their heads and while they look different to school photos they are still the same lazy cheeky buggers with crap jokes and crap taste in music.

Bottom line in my opinion is that if hairloss bothers you so much then its going to take over your life. You seemingly 'slag' off shaving your head as in your estimation it takes too long each day, then you slag off men who work out as it also takes up a lot of time and involves a special diet. Well not every bald man works out to, I would go as far as to say the majority of bald/ing men don't work out and just accept it. Personally you just have to do what you feel comfortable with, whether it is shaving your head on a daily basis and working out or from your perspective feeling bitter about it and hating people around you. I mean, if you feel hair is so important to you then why don't you go for a hair transplant or if that isn't viable, get a wig.... thats like an instant fix - full head of hair with a well made modern wig - yes there is maintenance involved but its all relative to how much you value it.

Personally, from reading over your comments I get the impression that you are either over exagerating in your posts for some reason or you have outstanding issues in addition to hairloss.

Bottom line is that nobody wants to be bald, far from it, but then again the majority of men accept it and get on with their lives to the max, as you should. Its a fact of life and something that lots of people other than balding men accept. Bottom line is baldness isn't life threatening and if all that happens to you in life is you go bald - then I'd consier myself to have had a good life.

[Fixed by 35]

From reading your posts, I think you would be shocked and appalled at what goes on in some of the board rooms in England. As a former auditor, who regularly performed audit testing on companies' payrolls in the UK, I would like to point out the following:

1) I never audited a company in two years where the managing director was bald.

2) Bald men in the offices I audited were typically the most discriminated against, before women too, in terms of what they got paid for doing the same job.

3) Bald men were typically older than colleagues employed at the same level as them.

4) Bald men were the only group I ever saw who bore the brunt on cheap jokes. There were plenty of other easy targets: short men, fat women, heavy smokers for example, but for some reason their feelings are allowed to be spared.

The truth for bald men is that they are discriminated against in the workplace, most just aren't aware of it. The reality is that the discrimination isn't all that noticeable, but it is there. In a lot of cases, it just means you don't get the job or the promotion when you're against a similarly qualified candidate who has hair; you'd still get the job against a less qualified candidate, but it's harder to aim higher.

You'll also notice that as your career develops, you end up getting more technical rather than managerial roles (if you work in an office); you'll have to deal with the prejudice that bald men aren't managers. In the office I work a lot of bald men work in different senior roles, but they don't manage anyone.

You'll get paid less than others for doing the same job. That's just how it is.

You'll be excluded from front office work because you're not able to project the same 'professional' image too.

And so it goes on.

[wheresMYhairDUDE]

Fixed by 35, interesting post focussing on baldness in the workplace and your rather draconian opinion on treatment of bald men.

I have a question for you...

In your working life, how many men have you come across who wear hairpieces/wigs in the workplace and whose colleagues have no idea they are bald? Because I can assure you there are lots of men who do in offices/boardrooms up and down the country.

In my experience;

1. Sounds like you have been auditing the wrong companies over the last 2 years as in my experience of UK companies the boardrooms are full of balding or bald men and now even women.

2. There are things called 'anti-discrimination laws' which deal with such examples of discrimination. Again in my experience I have never come across a company or office that made balding/bald men sit in the corner or in the stationary cupboard.

3. This point makes no sense at all. Yes bald men can be of various ages as can their colleagues at comparable level - I think the key issue here is experience, maybe the 'older men' at the same level are only there because they do not have adequate experience to be at a higher level. Alternatively younger men might be at the same level as older men because they are quick learners/advancers.

4. See point 2, discrimination in the workplace laws are in place to tackle issues in situations where your company is full of a**holes who poke fun at anything because they are natural born jerks. Also how do you quantify that bald man bore the brunt of more jokes than fat/short people - did you do a study or come up with a mathematical equation?

To be honest I don't understand your motives behind posting here and from your posts I get the feeling you have becomes a very bitter person from your hairloss experience. Perhaps as you say you have had a bad life experience so far and feel life is out to get you. But the more I read of your posts I get the feeling that this might be an exaggeration and in actual fact its not been as bad as you make it but perhaps topped off with personal dissapointments which you have 'tagged' onto your physical balding condition.

This is of course unless your posts are purely aimed at having 'a bit of a laugh'
or your are doing some sort of research.

Fair enough you started off expressing your personal emotions in response to your balding and then put forward your action plan. Yes, you do sound very negative and I agree that this is to be expected amoung balding men as it is a big life change from a physical appearance perspective. What did strike me is that your posts present a big 'no hope' characteristic which in my opinion is completely the wrong approach to have. I find from other posters that they manage to get over their initial negativity and in a lot of cases become open to accepting baldness as a 'fact of life' and switch their primary response of 'oh my god' to a more subdued attitude of 'its only hair, if it falls out it doesn't change me as a person'.

The majority of posts on this subject matter I have read portray that the poster feels there is hope and through their actions they hope to find this through managing to stop their balding and regrow their hair.

I really do think that you have some deeprooted issues which may be worsened by your hairloss experience and anticipated future experience.
I would suggest that you seek professional help rather than continue posting about how bald men are the underclass when it comes to employment and the working environment. Quite frankly the majority of what I have read in your posts on that subject matter is poppy**** - I'm looking at the possibility of being bald and from an employment perspective this doesn't really faze me whatsoever.

You should realign your efforts into your hairloss regime. It's good you know that you don't want to shave your head or spend time in the gym to attain a better body to substitute not having a full head of hair. You have also set yourself some goals, which is excellent but which I do think you should reconsider slightly and remove the negative aspects of them.

Now it just remains to inject some positivity into your attitude towards your hairloss and regime as without it you will inevitably be starting on your journey with the perception it won't work and such an attitude usually leads to one outcome.

Head up high and I really do hope you manage to get over your current issues resolved and you see visible results with your regime - but remember life doesn't end because your hair falls out, despite common misconceptions and bumping into jerks who laugh at baldness.

[Fixed by 35]

Discrimination laws don't actually apply to baldness. In fact, there have been several valid bald discrimination cases in the past few years, all of them unsuccessful.

Discrimination laws typically only cover those who aren't discriminated against in the modern workplace, such as women. Indeed, men are typically far less well protected in the workplace; the only successful claims to date have been where the point of law equally favours both genders.

For example, men claiming discrimination for not having flexible working hours have succeeded, because it protects both gender's interests. Men claiming discrimination for having to wear a shirt and tie to work when women can come to work in a t-shirt have been largely unsuccessul, in contrast to women's cases to be able to go to work in trousers.

I think it is incredibly naive to believe discrimination laws are there to prevent discrimination. They are there to pursue the self interest of the person or group of people who lobbied to have them added to the statute book. However, this is going a bit off topic now!

[wheresMYhairDUDE]

However, this is going a bit off topic now!

Yep, you hit that on the head (excuse the pun)

I'm glad you're an auditor and not a lawyer.

Without knowing exactly which cases you are talking about and the specifics and basis of each claim - I cannot comment.

I can say that if anyone claims discrimination against baldness under some sort of disability act will be unsuccessful as baldness is not classed as a 'a physical or mental impairment' - this is the reason why so many bald men can actually get on with their lives without hair.

However, if someone claims discrimination on the basis they are being 'bullied' at work due to their baldness (and appearance as a result of lack of hair) and their employer is allowing this to continue then I expect this would be much more successful.

The gender difference examples you give are irrelevant as we are talking about male physical appearance and not gender differences or dress codes.

I do note you have not responded to my question of high profile men in companes who wear hair pieces/wigs....

We all know there are wig wearers out there in business and in show business and if their baldness doesn't stop them being high fliers why should us 'minions' worry about it so much?

I found an earlier post in this thread by hdude46 is spot on - anyone who feels hair is 'EVERYTHING' really is missing out on what life has to offer and they need to get over it or get a WIG then get on with life. If we all sat here and did nothing else than cry our hair is falling out then the disposable tissue companies would be making mega profits and we would all simply be wasting away.

So my advice is, lets not continue focussing on the negatives but lets look at some positives.

And by the way, can anyone here recommend a 'genuine' internet pharmacy for genetic propecia/avodart with quick delivery to the UK?

[Fixed by 35]

Inhouse Pharmacy is excellent for generic and branded avodart and propecia. I've found them to be an excellent source, unlike my idiot doctor whose so unsympathetic that I think he'd prevent me getting saw palmetto to make me embrace the Mussolini look.

However, if someone claims discrimination on the basis they are being 'bullied' at work due to their baldness (and appearance as a result of lack of hair) and their employer is allowing this to continue then I expect this would be much more successful.

You'd hope so wouldn't you? But nope, it seems to be one of the few things you're allowed to bully people for and get away with it. Go ahead and try to find a single claim. Unfortunately, it's as hard to spot as ageism, because typically the discrimination is committed at the interview stage, when a plethora of excuses are available (over qualified, under qualified, unsuitable, bad fit etc etc). I think it's fair to say women might like the Vin Diesel look; employers don't. In fact, I'd go so far as to say the one style acceptable for bald men is a chav style, which employers don't like; in other words, through no fault of your own, you're about as likely to get the job as a man with a mullet.

There may well be men at the top of business who wear wigs. I'm not entirely convinced by this though. I think if I look at the problem more closely, discrimination is more likely the younger you are when it starts. If you're in your 40s and balding, that's 'normal.' Plus, you've already started your career when you had nothing else to deal with and you might even be lucky to be judged fairly for your abilities. Plus a lot more of your friends will be having the same issues, which makes a difference in terms of confidence.

Bald men in their 20s are not considered 'normal.' It shatters confidence at a time when it is needed most. Grinning and bearing it does not restore that confidence, nothing does. They tend to find it harder to fit in socially with people of their own age group, they become outcasts at work... other than committing a crime, there is no bigger blow to a career than losing your hair too young.