Girlfriend knocked my confidence

[jonnykino]

So, after posting numerous threads and pictures on here, various hair forums, and balding blogs, I was pretty convinced, and happy, that I was a perfect head of hair. I have a natural parting from my crown, and my hair is in-between juvenile and mature without any thinning. So in essence, a good head of hair, and I shouldn't worry. I haven't been.

... until yesterday. I got out the shower, and my hair was slicked back. I walked into the bedroom, and my girlfriend said "ohhh, don't wear your hair like that ever, you look like a 90 year old man". I asked her what she mean, and she replied "it kind of looks like a receding hairline".

AND NOW HERE COMES THE ANXIETY.

[PatientlyWaiting]

Yes, GF's can really knock your confidence down. My ex GF from 2008-2009 told me a bunch of times I look better with a hat on. Ouch. She would always comment on my hairloss. I currently don't have a GF and don't want one. 1. Because i'm so focused in school, 2. I don't want to know what any girl thinks of my hairloss, I already know it's terrible, I live it with it every day. No need to remind me. This is the same with friends too, I don't like hanging out with them because all they do is bring up my hairloss. This results in me not hanging out with anyone or going out anywhere except for school.

[NotBelievingIt]

how old were these girls? Sounds like 21.

[Alf]

Yes, GF's can really knock your confidence down. My ex GF from 2008-2009 told me a bunch of times I look better with a hat on. Ouch. She would always comment on my hairloss. I currently don't have a GF and don't want one. 1. Because i'm so focused in school, 2. I don't want to know what any girl thinks of my hairloss, I already know it's terrible, I live it with it every day. No need to remind me. This is the same with friends too, I don't like hanging out with them because all they do is bring up my hairloss. This results in me not hanging out with anyone or going out anywhere except for school.

I f you hinbk about you hair loss all the time, why care if your firends bring it up:-) Kidding, but don't isolate you from your friends that was what I did and it is hard to get new friends.

To OP, hopefully your gildfriend saw your reaction and wont come with the same remark again. Guess not all girls realice that also guys can get hurt by comments on looks. She would probably never tell a girl that she had gaindes om weight or that she had gotten som wrinkles.

[stratofortress]

Nah, just sounds like you have a high hairline. She might just have thought of the slicked back as an 'old man' presidential style. I remember your pics man, your hair is in good shape.

[PatientlyWaiting]

The age of the girls don't matter. It could be an 18 year old girl, or a 32 year old woman. Age is so overrated.

I don't think bout my hair loss in a positive way, I think about it in a negative way and how it's ruined my life. When your "friends" make fun of it, that doesn't feel too good. I have about 4 friends I can hang out with who do not care to talk about my hairloss.

[beatinghairloss]

This may shock you but dealing with hair loss is a gift not a curse. Most people never even consider it and lack the emotions necessary to empathize for someone in the situation. Before I began losing my hair I hung around people that were well on their way to Norwood 3, 4, or 5 and only looking back at photos do I even realize they were balding. Most people are completely oblivious. Losing my hair sent me down the same plummeting spiral of insecurities as the next guy but I raised out of it a way better person. I am happy and although I don’t have a boyish hair line anymore it has not moved in years and that confidence is enough for now. If you were super rich, super good looking, and had no medical problems I promise you would be much less happy then you are now. Life is a test not a race. It’s an opportunity not a gift. Make the most of it.

[beatinghairloss]

The age of the girls don't matter. It could be an 18 year old girl, or a 32 year old woman. Age is so overrated.

I don't think bout my hair loss in a positive way, I think about it in a negative way and how it's ruined my life. When your "friends" make fun of it, that doesn't feel too good. I have about 4 friends I can hang out with who do not care to talk about my hairloss.

You never did comment on my post that squashed your age old belief Propecia was made for hair loss when in reality is was a medication designed to shrink the prostate.

[DepressedByHairLoss]

Man, some of these messages are really getting to me. PatientlyWaiting, that's absolutely terrible how your friends make fun of you for hair loss. That should never happen and in my opinion, if they were real friends, they would never say shit like that. Only a handful of my friends know about my hair loss issues but they would never say anything derogatory or hurtful to me about it. In fact, they've listened very compassionately and thoughtfully to me when I vent to them about hair loss, and they offer excellent advice. A few of them have very noticeable hair loss so I'm always there to listen to their frustrations as well. Friends should be there to help you through tough times, not make fun of you. I know that some people like to "bust balls", but hair loss is way too sensitive a topic to "bust balls" about.

Jonnykino, I can't see photos of your hair from your past posts because they've been removed. But if I remember correctly, you have a ton of hair and absolutely nothing to worry about. When I had just a receding hair line, I was with plenty of girls and none of them noticed or said anything about it. Hell, I even got compliments on my hair then and used to let girls style my long hair before we went out. Dude, young women talk out of their asses all the time and I guarantee you that like 99.9% of people wouldn't even notice any kind of hair loss on you at all (if I remember correctly from your photos). But I feel for you nonetheless man, that's really a stupid thing for a woman to say. I mean, if a guy makes a comment about a woman's weight, they oftentimes will go through the roof!!

[dda]

Girls have a ****ing habit of opening their mouths and saying dumb shit, its just their nature. Thats when you have to step in and say your ass looks a little flabby, or your tits are sort of sagging, or layoff the chocolate. something to make them even more self conscious then they really are lol.

But patiently waiting, I know what its like to hear that shit from certain friends. Hairloss is very sensitive indeed, but not to guys like them who don't have to worry about it in their 20s and 30s. I would love for them to wake up one day with a NW3 or very thin hair and see how they would react. would be priceless

[ravegrover]

I stopped hanging out wth "friends" too, during my mid 20s. I just couldnt bear it when they brought up hairloss. It killed me inside and ruined my entire day. Funny, people started to think I stayed away just because I was either arrogant or weird (no, just balding).
Gets easier as you get older and learn to accept and live wth hairloss.

[dex89]

So, after posting numerous threads and pictures on here, various hair forums, and balding blogs, I was pretty convinced, and happy, that I was a perfect head of hair. I have a natural parting from my crown, and my hair is in-between juvenile and mature without any thinning. So in essence, a good head of hair, and I shouldn't worry. I haven't been.

... until yesterday. I got out the shower, and my hair was slicked back. I walked into the bedroom, and my girlfriend said "ohhh, don't wear your hair like that ever, you look like a 90 year old man". I asked her what she mean, and she replied "it kind of looks like a receding hairline".

AND NOW HERE COMES THE ANXIETY.

Dam bro that sucks but don't take shit from her or anyone. If I was in your shoes, I would look at her and say " shut up or I'll replace you" That's what I said to my exes when they try to pick out one of my flaws.

I know how most of you guys feel too. Every time I messed up my hair and I have to buzz it off, I never see my friends or go clubbing for a week till it grows a inch longer because I'm afraid that they might say that my hairline is receding. Hair loss really sucks but It's the way of life and we got to treat it and deal with it.

[Morbo]

yeah, I hate when friends tell/suggest you stuff like "you should wear a hat or cap". Usually this even comes from guys who are like 26-34 years old.

They don't seem to understand that you just want to be content with the person you are and don't want to hide yourself.