Sorry for all the questions

[Misery]

I hear you Misery - i've got an older bro who's 48 - hasn't lost a single hair from his head - loves calling me 'follically challenged' piss's me off deeply, hairloss hurts whatever age you are, if you care about your appearance.

Thanks, I feel for you. Even when I had a FULL head, in my 20s, I would never have joined in with other ignorant people when they mocked anyone who was losing their hair. You never know when it will strike, and its incredibly insensitive to anyone of any age

[mpb47]

Sadly, it is normal for males to have lost hair by the age of 40. What is even more sad is these young guys who think they are balding in their teens and twenties when in all reality most of them only have the natural and normal adult mature male hair line going on. What is even more sad than that is the fact that they guys convince each other that there is no such thing as the natural and normal adult mature male hair line. Then they waist their lives away worrying about it. So very sad.

I agree that it's starts to get more and more common @ 40+ but not sure I would go so far as to say it's normal.

As far as the mature hair thing, the problem is no one knows about it unless you read medical literature. My high school biology textbook talked about mpb but never about that. Only learned about it years later by reading lit at a medical library on campus.

Seems like some of the people here still don't believe it and then there is another group that goes to extreme measures to stop it- yes I have read that female hormones promote hairgrowth up front/temple areas but I sure wouldn't go that far to get my 15year old hair back!

[Tracy C]

I agree that it's starts to get more and more common @ 40+ but not sure I would go so far as to say it's normal.

I suppose that depends on how you define normal. Haha Most men I see who are over 40 have lost some hair. To me that defines the norm. From what I can see, the 30's is when it becomes more common, 40's is when it becomes normal and 50's is when it becomes typical. Very few males can escape it without taking medication to prevent it.

As far as the mature hair thing, the problem is no one knows about it unless you read medical literature. My high school biology textbook talked about mpb but never about that. Only learned about it years later by reading lit at a medical library on campus.

That's probably because the natural and normal adult mature male hair line is not MPB. Therefore it makes sense that it might not be discussed during discussions about MPB. The male hair line is a normal part of virilization - just like a deeper voice, bigger hands, bigger feet, body hair and facial hair..

Seems like some of the people here still don't believe it and then there is another group that goes to extreme measures to stop it- yes I have read that female hormones promote hairgrowth up front/temple areas but I sure wouldn't go that far to get my 15year old hair back!

They kind of don't have a choice - because it is as obvious as the sky is blue. The problem is they refuse to accept it for whatever reason - and yes they are taking extreme measures to prevent it that will feminize their bodies. Whether they believe that or not, it will happen in time.

[mpb47]

I suppose that depends on how you define normal. Haha Most men I see who are over 40 have lost some hair. To me that defines the norm. From what I can see, the 30's is when it becomes more common, 40's is when it becomes normal and 50's is when it becomes typical. Very few males can escape it without taking medication to prevent it.

Just curious as to what you define as normal loss (as in 40's)...do you mean just minor loss in front or more advanced like a spot developing in the back?

That's probably because the natural and normal adult mature male hair line is not MPB. Therefore it makes sense that it might not be discussed during discussions about MPB. The male hair line is a normal part of virilization - just like a deeper voice, bigger hands, bigger feet, body hair and facial hair..

If people knew it was normal, they would not freq out as much and think they will be bald in 5-10 years...so yea it should be discussed. Even mpb itself was discussed in my biology class though many did not believe our teacher, which kinda ticked her off. But hey when you are a teenager you think you are invincible and baldling only happened to old sick helpless people..least that is what our class thought back then.

They kind of don't have a choice - because it is as obvious as the sky is blue. The problem is they refuse to accept it for whatever reason - and yes they are taking extreme measures to prevent it that will feminize their bodies. Whether they believe that or not, it will happen in time.

Again if no one tells you about it..you think it is mpb so education or lack of is the problem. Hey I tried to fight it too as information was not as freeflowing in the pre internet age.

[drybone]

This has given me a great idea.

I will go get all the pics I got from my late teens, twenties , thirties and finally 40s .

Then at age 46 putting my foot down and getting a hair transplant.

I do feel fortunate to have kept my hair so long compared to other guys who lost it at age 20, but nonetheless we all have to come to a basic choice.

Get busy living

Or get busy dying.

After 6 years of 'mid life crisis' confusion, I have come out of it. I have decided that growing old may be inevitable, but looking and feeling old is optional. I am going to choose to do what I can to be healthy and happy.

[Tracy C]

Just curious as to what you define as normal loss (as in 40's)...do you mean just minor loss in front or more advanced like a spot developing in the back?

What I am seeing in most men in their 40's is a bit more loss in the temples than the natural and normal adult mature male hair line - and obvious thinning in the vertex over a larger area. For men in their 50's, I see a large well defined bald spot on the vertex.

If people knew it was normal, they would not freq out as much and think they will be bald in 5-10 years...so yea it should be discussed.

I agree. We try to inform young guys about it here, but these guys attack us like Nazi's at a book burning party.

[mpb47]

What I am seeing in most men in their 40's is a bit more loss in the temples than the natural and normal adult mature male hair line - and obvious thinning in the vertex over a larger area.

Darn..that is a pretty good guess...and would pretty much would describe me without meds. And even with them still look like that first thing in the morning before washing/combing.

I agree. We try to inform young guys about it here, but these guys attack us like Nazi's at a book burning party.

Maybe here on this site but on other sites I see people talking about it and knowing it is normal. Not just guys but girls too..

[Misery]

Everyone thinks they suffer alone, even when coming on to boards like this, and the truth of the matter is that we know it's a hugely common thing to go through, at any age. I feel for each and every one who goes through this, because at the end of the day, it's horrible. My point being, wrongly worded, obviously, is that when some suffer early on, they accept it, and i know a lot of people who look better without hair, I'm not one of those people. But I also know that there are 20 year olds out there hating their life as much as some of us, because of one thing. Losing their hair.... It was a security blanket. My hair has fallen out at a rate of knots, it hasn't been gradual, and the docs and derms were useless beyond useless!

I'm ashamed to admit, that i don't even turn a light on in the bathroom anymore when I go to bed, I clean my teeth in the dark, I can't stand to look at myself, Pathetic? Probably... but I'm not wanting to be like that. It makes me physically sick to look at myself now I'm patchy and have lost crown and appears to be going all over from front to back too. Some professors and shrinks out there will give me all the underlying bollox about it being a deeper problem, and that the hair is only a part of it. I can assure one and all, that if i had my hair back to what it was all those years ago, I would be far more confident, not stay in every day of my life and fortunately now work from home so don't have to see anyone.

My ex once saw one of her exs when we were out shopping, and he had lost a lot of his hair. Her reaction, which actually sickened me was 'Hah, look he's lost his hair, great!'. I suppose that kind of stuck with me too, that if she now saw me, she'd say the same thing. I'm not saying she's typical of women because she wasn't. She wasn't pleasant and when I started thinning at back, she made some shitty comments to me too and to her mates just to bash me down a bit more.

But, I digress.... Yes, it's sad and pathetic, but that's my life now, so you see kids.... it's not native to you, but us grown ups can be sad and pissed off too.

[mpb47]

Everyone thinks they suffer alone, even when coming on to boards like this, and the truth of the matter is that we know it's a hugely common thing to go through, at any age. I feel for each and every one who goes through this, because at the end of the day, it's horrible. My point being, wrongly worded, obviously, is that when some suffer early on, they accept it, and i know a lot of people who look better without hair, I'm not one of those people. But I also know that there are 20 year olds out there hating their life as much as some of us, because of one thing. Losing their hair.... It was a security blanket. My hair has fallen out at a rate of knots, it hasn't been gradual, and the docs and derms were useless beyond useless!

I'm ashamed to admit, that i don't even turn a light on in the bathroom anymore when I go to bed, I clean my teeth in the dark, I can't stand to look at myself, Pathetic? Probably... but I'm not wanting to be like that. It makes me physically sick to look at myself now I'm patchy and have lost crown and appears to be going all over from front to back too. Some professors and shrinks out there will give me all the underlying bollox about it being a deeper problem, and that the hair is only a part of it. I can assure one and all, that if i had my hair back to what it was all those years ago, I would be far more confident, not stay in every day of my life and fortunately now work from home so don't have to see anyone.

My ex once saw one of her exs when we were out shopping, and he had lost a lot of his hair. Her reaction, which actually sickened me was 'Hah, look he's lost his hair, great!'. I suppose that kind of stuck with me too, that if she now saw me, she'd say the same thing. I'm not saying she's typical of women because she wasn't. She wasn't pleasant and when I started thinning at back, she made some shitty comments to me too and to her mates just to bash me down a bit more.

But, I digress.... Yes, it's sad and pathetic, but that's my life now, so you see kids.... it's not native to you, but us grown ups can be sad and pissed off too.

One thing I was told many years ago by a 78-80 year old man. You will never like it but it will be easier to deal with the older you get. I still hate it but not as much as I did when I was younger so I think what he said was true.

And don't worry about the ex issue...this took me a long time to figure out, but sometimes that is their way of empowerment. I used to fall for it too till I figured out the reason behind it.

And 2 long time (30+) years female friends did it for the most crazy reasons of all....
Tracy often talks about guys trying to fight natural recession and how it is normal etc. But a few girls have hangups about natural things too.

Friend #1 has always said how mpb is normal/natural and guys should not waste time trying to fight it as it is not unattractive with the only exception being the combover. She went on about how her brother freqed out when he started receding and hoped I would not be like him. She worked for a Dr's office and knew about propecia when it was still called proscar. That is how I first learned about it. But anyway while she was telling me not to fight mpb when it came, at the same time was convinced she was a fat blob and was saving up 10--15K to have her thighs /boobs lipoed. She is hot yet thinks she is really fat and admitted to excercising to the point of exhaustion when she was younger to try to avoid getting fat.

Friend # 2 issue is being a tomboy even at 35+ Even wore straps as a kid to keep her boobs from growing. To her , having boobs is the equivalent to us having mpb as crazy as that sounds. Has brought up my hair several times saying a spot in the back would be the next thing to happen and has pointed out several other guy friends when they first started balding. One guy made the mistake of saying she needed a bra and that sent her off the deep end for months.... Will most likely see her tonight and probably won't say a word about hair as long as noone mentions her boobs


So even people that appear fine can have hangups too

[Misery]

I don't think I'm settled enough or happy enough for the not bothering thing to kick in yet, and it's harder when you find yourself single in the latter part of 40, probably after being in relationships for all those years.

But... I do get your point, and in particular the second one, on an opposite scale. This same girl I mentioned was paranoid beyond paranoid about her flat chest, but I told her it really didn't bother me at all, and it really didn't, at all, and thinking about this now, she could pad-out till her hearts content, and it was on the inside, if you get my drift, the hair thing is more in your face, in every day life than that. I'm not blaming her for my paranoia, although her behaviour to some poor b'stard losing his hair, probably didn't help the way I felt and thought. But I would never have dreamed of making comment about her hang ups, or weaknesses, and yet she used mine against me.

And.. here's another thing to think about, here in the UK, we have many cases of women getting breast enlargement on the NHS because they're so depressed by their small busts, but if a guy has a hang up about his baldness it doesn't work the same way. Any idea why? Not the ladies fault of course, but it does seem to sway in their favour a tad more, like our vanity doesn't count?