I don't enjoy doing most things any more

[AFye]

Yesterday I went out to eat with my family and friends. At the restaurant there were lots of goodlooking people everywhere. I felt like I didn't fit in at all And at 160 5'10 I'm not Jacked or big or anything like that. Maybe for 17 years old I'm big with all the scrawny emo and hippster kids.

Taking pictures is the worst part. I look weird and standout in pictures. I really look wierd because my facial features are young not mature. Also, my bald head reflects light and makes me standout in the middle of the crowd. I just want to fit in and look normal. Being bald and skinny looks horrible. fuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkk.

[clandestine]

Education.

[Scientalk56]

Let me tell you something,
in my first year in college, when i lived in dorms, i had many partners, one of them was bald, all the others were hairy, good looking guys including me.
But he lived every minute of everyday, he celebrated, he was hanging out with a lot of hot girls, he just lived his life more than anyone. (he was a good student too)
he started balding when he was 15 years old, but this thing did not hit his confidence, his was confident more than anyone, happier and a successful student.
at this time, i knew that i was balding, but seeing him was a joy to me (while everyone else envied him lol).. yeah i don't like baldness either, but hey, we live just once. so don't be a ***** and live your life.
a cure maybe will come, and maybe not. untill then you should live every minute.

[AlexPetra]

I couldn't agree more with you Scientalk56. I understand it when a 17 year-old guy wants to fit in but I believe the most important thing, AFye, is to feel good with yourself and have a strong self-confidence. That is going to make you standout in the middle of the crowd but in a very very pleasant way!

[AFye]

Let me tell you something,
in my first year in college, when i lived in dorms, i had many partners, one of them was bald, all the others were hairy, good looking guys including me.
But he lived every minute of everyday, he celebrated, he was hanging out with a lot of hot girls, he just lived his life more than anyone. (he was a good student too)
he started balding when he was 15 years old, but this thing did not hit his confidence, his was confident more than anyone, happier and a successful student.
at this time, i knew that i was balding, but seeing him was a joy to me (while everyone else envied him lol).. yeah i don't like baldness either, but hey, we live just once. so don't be a ***** and live your life.
a cure maybe will come, and maybe not. untill then you should live every minute.

I wish it was that easy man, but if I see my reflection in the window or mirror I become depressed. Also I'm naturally shy so its hard for me to be confident and extroverted. I would say I've made some progress lately. I just feel horrible. even the scrawny hipsster/emp kids who starve themselves can get girls. It makes me feel like shit.

[ChrisM]

I wish it was that easy man, but if I see my reflection in the window or mirror I become depressed. Also I'm naturally shy so its hard for me to be confident and extroverted. I would say I've made some progress lately. I just feel horrible. even the scrawny hipsster/emp kids who starve themselves can get girls. It makes me feel like shit.

I will admit there were some years where I felt exactly as you did but once I started going to the gym and lost the flab and put on muscle. The pretty girls in the bar started to put their hands on my head to start a conversation with me.

When I worked at a store once a young woman once told me that bald black men were incredibly sexy and if she got me home she would massage me and oil my head with her bare breasts.



I did not take her up on the offer but suffice to say there are points and deficits in life for everything. Baldness can work in your favor if you own it and it does not own you. The you with hair based on the extreme nature of condition might come back or might never come back. This is you today what you see in the mirror and every day after.


This is the new Afye..now you will have to redefine who you are as least as how you feel about your appearance so that you can emotionally survive and eventually come to terms down the road with this major bump in the road.
You are not a paraplegic. You are not an amputee. You are not an albino or someone with leukemia or cancer or full blown AIDS..nothing terminal. it is no less traumatic for one so young but the perspective is you are not dying and you have not lost your ability to walk, grasp objects or chew solid food.
I believe you are strong enough and you will survive this bullshit.

[AFye]

I will admit there were some years where I felt exactly as you did but once I started going to the gym and lost the flab and put on muscle. The pretty girls in the bar started to put their hands on my head to start a conversation with me.

When I worked at a store once a young woman once told me that bald black men were incredibly sexy and if she got me home she would massage me and oil my head with her bare breasts.



I did not take her up on the offer but suffice to say there are points and deficits in life for everything. Baldness can work in your favor if you own it and it does not own you. The you with hair based on the extreme nature of condition might come back or might never come back. This is you today what you see in the mirror and every day after.


This is the new Afye..now you will have to redefine who you are as least as how you feel about your appearance so that you can emotionally survive and eventually come to terms down the road with this major bump in the road.
You are not a paraplegic. You are not an amputee. You are not an albino or someone with leukemia or cancer or full blown AIDS..nothing terminal. it is no less traumatic for one so young but the perspective is you are not dying and you have not lost your ability to walk, grasp objects or chew solid food.
I believe you are strong enough and you will survive this bullshit.

You lost your hair when you were a grown man. You're also black so you were probably bigger than I am now before you even started lifting weights. It will be years of weightlifting before I am considered attractive by women unless I take a short cut. And you comparing me to people who have it worse is a fallacy because there are people who have it way better. Everything you told me is nice and all. I agree women find bald men attractive. however, you either have to spend years lifting weights or go on steroids.

[ChrisM]

You lost your hair when you were a grown man. You're also black so you were probably bigger than I am now before you even started lifting weights. It will be years of weightlifting before I am considered attractive by women unless I take a short cut. And you comparing me to people who have it worse is a fallacy because there are people who have it way better. Everything you told me is nice and all. I agree women find bald men attractive. however, you either have to spend years lifting weights or go on steroids.

You are probably too young to remember Lyle Alzado.. the professional football player dead because of steroids and he regretted taking them. There are no shortcuts.. corrections there are shortcuts but usually the price they exact is higher than most are willing to pay. Best to put in the work and get jacked with sweat equity the hard regular way.

[AFye]

You are probably too young to remember Lyle Alzado.. the professional football player dead because of steroids and he regretted taking them. There are no shortcuts.. corrections there are shortcuts but usually the price they exact is higher than most are willing to pay. Best to put in the work and get jacked with sweat equity the hard regular way.

Speak for yourself. I'm not going to wait until my 20s before women start giving me any attention.

[BigThinker]

If you can't live a young, crazy life because your appearance alienates you or you are alienating yourself, you might as well pursue an education. People on here rant about how depression causes them to drop out of school, quit their job, ruin their relationships, etc. and I agree it is a deterrent. But, you may as well pursue something worthwhile and invest in your future, because that's what a good education requires and pays dividends ultimately.

[AFye]

If you can't live a young, crazy life because your appearance alienates you or you are alienating yourself, you might as well pursue an education. People on here rant about how depression causes them to drop out of school, quit their job, ruin their relationships, etc. and I agree it is a deterrent. But, you may as well pursue something worthwhile and invest in your future, because that's what a good education requires and pays dividends ultimately.

I'm depressed at home. At work/school I do alright so I won't be quiting or dropping out. The only time I don't feel depressed outside those two places is at the gym.

[BigThinker]

I'm depressed at home. At work/school I do alright so I won't be quiting or dropping out. The only time I don't feel depressed outside those two places is at the gym.

Well, you're going to be successful in life then. The family s**t comes later in life for some us, myself included.

[ChrisM]

Speak for yourself. I'm not going to wait until my 20s before women start giving me any attention.

Good luck man.. even if I was scrawny which I am not.. I wouldn't take something that could potentially kill me for someone to glance at me just for lust who wouldn't give a shit about me otherwise for anything more meaningful.

[Scientalk56]

Baldness is not easy, specially in school, but after school there is a whole life in front of you. i know you would think like, "i wont wait till i finish school", but time flies..
when i was in school with full head of hair, i did nothing in life, n-o-t-h-i-n-g. There are depressed people with perfect hair, do you know why? because they take their hair for granted. because they're depressed over other stuff.

You can be always depressed, if it's not for hair, it would be for something else. you should be happy that the worst thing in your life is hair, and you should keep it that way. because there are much worse things in life, maybe you wont see this now, but you will sometime and you will appreciate what you have.

Also, when you will have a gf, eventually you will stop worrying about hairloss. and yes there are hairy lonely people. yeah..

So live you life, dont waste it on thinking too much..

[dex89]

Give it time and it will work itself out, trust me. I myself was anti social during my high school years. I never had a girl because i was to shy, never went to parties. I was still a virgin, always in my room playing nintendo. Once I hit 18 after high school, I started working out, 2 years later i got jacked. Had my first relationship, lost my virginity and a new me came out. I'm 23 years old have slept with MANY attractive ladies...give it time, be patient.