Some Thoughts on Baldness

There are a lot of different opinions on this site regarding whether baldness represents the end of one's life. Having mixed feelings about it, and having a sometimes negative view of baldness myself, I would like to offer some objective thoughts.

There are those who think that all bald men are ugly. This is an absurd statement. Depending on your headshape, facial features and body, you can look good even if you are bald. I have heard a few very negative comments on this forum stating that baldness is just flat-out hideous looking. I agree that pretty much any guy will look better with hair;however, that does not mean that some guys don't look ok bald. There are plenty of guys out there who have full heads of hair and who are unattractive. There are a myriad of things, which technically, are physical flaws. Some guys are bald, or short, or ugly, or fat or have big noses or ears. Where does it end? In the end everything is relative.

There are men who are bald and are, despite their lack of hair, more attractive than most men who have hair. Would you rather be bald and in shape or fat with a full head of hair? People cite the likes of Billy Zane, Andre Agassi, Michael Stipe etc to underscore the notion that some bald men look decent. The list of good-looking bald men is longer than that. The French soccer star Zenedine Zidane, who is famous for head-butting an Italian player during the 2006 World Cup, happens to be an attractive bald guy. If you look at pictures or video of him before he buzzed his hair short, you will notice that he began balding at a young age. Shit happens. Zidane is better looking than most men even though he is bald. Baldness does not necessarily mean the end of things.

Some guys tell men who are bothered by their hairloss to "man up" and deal with it. Well, that's a stupid thing to say in general because each man's hairloss affects his appearance in different ways. Some guys look like aliens if they shave their heads;they truly look abnormal. For a guy who looks ok with no hair to say something like that is ignorant of some guys' situations. Using Propecia, Rogaine, wearing a hairpiece or having a tranny performed are better options for many fellas. There is a segment of the male population who like the "macho" look, so they have no problem shaving the dome. Many of us don't want to look macho, we want to look natural and attractive;furthermore, looking macho or "tough" doesn't prove anything. In our image and stereotype obsessed culture, people often judge others on their "image" even though "image" is make-believe.

One of the things that has given bald men a bad reputation is the bald man who decides not to groom himself. If you are a Norwood 5 or 6, and you grow your hair out long on the sides but have nothing on top, you will look like a clown. You know how the typical circus clown is bald on top but has an afro on the sides? That's the sort of thing that gave bald men a bad reputation to begin with. If every bald guy looked like Agassi, Zane, Zidane or Stipe then our perception as a society about bald men would be more favorable.

As a guy who began balding when I was 17, and who was a Norwood 6 by 21, I can say that there are no easy answers for self-acceptance. I spent $10,000 on hairpieces between the ages of 21 and 24. I think the stress that premature baldness gave me may have contributed to my decline in physical health. Personally, I know how important it is to stay positive and try to be happy in life. Life is too damn short to be miserable forever. It wasn't until I was in my late 20's that I finally began to accept my hairloss. For those fellas who are younger, I can say that it usually gets easier with age. In fact, the older I get the better I feel. I will look better at 40 than I do now at 33.

There is a famous psychologist who stated a study on human happiness in one of his books. Women were asked to rate their attractiveness and they were followed later on in life. The study found that there was no correlation between looks and happiness. In other words, the women who rated themselves as unattractive were no more likely to be unhappy than women who rated themselves as attractive. I suppose there are lessons to be learned from this study. There will be women who are not attracted to you because you are bald;so be it. There are also women who are not attracted to guys who are assholes, bald, short, big-nosed,smelly, poor, ugly etc. Personally, I'd rather be a good man than be an asshole. I'd rather be bald and in shape than fat with B-cup sized boobs like many men. None of us is perfect;the question, or rather task, is to find the inner strength to make the most out of what you were given. Now, that's easier said than done; however, life goes by quickly and there is no telling how long any of us have to live. Any of us could die in a car wreck. It's important to focus on the future and distract yourself from your misery.You may be bald but you may also be handsome, intelligent, athletic, artistic etc. Everyone has some sort of talent;find it, and run with it...

I am a 45-year-old female. Get this, guys: Women suffer from hair loss too. Hormonal shifts can create male pattern baldness in women, adding years to their looks. It wasn't until I discovered the correlation between a high glycemic diet and stress that I could finally solve my problem. It took me 18 months to grow a thick healthy head of hair again. I had to eliminate 80 percent of the food I was eating. I wish I could say I had good self-esteem when my hair fell out, but I just felt ugly and scared. Women lose their hair too, they're just too scared to talk about it.

By the way, my daughter's father is 38 years old. He was shaved when I met him eight years ago. He shaved his head because it was thinning. I was completely paralyzed by how attracted I was to him. He is truly one of the hottest men I've ever seen. Most bald men are hot.

A very balanced view on baldness.... well done for posting it.
Also, good input from a female that baldness can be very attractive!
I dont have a problem with men who decide to shave their heads, take medications or have a hair transplant. As long as that decision makes handling their baldness easier then im all for it.
Unfortunately, you do get certain people who will moan about anything - 'shaved heads look ugly', 'medications dont work', 'hair transplants look rubbish'. That kind of talk is not only false, but can make already miserable young men become depressed.

That is a great and very thoughful post Weedwacker, thanks.

"Would you rather be bald and in shape or fat with a full head of hair?"

Definitely fat with a full head of hair. You can burn off old fat, it just takes discipline. I myself managed to lose around 3 stones in as many months, simply because I was tired of being 'short, fat and bald' - the gruesome threesome. The 'fat' label was the only one that was possible to eradicate.

You can't become taller or grow new hair. It is currently impossible. I began losing mine at 19 and I'm now 26. I've been at Norwood 6 for about 4 years now. If what you say is true, it will hopefully get better with age.

I thought getting leaner and fitter would have helped more. It did initially, but then you realise people still put you in the 'lesser member of society' category. I put the weight on after I started losing my hair - emotional eating was a crutch I guess. But now I look exactly like I did 8 years ago when I had girls flirting all around me, except now the only difference is I have a shaved head (which unfortunately for me is one of those wonky shaped ones).

And guess what? No flirting girls. I used to have to barely bat an eyelid. Now I have to practically chloroform them. I guess I'm going to have to start hanging around people in 30's/40's bars :(

What I definitely want to say to you and everyone here is please don't waste any more money on 'treatments' until an actual scientifically-proven CURE for creating and nurturing new hair follicles is developed and released. There is currently no pill, cream, oil, wig or hair transplant in the world that will give you back the full head of hair you once had. I live in hope that there will be one day, but I'm an all or nothing kind of guy, and at the moment, I choose nothing.

This is my first post. Thanks for those that have read it, thanks for listening even though it may have been a tad on the pessimistic side ;)

P.S. I totally agree with the BS macho image thing. I was never one of those guys.

Thanks for the comments folks. You know, you can't please everyone. Here's something to add to the discussion:

Christiano Ronaldo is considered one of the sexiest men on the planet. He is one of the world's best soccer players. There was a picture posted of him wearing nothing but skimpy shorts and sandals. Women sent in there comments of his photo;half thought he was hot and some didn't. Some pointed out the fact that he shaves his legs(which he does for soccer)and they find that unappealing on a man. Some didn't like his sandals and shorts because they thought he looked "gay" in them. Now, Christiano Ronaldo looks like a greek statue;literally! He is ****ing ripped;lean and ripped. The muscle definition of his legs is insane;not to mention the veins because of his paucity of bodyfat. What is the moral of this? Well, women find many different things attractive;some of which is conditioned by the societies in which people are brought up. Much of the antipathy to baldness is cultural. Just as women wouldn't find men with clean-shaven faces attractive 5,000 years ago(because they woud have thought they looked feminine),women now(for the most part) are not attracted to ripped men with shaved legs. You really can't win, can you?

I think too many generalisations are made about baldness, especially by those who didn't have to start dealing with it by their teens or early 20s. I think those who began losing hair at an older age don't really understand the stigma; even if women in general didn't mind baldness, and to be honest most do, young women in their 20s are very unlikely to think the look is okay. The trouble is that it is a very conforming age, and bald men can't conform. They are, in short, abnormal.

Also, there is a hell of a lot of pressure on those of us in our 20s to adopt the Mr. Meatball head shave because it's the 'only fashionable option.' There is pressure on older men, but nothing like the pressure you get in your twenties. People with hair just make this assumption that it's the only acceptable option and therefore you're weird if you don't do it. No matter if you think it's the look from hell of course.

I have serious issues with shaving my head. Not only do I think shaved heads look crap, but I cannot justify the work involved. I currently get my hair cut once a month, it costs £10 and it takes 30 minutes. My thin hair looks incredibly crap and I certainly don't know anyone else as balding as me who doesn't shave their head, but in my opinion I'll look just as crap with a shaved head, albeit I'll be conformist crap instead of weird crap!

So, that's why I don't do it. The very idea of spending 10-15 minutes every day ****ing about with a razor on my head for a look I can't stand is absurd. That's something in the region of 90 hours a year, just to look like an egg.

Bottom line, I look crap but it's a crap look that takes zero effort. Shaved head is a crap look that takes a lot of effort. And that's why I don't do it.

Shaving my head takes me no longer than five minutes per day, not a big deal to me. Fixed by 35 - you are in the ideal position to try the shaved look..... with the lack of social contact. Might be worth a shot - dont knock it till youve tried it :)

Waste of five minutes. That's the irony; baldness seems to demand more hair care than any other style! Hair loss has already claimed my looks, I'll be damned if it takes my time as well.

Five minutes every single day? Just to look like an egg? Forget it.

Oh cmon fixed.....you may look good shaven......give it a try : )
I vote we start a petition to get fixed to shave his head.

I vote to be compassionate to one another and try to understand how somebody else feels about their hair loss. If you like a buzzed look great but if you aren't comfortable with it forget it.
Like I say, To each his own.

I vote to lighten up....

I am "lightened up" as you say. I am also respectful of peoples opinions.

As am i........ different opinions make for an interesting topic. It is one thing to have an opinion, quite another to promote your own thoughts as facts with no evidence to back them up. There are young people who use this forum, desperate to feel better about themselves. People who post negatively about any form of hair loss 'solution' only serve to send these youngsters further into depression.

I am stubbornly opposed to head shaving, petition or not. I don't have much hair left so frankly 30 minutes a month on cutting it seems more than adequate!

By the way, it's okay to be depressed about hair loss. Hair loss is very depressing. It's unhealthy to suppress your true feelings.

I don't think the petition to get "Fixed" to shave his head is going to work. I think there would be a greater chance of him shaving his balls than him shaving his head.

I agree that each guy needs to seriously sit down and contemplate his situation. There is no need to be in a rush about it. I am personally not a fan of head-shaving, but that's my opinion. I am more of a fan of buzzing the hair down to a #1 or #2 on the buzzer. I buzz mine to a #1. When I shave my head I feel unnatural and bizarre. I am also very white. Given my Northern European ancestry(Norwegian,Swedish,German,English,Irish,Sc ottish,Welsh), I don't tan very easily. I believe buzzing is more natural than shaving;furthermore, I begin to become obsessive about proportioning when I shave my dome. To me, it's abnormal to shave my head and then have bodyhair elsewhere;it just looks weird. I don't know why it's trendy to shave the head. Three-month-old babies are bald;therefore, why is it normal for a grown man to be bald? It's the same debate regarding man-scaping. Some people think it's abnormal for a guy to shave his chest;however, these same people think it's ok for a guy to shave his head? I don't get it.

I agree that we ought to be supportive of each other's decisions regarding baldness. I don't try to dissuade people from shaving or not shaving because it's their decision. I don't think it's helpful to say all bald men look like ass;conversely, I don't think it's good for the militant types to say"man up and shave your head!" This isn't the Army. Going bald is traumatic and whatever a bloke has to do to feel comfortable is acceptable.

I have accepted the fact that I am bald. Once I hit 30 everything got better for me psychologically. There is a difference between acceptance and satisfaction. I am not satisfied being bald because I look less attractive. Just because I accept it doesn't mean I like it. Some guys shave their heads because they are in denial, but some do it because they look better shaved than with the scraggly-looking, overgrown horseshoe. I was an emotional trainwreck when I was say, 23. That was just too young do deal with this shit. If I was 20 again, I would probably wear a piece. Acceptance came with age. It's more acceptable to be a full Norwood in your 30's than 20's. Unlike most people, I actually look forward to aging.

The petition to get fixed to shave his head was a joke.....The seriousness around here gets a little tedious after a while.

I know the petition was a joke;that's why I mentioned the ball-shaving thing for the sake of being jocular.

Something needs to be clarified regarding bald celebrities:they are not a good example of a role model for balding guys. They are rich and famous. There was a post by a woman on this forum which stated that Andre Agassi and Michael Stipe look handsome bald;however,you'll also notice she went on to say that Agassi is a great athlete and Stipe has that rock star thing going on. This underscores my point;women don't care about looks when you have status and wealth. Most of us are not famous and rich.

There are two types of men in this world:the men who want to look attractive and natural, and those who want to look like an ex-con gang member. If you are the guy who just wants to get attention by riding around on a Harley and intimidate people all day, then balding is irrelevant to you. If you are the guy who wants to look natural, then balding is a completely different animal. I'm not one of those fellas who shaves his head, has a beer-belly, 20 tattoos and a goatee grown down to his balls. There is a specific reason those guys go out of their way to have that "look". If I was one of those guys, I wouldn't stop there;I would wear a bronze viking helmet with horns.

There are bald men who look good with no hair or a shaved head despite their lack of naturality;for instance, Zenedine Zidane or Stefano Garzelli. Most guys do not look very good without hair and there's a good reason for that:it's unnatural. I'll ask this question:how many people(male or female) look good on chemotherapy? I haven't seen any;they look sick. The reason being that hair is an integral part of your body. I take a chemotherapy drug for my auto immune illness which, thankfully, doesn't make my remaining hair fall out. The drug may cause hepatitis or rot my liver, but those are rare side-effects. Some guys can go bald and look good despite their lack of a hair-frame, but that's not the norm.

Neither were bald when they became famous. Nor were a great many of the so called examples.

Can anyone name me a single actor who went bald at 20 but was still successful, without wearing wigs?

give it a rest already fixed. its getting old. we get it. you hate balding and think its ugly. good for you. continuing to whine and cry about it on a message board isnt going to change a thing for you.

And there was me thinking you'd thought of an example. The very idea of someone like you thinking is, of course, preposterous.

please get professional help asap.

Why would I need to? Apart from baldness, there's nothing wrong with me. Just because I have a sharper sense of reality than you doesn't mean I should be put on some sort of happy pills.

Just for the sake of argument.....Steve Austin was an average wrestler with hair......then he shaved bald and became one of the biggest stars the industry has ever known.
Its ok though, i fully expect fixed to say he doesnt count....even though wrestling is nearer to entertainment than a sport :)

Weedwacker - i think the comparison with chemotherapy patients is a poor one. As far as im aware chemotherapy takes all your hair.....so no eyebrows, lashes, stubble......add to that you lose weight and colour drains from your face.
A bald man can have stubble, eyebrows, lashes, a tan... and have a good physical weight. So i think the two things are far removed from each other.

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Originally Posted by jooder

Just for the sake of argument.....Steve Austin was an average wrestler with hair......then he shaved bald and became one of the biggest stars the industry has ever known.
Its ok though, i fully expect fixed to say he doesnt count....even though wrestling is nearer to entertainment than a sport :)

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Just so you know. Most of the time that is not the case.

Just so you know, just for the sake of argument. I don't like that reasoning.


Just so you know.

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Originally Posted by KeepTheHair

Just so you know. Most of the time that is not the case.

Just so you know, just for the sake of argument. I don't like that reasoning.


Just so you know.

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Poor lad :)

I just hate it when people exercise poor logic like that.


There will always be such an example. Stop using it already.

^^^^wow^^^^^

Keep the hair - Ok, whenever there is an example which contradicts your theory..... i will not post it. Thats a really good idea. Your wasted on this site :rolleyes:

Jooder, there is no doubt that "Fixed" has contradicted himself more than once. First, he said that hair is not necessary for a person to look good, and then he said that all bald men are ugly. Then, he said that life was just bearable with hair, but then he said that he would be happy and all would be great with hair. Then, he said there are no bald men who are successful out of the sports arena;however, that is false. Steve Ballmer became the CEO of Microsoft as a full Norwood, and he doesn't shave his head. Ben Bernanke is the head of the U.S. Treasury and he is a full Norwood;and no, he doesn't shave his head. There are around a dozen U.S. Governors who are bald, not to mention senators and reps. Of course, there are many more examples which he clearly doesn't want to acknowledge. One of his points is valid:no actor in Hollywood became successful as a bald 20 year old, and no one ever will.

Steve Austin is not a good example because, in my opinion he is a juicehead. That isn't my opinion just because of his ex-wife's allegations. Furthemore, pro wrestling is a circus show which does not pertain to reality.

Actually, the chemo reference seems valid to me. Many guys who shave their heads look sick even though they have eyebrows;however, some can pull it off. There are people who are undergoing chemotherapy who get fake eyebrows but that doesn't do much to help. I just don't think it is accurate for people to say that ALL bald guys look horrible because it's not true.

I don't think that "Fixed" trying to impose his viewpoints on young bald guys and ridicule them is healthy because many come here for support. On the other hand, some guys try to bully balding men into shaving their heads in order to follow a machismo trend. In the 1980's, a guy would have been considered a skinhead or freak for shaving his head, but now it's a trend. When I began balding around 1992-93, I buzzed my head and went to high school like that. I was ridiculed and mocked for it;however, now it's more acceptable.

Seeing as we are supposed to have hair on our heads, shaving makes me feel sick. I am too pale to shave and that's why I need some stubble on my head;furthermore, I will not shave my head in order to surrender. Nature has taken it's course and I will not allow my MPB to force me to shave to deny the damage.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by jooder

Keep the hair - Ok, whenever there is an example which contradicts your theory..... i will not post it. Thats a really good idea. Your wasted on this site :rolleyes:

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First of all. I don't have a theory or whatever.


There will always be some bald guy with success out there. That does not change the fact that in most cases and most of the time:

Balding makes you less attractive.
Screws your confidence
and all the million other reasons it sucks.


So, what is the point in saying "uh uh uh but that 1 guy got success?" that is the point? Really? Whats the point.


That has just gotten really old and stupid on these boards and I don't even blame Fixed for being so annoyed every time it comes up because really...there is simply no point. Are you trying to make yourself feel better or something?


If I could be Steve Austin instead of myself, I would NOT. EVER.


But to me this post is just extremely retarded:

'Just for the sake of argument.....Steve Austin was an average wrestler with hair......then he shaved bald and became one of the biggest stars the industry has ever known.
Its ok though, i fully expect fixed to say he doesnt count....even though wrestling is nearer to entertainment than a sport'





Saying that is unbelievably stupid. Do you think Daniel Radcliffe would still have gotten his role in Harry Potter if he had the horse shoe or shaved head look? No.


There are a lot more examples like that then the one very crap example you put out. Wrestlers are meat heads. I don't want to be one. Not even if it means I can be rich and whatever.

I can tihnk of a lot of movies and series where if the guy didn't have such good hair, he most certainly would NOT have gotten the part.


Your logic sucks and it's really annoying.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KeepTheHair

Saying that is unbelievably stupid. Do you think Daniel Radcliffe would still have gotten his role in Harry Potter if he had the horse shoe or shaved head look?

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Daniel Radcliffe was cast as Harry Potter when he was 11. Do you really think there are 11-year-olds exhibiting male pattern baldness, or are you just pretending to be stupid?

Dude, I can think of plenty other more appropriate examples. Your the idiot.

That just happen to come to mind. Sure it wasn't the best example. BUt if you don't see my point I don't see why I should be explaining to someone dumb how dumb he is. Thats dumb.


Your dumb.

Steve Austin is a laughably bad example to give to a 27 year old finance professional who thinks that wrestling is a childish form of entertainment for closet gay rednecks who like to look at scantily dressed meathead men. Being placed under the impression that I am moving closer toward the likes of Steve Austin being a role model truly makes me want to crawl under a rock and die.

As for the Harry Potter example, does anyone believe he wouldn't have been re-cast if he lost his hair before the final film? He wouldn't be the first Harry Potter actor to go on to fail in Hollywood because of baldness; Ian Hart (who you will seldom see without a hat on) saw movie exec after movie exec in Hollywood after appearing in the first Harry Potter movie only to eventually be told to leave Hollywood because there were no roles for a bald guy. Hart, by the way, is one of Britain's finest actors.

Actually, logically you'd think bald guys would suit acting quite well because their real hair wouldn't get in the way when the director wanted a very particular look. You could just slap on the right wig and run with it. Hollywood is stupid isn't it?

Fixed had previously said that any bald man who is successfull became so before he went bald. He said he didnt know of any bald man who became famous/ successfull after they went bald........so i gave an example of one -Steve Austin. Steve Austin is also an actor as well as a wrestler.......obviously not everybody's favourite person but it proved a point.
'Keep the hair' seems to have a problem when people argue against his and 'fixed by 35s' posts. He cant understand the logic behind it.
Heres the logic :

Young men visit this forum very depressed about things.........if there was just the 'bald is ugly, grotesque and your a loser' argument around here, they would leave even more depressed....and over time perhaps some may become suicidal.
So thats why i post the opposing argument..... and also because i actually believe in what im saying!
There are plenty of sucessfull, attractive bald men.........there are also ones who arnt. There are hair loss treatments that work. I also believe some hair transplant drs are good at what they do. Its not for me.....but why rubbish it?
Above all, there are options for people visiting this site. You can shave your head and may look good doing that. Its worth a try to some people who think they may benefit from it. You can get on medications and have a good chance of saving much of your hair..........or you can get a hair transplant. You can even do a combination of things.
I believe thats a truthful and responsible message to put out........and when i see people rubbishing a 'solution' unjustly then i will post my opinion.

Thats the logic :)

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so i gave an example of one -Steve Austin. Steve Austin is also an actor as well as a wrestler

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You are kidding me? Austin acts? No, wait. Austin can talk legibly without people thinking he's a caveman? As a Brit, I wasn't aware of this, and now I will have to scour Youtube for the best laugh in years.

By the way, there is a young man who went bald and became a famous actor; Patrick Stewart. Of course, he had to wear a wig and, personally, I feel he didn't get the parts that merited his ability (but then I think Star Trek is shit).

I dont really have much of an opinion on Steve Austin one way or another........but he seems the subject of some ridicule here.......... yet you all know him and his character pretty well, even without his acting. Maybe your not as unfamiliar with his wrestling as you portray ;)

There was this kid at school who just wouldn't shut up about him. We had to bog flush him in the end, we were left with no other choice.

I believe you ;)