giving it all up in 2 months

[gainspotter]

First I'd like to say this post is quite depressing, and I am depressed at the moment. I'm constantly thinking about my hair, and its been this way for years, viciusly spiralling into a mental problem. As soon as I get a glimpse of my bulbous forehead in a car window I feel like my heart has been pulled from my chest and stamped on.
This is where the ocd kicks in, and I start to check in the mirror, making sure every strand is where I want it to the point where I think 'my hairs not that bad actually' but I still won't be satisfied, so I take pictures at every angle.
One thing I've noticed is that mirrors lie, and photos are there to display the harsh reality in front of my eyes.
I am hideous!
I've never been blessed with looks, my head is larger than normal, and I have so many facial flaws I could fill a book (most of which cannot be worked on).
My hair was part of my persona, it gave an ugly face a bit of charisma, a bit of character, and now that is fading.
I'm sick of blaming genetics, the hair loss industry, and myself, so after I've seen out the dermarolling experiment I will be throwing my minoxidil in the bin, getting the doc to prescribe me some citallopram, and shaving my head bald.
I will try to adjust to a life where I will never have women, never have respect and deep down always resent the way I look.
I just can't live this way forever, I may as well throw in the towel and focus on trying not to care what I've become.
I wish all of you the best with this, just don't let it consume your life.