+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    Senior Member Breaking Bald's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    At wits end...
    Posts
    593

    Default Really struggling at the moment

    I’m really struggling at the moment; every time I look in the mirror I barely recognise my face. I started losing my hair at 20, I turn 26 in a few weeks and I look like I’m in my early 30’s!! I’ve also had relentless acne for over a year now and it won’t subside even though I’m on antibiotics. It’s just making me have no confidence in my appearance. I was meant to have a trial shift tomorrow for some part time work in a Café but my appearance is making me so self-conscious that I even cancelled it. I don’t feel like woman my age will find me attractive anymore. I feel like I can’t relate to people my age and that somehow I don’t belong there because of how I look, I feel like an outsider. I’ve also lost my identity as a musician big time, I used to love my thick hair, it was something that people knew me for and it was something that I could kind of hide behind.

    Before you ask, I’m not on treatment, I won’t take propecia and I still don’t regret that decision. This is it for me, I’m too far gone, I can’t grow my hair out, I can’t style it in anyway, there is no texture or density and my hair looks like **** when grown out. I’m a diffuser and I’m ****ed, not enough donor hair for a transplant, too late for drugs, don’t want a hair piece and not sure about SMP. I’m at the point now where I have to shave it and accept it but HOW THE **** DO I DO THAT?? I still want to cling on to anything that frames my face. I’m still hoping some treatment is going to come out soon. I’m so sick of the constant highs and lows of it, sometimes able to accept it, other times hating everything about the way you look. Just the idea of now being constantly bald for the rest of my life ****ing SUCKS! I never would have thought this was going to happen to me.

    I was just traveling for four months and I shaved my head towards the end of the trip bald. For a while it felt great, I even pulled a really beautiful girl out there, who was however older, I noticed immediately that it was older chicks who digged it. It was different out there though, no one knew me, it was a hot climate, I was more distracted by my travels etc. Now that I’m back I‘m really struggling again! I’m just finding it really hard to come to terms with. I can’t bare it and I feel stuck! I don’t really know where I’m going with this post but I just wanted to express some of how I’m feeling right now. I’m just trying to brave up to the fact that I have to shave my head NOW and just move on but it’s so difficult and I’m sure many of you put there can relate. I wish I could just magic my hair back, it seems there is no help coming our way.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Posts
    379

    Default

    Looks are important but they aren't everything. Get a hobby man, watch some good shows, enjoy life.

    Think of the benefits of being free from your obsession and being at peace with it.

    You certainly aren't the only balding man. You chose not to treat it, time to move on.

    We all get old and ugly anyway and everything is temporary.

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Posts
    342

    Default

    I reckon 'temporary' SMP + FUE. That's my plan B. Not as good as having a bushy head again, but still looks youthful and deliberate, and creates a hairline.

  4. #4
    Senior Member HTsoon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    160

    Default

    I know how tough it is, I shaved my head for a year before going through with surgery, it's changed my life for the better.

    Did you ever consult with a doctor in person? What's your family history for hairloss? I think just having enough hair to frame your face with a buzz cut will change your outlook.

  5. #5
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    15

    Default

    I think many of us go through ups and downs with this. If you read my posts I'm certainly not immune to them.

    There's no way I'm going to tell you hairloss is fun, especially when your hair was something you felt you could hide behind.

    On the aging thing, though, I want to help you gain a little perspective.

    There are rocking 20's and aweful 20's, rocking 30's/aweful 30's, 40's = same, 50's = same. Just because you age doesn't mean everything you enjoy is gone, especially women. As long as you keep yourself in great shape and maintain your confidence, even when you feel like completely crumbling inside, you will do much better than those who give up/look out of shape/have nothing interesting to talk about with women. Losing your hair makes you work harder and, yeah, that's painful, but it keeps you in the game longer. You mention 'older women' find your shaved look more appealing. That's probably true. I mean, after dealing with A-holes who look great but bore them to tears, many are willing to look for what's on the inside. Yeah, it might be harder to get with them than someone who looks 'perfect' by societal standards, but don't let it knock down your confidence or faith that you will meet an awesome person who really likes you for who you are rather than ONLY how you appear.

    The fact that you play in a band already gives you a big leg up versus poor fellows chained to a desk. Women like that.

    As for the acne, you're doing your best. That's all you can do. I had the same problem and still have flare ups from time to time. The only things that helped were using a very basic soap with no perfumes/dyes/etc. (Dial Basics), basic shampoo and then found moisturizers that worked with my skin.

    If it helps:

    eye area: aloe vera gel.
    face: Hawaiian Tropic Sheer Touch Oil free (SPF 30 or 50)
    Body: Vasoline Aloe Vera lotion.

    Stress usually induces terrible flare ups, so I try to stay calm. I know, seems hard to do when one feels anxious about everything, but anxiety is the enemy.

  6. #6
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Posts
    1

    Default

    That sucks Breaking Bald, I think your loss was at a similar stage to mine when I used to read the forums a few years ago (thinning crown right?). Is your frontal hair thin too now? Have you had it confirmed you don't have enough donor hair left?

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    130

    Default

    no gettn around it that blows and went thru the same crap wen I was 20. by 25 I was a NW4. save ur money and get a HT and start savn as many grafts as u can. get on some meds if u can tolerate them without havn limp dick

Similar Threads

  1. Struggling!!!
    By Breaking Bald in forum Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 10-04-2016, 12:30 PM
  2. 'That' moment has come.
    By Not giving up in forum Men's Hair Loss: Start Your Own Topic
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 10-01-2015, 12:37 PM
  3. The moment of realization
    By reacttome in forum Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 05-07-2015, 08:11 AM
  4. Really struggling need advice!
    By Marshmalo in forum Hair Loss Treatments
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 03-07-2013, 10:19 PM
  5. 23 and struggling dealing with this
    By TheSuburbs in forum Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life
    Replies: 41
    Last Post: 01-16-2013, 11:02 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

» IAHRS

hair transplant surgeons

» The Bald Truth

» Recent Threads

1800 graft repair case results by Dr. Lindsey
Yesterday 08:38 AM
Last Post By Dr. Lindsey
Yesterday 08:38 AM
Navigating the German Job Market as a Kenyan Citizen
11-04-2023 06:31 AM
Last Post By Keegan212
Yesterday 03:51 AM
DR HAKAN DOGANAY/ 4500 GRAFTS / Implanter Pen+FUE
03-26-2024 04:15 PM
Last Post By Hakan Doganay, MD
03-26-2024 04:15 PM
The Mane Event for Thursday, June 15th, 2023
06-15-2023 02:59 PM
Last Post By gisecit34
03-26-2024 08:05 AM
Sun Exposure after Hair Transplant
02-26-2009 02:36 PM
Last Post By gisecit34
03-25-2024 08:24 PM