Well, I haven't read all the threads there, but I consider that it is just an opinion of several women. As about the suggestion to divorce, may it is the correct one, because a woman who discusses her husband online and shares her negative feelings towards her partner with absolutely unknown people, is not likely to love him. I think that in this particular case, the problem is not in his baldness, but in the initial absence of love.
Originally Posted by fred970
Moreover, I think it is just a way to clear herself.
That is a disgusting lie. Confidence is a byproduct of predictability. No woman EVER has said 'I want to sleep with that guy because he's confident'.
Originally Posted by DAVE52
It's ALL about looks.
This is an interesting discussion we've got going here. I can see everyone's points to a certain agree, although I do not agree with the simple "confidence" part. Confidence needs to stem from something, a person cannot simply be confident for no reason. And in today's increasingly aesthetic society, a person's outer looks are going to matter first and foremost, and will always be the primary factor. Of course, inner qualities will matter once a relationship progresses, but outer looks are what "gets you in the door" and causes that initial attraction that ultimately leads to a relationship. And having a full head of hair is just so integral to a person's outer appearance, a completely difference-maker. Also, a woman's need for physical attraction to her mate never goes away and I guess that is why that woman (no matter how much of an idiot she is) on that loveshack site that Fred linked is starting to look elsewhere. And quite honestly, I would feel terribly awkward if I was in a relationship with a woman who liked me for my kindness and generosity but was not attracted to me physically.
All of this kind of contributes to my dilemma as well. I've been a muscular weight-lifter for a long time and on paper, I'd be the ideal guy who could pull off the shaved head/bad-ass look. But I just cannot bring myself to do it. Despite my size, I am not the most self-assured guy and although I am already depressed due to hair loss, I feel that shaving my head would magnify my depression tenfold.
James, you are right though. Although outer looks really are the primary determining factor, other things do matter. I used to be on a dating website and one girl on there mentioned that she wanted a "bad boy with a good heart". I really feel like that describes me to a T. Although I look intimidating due to my size, and I love rocking out at my metal shows with my long hair, I still always took pride in performing kind gestures for women, showing them my sensitive side, and treating them with kindness and respect. But still, those are all really complementary and secondary things though. Outer looks are still first and foremost. Sometimes I try and convince myself that even if I do shave my head, that I can still get women through my size and muscles. Women do like that sense of security of being with a guy that can protect them, I've had several tell me that in the past but I just cannot bring myself to do it.
Yet I just cannot bring myself to do it, due to some the points I have alluded to in this post.
Lastly, with all due respect, is your hair really that bad, James? I've seen cases of people who have had premature hair transplants yet they still retain a ton of hair.
Last edited by DepressedByHairLoss; 09-21-2015 at 11:57 PM.
There have been times I've walked into a club and had a girl come up to me, ask me to dance just because I "stood tall". I'm 34, balding, terrible hairline and yet every single time I go out I have women around me. Why, because I talk to them, make them laugh and of course... Buy them drinks. Lol. I have a 25 year old girl that calls me every now and then to hook up. She's very cute, double D's and yet chooses me over guys with NW1's.
Originally Posted by hellouser
Confidence is crucial. The way you walk, talk and compose yourself draws women to you. Hang your head, feel sorry for yourself because you're not a model and girls can sense your weakness.
I wish I had a full head of hair and will continue to work towards having hair again but won't be living on the sidelines just because I'm balding.
An experience I had; dancing with a girl at a club, got her to come home with me because I TOLD her with CONFIDENCE we were going to **** tonight. She said no at 1st but I told her, YES we are and guess who got laid that night... Yep, me!
You must be a white guy living in an Asian country. This never happens to me or anyone I know.
Originally Posted by Vic
Women doesn't "sense" weakness. That's just BS. She senses and clearly sees good looks and good genes.
Do you think all of us are walking with our head down mumbling "Hello, will you like me please?!" to every woman out there?
Confidence can make things easier if you've already attracted women as a bald man and can reproduce the results constantly enough.
As hellouser said, it's a product of predictability. What if those successes never happens? You can't just become confident out of the blue.
You're not even bald, you just have a receding hair line. Wait until you're bald.
I'm not bald, but horrible uneven hairline which is almost as bad as being bald. But I do look good with a buzzed head. People have told me I actually look better now then when I had hair so you have a point.
Originally Posted by fred970
The reason that never happens to you is your personality Fred.
I'm white living in Los Angeles, one of the most vein cities on Earth. But even girls here can sense a guy's confidence.
Our basic instincts drive us and girls are looking for an "Alfa" male so if you don't believe in yourself, guess what, it shows and girls DO SENSE it. It's a part of their basic instincts. To weed out the weak and reproduce with the strong. No matter their hairline.
Lots of girls will hook up because of looks but they'll also hook up because you are the "MAN".
Confidence is simple, just don't care what others think of you. That's it. Especially someone you've never met and most likely will never see again. That's all it takes to be confident.
An example; after work one day I went to a party. I was in my suit and tie. A girl walked up to me and said "I like your fashion sense, I just finished fashion school in Europe but you need to lose the tie clip, that's out of fashion". I laughed in her face and said "WOW your parents spent all that money on you and you don't even know clip ties are in fashion!?!"
She was shocked but her friends laughed and yes, she liked me even after I made a fool of her, probably more so.
@Vic you are so right! Thanks for your comments. I'm pleased to find out that someone else has the same opinion about the importance of self-confidence.
They can see my personality just by looking at me. Right. Because girls have sex with your personality.
Originally Posted by Vic
What are your stats? How many lays, how many make-outs, how many dates? No one gives a f-ck about girls looking at you.
This doesn't mean anything. What's next, you're going to brag about how many phone numbers you got?
That's cute. Have you f-cked her?
Originally Posted by Vic
We're talking about sex only here, that's what most men will care about.
You know who else likes confident people? Everyone! That doesn't mean these women were wetting their panties over you.
Stop being delusional. Only looks will matter when it comes to sexual attraction. Confidence isn't worth jack.
I'm not bragging, I'm trying to help these younger guys. Your entire mentality is wrong if you believe you're not good enough for women if you don't get laid the moment you meet a girl.
One night stands almost never happen. The girl has to either be a complete slut or you need to be a 9-10.
The way it works in the real world(outside your narrow minded view of social behavior) is you meet a girl and go out with her. Your personality keeps her coming back to you.
If you hit it off with a girl you meet, 1st date is usually just a date. If you are confident in yourself and make her laugh then you'll most likely get laid by the 3rd date. 2nd if she really likes you. And if she's a "Good girl" it could take months!
Basing your self worth on how many 1 night stands you have is by far the WORST, most childish immature way to gauge how girls feel about you.
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