Guys who start losing hair in their lates 30s and 40s

Lets just first say im 19 years old dealing with hairloss. I just find that when guys come on this forum dealing with hairloss in their lates 30s 40s its mind boggling. I understand we all want to look good at any age but i find that its more acceptable for a guy that age to lose his hair without being ashamed of it. I love that guy joe from staten island and all but i found it crazy that he is 50 years old and can't get over hairloss by now. He has a wife and kids who love him, who else does he have to impress. I just find that if your married have have kids, its easier to get over hairloss. You should devote your life to your kids and maybe the setbacks you had in your life because of hairloss you try to live out through them. It just pisses me off when guys who are older complain about hairloss, when its really the younger guys who are the true sufferes. Maybe im just ignorant but i would like to know how an older guy whose married cant get over hairloss because it scares me when i get to that point, im hopeful i will be over hairloss. In my eyes the day i have my first son is the day i get over baldness.

You think men just stop caring about their appearance and their youthfulness when they turn 30? Think again. It's not all about getting women, most men actually care about their self image for their own sake. It is almost as difficult in your 30's as is it is in your 20's to see your youthfulness fading away. The only upside for men who lose hair later on is that they tend to lose hair much more slowly and not become as bald as guys who lose hair early on. They also tend to have more money to address the problem.

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Originally Posted by john2399

Lets just first say im 19 years old dealing with hairloss. I just find that when guys come on this forum dealing with hairloss in their lates 30s 40s its mind boggling. I understand we all want to look good at any age but i find that its more acceptable for a guy that age to lose his hair without being ashamed of it. I love that guy joe from staten island and all but i found it crazy that he is 50 years old and can't get over hairloss by now. He has a wife and kids who love him, who else does he have to impress. I just find that if your married have have kids, its easier to get over hairloss. You should devote your life to your kids and maybe the setbacks you had in your life because of hairloss you try to live out through them. It just pisses me off when guys who are older complain about hairloss, when its really the younger guys who are the true sufferes. Maybe im just ignorant but i would like to know how an older guy whose married cant get over hairloss because it scares me when i get to that point, im hopeful i will be over hairloss. In my eyes the day i have my first son is the day i get over baldness.

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Really? And when you have your first son - and you're bent over putting a DVD on, and he laugh's and say's in front of a room full of people "Daddy's got a bald patch" See how gut wrenched you feel about that. It ****in hurt me.

Yeah i feel for younger guy's very much. Drop the ignorance mate, if you give a **** about your self esteem and appearence - losing hair hurt's at any age.

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Originally Posted by ryan555

It is almost as difficult in your 30's as is it is in your 20's to see your youthfulness fading away.

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Disagree completely. The younger you are, the more ostracized you will be from your peers. Hair loss sufferers in their late teens and early twenties are indeed a minority. The same can not be said for older men. Sorry.

Not saying it isn't hard at any age, and I do agree with you that it will never be easy, regardless of age. All I'm saying is the younger you are, the less likely your hair loss will be accepted by peers and those around you. Young hair loss sufferers are not the norm.

I agree that the younger you are, the harder hair loss is to deal with. A friend of mine actually started losing his hair in high school and kids ridiculed him for it. I don't know how the hell I would be able to deal hair loss at that age!! I think baldness is much more acceptable to deal with later on in life because a lot more people deal with hair loss later on in life than they do earlier on. If you are a 50-year-old man and you are around other 50-year-old men, odds are that a good percentage of them will be dealing with hair loss so you won't feel ostracized and abnormal. But if you are a 20-year-old man, then odds are that most of your peers are not losing their hair, and that can make the 20-year-old think that they look ugly or abnormal. Plus, a 50-year-old man can look back and say that he lived for so many years without hair loss and can relish in the memories that he lived life as a young adult free and uninhibited by hair loss.
That being said though, hair loss can be devastating at any age. I'm 33 and I feel like hair loss is ruining my whole life, because I feel like my looks and my identity are being taken away from me. Hell, you even see plenty of guys in their 50's and 60's wearing wigs because they hate their hair loss. I have 2 close friends who do this. Lastly, I do have the utmost sympathy for Joe from Staten Island. I've listened to his story and not only did he start losing his hair early on, but he got butchered from a bad hair transplant so I'd bet he has noticeable scars and bumps on his head from the butchery of that transplant.

I hear you DepressedByHairloss & clandestine - i'd hate to have started losing my hair in my teen's, it would have been even more devastating ten fold, i don't doubt that for a minute.

But - i also get pissed off hearing younger guy's saying i shouldnt worry about it. Well, i do - and i alway's will. Luckily it's been a slow process for me - started around the age of 27, and hasn't been a rollercoaster ride to hell, but the ride is heading there - and you bet it concern's me.

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Originally Posted by john2399

It just pisses me off when guys who are older complain about hairloss, when its really the younger guys who are the true sufferes.

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Take a moment to step back and try to imagine what it would be like to be a woman who is dealing with hair loss. Would you still think it is the younger guys who are the true sufferers?

Everyone's situation is different and everyone’s ability to deal with their hair loss is different. Some people are more emotionally equipped to deal with hair loss than others.

completely agree with the poster. You are in your late 30s you lose your hair so what? Do you want a norwood 1 to get 19 year old hot girls?

Just shave it! It's the young ones who suffer the most, im only 23 and I was just planning a lot of things and they all went down the drain....i'll be a norwood 6 soon...imagine you late 30s guys being a norwood 6 at 25...yes...now move on be grateful that you enjoyed 20 years of hair in your life and shave it !!! what the hell did you want? look like ronald reagan and make it to past 100 with a full head of hair? haha pisses me right off guys...:mad:

Don't tell me I'd still be here if i was losing my hair at my late 30s....in fact most of us young ones would not have. Back then when i was a negative norwood i always said to people I wouldnt give a rat ass if i lost my hair in my 30s despite having no family history of baldness.:mad:

Oh and about joe, the guy was traumatized with hair loss since he was very young i think around 12.
That's why he is where he is at at 50 i suppose. He is a special case indeed. He never enjoyed a full head of hair in his 20s 30s. But I also think he should try to move on and open up his mind to the things he still has and be grateful for them.

love joe though :).

Wtf we can all disagree forever on this one. We've all got our own take on it.

If hairloss bothers you in your teens or 20 's etc it will probably still bother you in your 30's and 40's.
It's a psychological thing

Look at some of the HT photo's , there are guys in the their 50 , 60 and 70 's with HT 's.
If I were to hazard a guess they didn't get their HT's to bag chicks .

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Originally Posted by clandestine

All I'm saying is the younger you are, the less likely your hair loss will be accepted by peers and those around you. Young hair loss sufferers are not the norm.

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And I disagree with you
Lots of people buzz or shave their heads now a days
Teens, 20's, 30 's , 40's , 50 's etc
It is now considerd acceptable for men to shave their heads
No one gives a shit accept for those of us who don't have the balls to do it ourselves
No one gives it a second look when you see a guy with a buzzed head
But you see a guy with a grotesque comb over , you take a another look and ask why he doesn't just shave it off

And to finally make my point for 'older' guy's - Spencer ain't no spring chicken either (sorry dude;p) So should he give up as well and shave his hair off?

Personally I get weird vibes from 'Joe from Staten Island' when listening to him on the bald truth talk. Not to talk shit or pass judgement unnecessarily, but I feel at his age he's focusing a little more on his hair loss than he is his family /his kids. I listened to an episode where it was discussed how his (ten year old?) child had verbalized concerns regarding hair loss. Your focus becomes your reality, and one should be cautious when acting the position of a role model. We should by no means let this condition dictate our lives, and /or become especially obsessive over it. But this is especially the case when there are children in the equation, whom their parents have the utmost influence over. Not healthy. Just an observation.

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Originally Posted by Jcm800

And to finally make my point for 'older' guy's - Spencer ain't no spring chicken either (sorry dude;p) So should he give up as well and shave his hair off?

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Spencer lost his hair in his early twenies he never got to enjoy his hair other than in highschool BIG DIFFERENCE.

We are talking about guys who lose their hair in their late 30s late 40s who are like : "Omg im losing my hair my life is over! " what life? you already had a life...and I bet it was good...at least way better than us poor young hair loss sufferers.

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Originally Posted by DAVE52

Lots of people buzz or shave their heads now a days
Teens, 20's, 30 's , 40's , 50 's etc
It is now considerd acceptable for men to shave their heads

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Very true, I'm with you on that one.

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Originally Posted by DAVE52

No one gives a shit accept for those of us who don't have the balls to do it ourselves

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Any radical change in appearance, such as a buzz cut or shaved head from having hair (whatever degree) will be noticed. Yes, people will in time adjust to your change in appearance, this is natural, of course.

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Originally Posted by DAVE52

No one gives it a second look when you see a guy with a buzzed head

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Here is where our opinions differ. As discussed in previous threads, some people look better with buzzed or shaved heads, naturally. Head size, shape, and degree of hair loss are all clearly factors concerning how someone will look with a close crop.

I've tried buzzing my head before, in multiple instances. Problem is I have a smaller than average head size. This, coupled with my receded hairline, has put me off doing it for a while. I would also like to point out that degree of hair loss /temple recession becomes entirely more noticeable with a buzz cut. There is literally no hiding what you're dealing with.

The solution, you might say, is to shave completely. Again, I refer to points such as ideallic head characteristics, and the fact that cue ball is by no means a necessarily 'normal' haircut among youth (late teens, early 20s).

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Originally Posted by DAVE52

But you see a guy with a grotesque comb over , you take a another look and ask why he doesn't just shave it off

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Yes, you get to a certain point, you cut your losses, so to speak.

But you've come off my original point completely. I said the younger you are, the less likely your hair loss will be accepted by peers and those around you. Young hair loss sufferers are not especially the norm. I stand by this.

You're trying to tell me people who deal with any degree of hair loss are often too scared to either buzz or shave their heads. I'm telling you there are reasons this look is not a be all end all solution, but can only necessarily be deemed appropriate/inappropriate provided someone has already tried to do so.

My point remains, hair loss is hard at any age. Hair loss is especially hard among youth. We all suffer in a similar manner, but to varying degrees, considering various factors such as age, emotional stability, support, etc.

@Maradona:Every picture I've seen of him he's got a mop on his head and he ain't looking like he's in his 20's. Yep you have a point-up to the age of 38ish I had wicked hair, I've been very fortunate. so I hit 40 and am supposed to say **** it eh? Nah you're wrong it doesn't work like that, people care about their hair whatever age if - they have an any self respect and care about their appearance or whatever other reason.

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Originally Posted by Jcm800

But - i also get pissed off hearing younger guy's saying i shouldnt worry about it. Well, i do - and i alway's will. Luckily it's been a slow process for me - started around the age of 27, and hasn't been a rollercoaster ride to hell, but the ride is heading there - and you bet it concern's me.

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Understandable, absolutely. As I've said, it's shitter. Whatever your age, people worry.

How we cope with our worries and our fears is what's important. We should aspire to embrace our fears, and do away with our worries.

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Originally Posted by Maradona

Spencer lost his hair in his early twenies he never got to enjoy his hair other than in highschool BIG DIFFERENCE. .

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Looks like he still has hair

http://www.spencerkobren.com/about-2/

Akso , remmeber he's been taking meds ( Propecia ) for 17 years . I guess hairloss bothers him enough to continue to take meds for such a long time

"
August 27, 2008

On a personal note, I have been using the drug for more than fourteen years and at this point have experienced no adverse side effects that I am aware of. There are countless men all over the world who are successfully treating their hair loss with Propecia. In my opinion, at this point there is no known reason to be concerned about long term adverse side effects.

Hope this helps,
Regards,
Spencer Kobren "

Yes, at any age it sucks and people will worry but if you are 40 and cant get over hairloss, thats pretty bad. At some point you got to say screw it, im going to enjoy the time i have with my wife and kids. The young guys dont have that option, we still are searching for our identity.

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Originally Posted by john2399

Yes, at any age it sucks and people will worry but if you are 40 and cant get over hairloss, thats pretty bad. At some point you got to say screw it, im going to enjoy the time i have with my wife and kids. The young guys dont have that option, we still are searching for our identity.

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Err, do you think you'll ever get over your hairloss then?! Ok - you're searching for your identity, I understand that.

I'm losing mine, I had it, liked it and it's going, so I'm pissed as well.

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Originally Posted by john2399

...... but if you are 40 and cant get over hairloss, thats pretty bad. At some point you got to say screw it,..........

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Yup I agree
Wish I could do it
I still have to wake up and face the world
But Tell that to the guys who are in their 40, 50, 50 's and they still get HT 's

Well experiencing hairloss at a young age, ive grown as a person. Ive learned to appreciate the little things in life and i would do anything just to have atleast my teen years and 20s. So yes, i would get over hairloss if i was in my late 30s and 40s because its more acceptable in society. I can't walk around as a 19 year old bald guy and not feel like an alien. I said in my post, the day i get over hairloss is the day i have my first born. At some point you got to say screw it hairloss wont define me, but a young guy just can't say that, partly because we aren't even mature yet to understand why this is happening to us. You older guys should appreciate your prime years and say screw it, let me go play some sports with my kids and enjoy my family.

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Originally Posted by DAVE52

Yup I agree
Wish I could do it
I still have to wake up and face the world
But Tell that to the guys who are in their 40, 50, 50 's and they still get HT 's

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I agree with that too - I am thinking of buzzing it off this summer, luckily I'm in good shape and don't think I'm that ugly, still feel like its putting a gun to my head tho. I've always been known for my hair, losing it and facing my family of piss takers is a ****ing big deal for me, but I'll guess at 40 I'll have to man up ;)

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Originally Posted by Jcm800

@Maradona:Every picture I've seen of him he's got a mop on his head and he ain't looking like he's in his 20's. Yep you have a point-up to the age of 38ish I had wicked hair, I've been very fortunate. so I hit 40 and am supposed to say **** it eh? Nah you're wrong it doesn't work like that, people care about their hair whatever age if - they have an any self respect and care about their appearance or whatever other reason.

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I just meant the fact that you notice your hair is gonna go is traumatizing at a very young age this is what spencer goes through everyday since he was 20ish proscar (experimental drug at that time) minoxidil the fear of looking worse painting his head etc.

Just because he has a mop doesnt mean he is not suffering.

I agree its always devastating to lose your hair but losing at late 30s its more acceptable and it is no where near as devastating as your early 20s.

If i offended anyone I apologize, i guess i am somewhat jealous but I think i speak some truth when saying you should cope better when hair loss HITS YOU when youre old.

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Originally Posted by Jcm800

I agree with that too - I am thinking of buzzing it off this summer, luckily I'm in good shape and don't think I'm that ugly, still feel like its putting a gun to my head tho. I've always been known for my hair, losing it and facing my family of piss takers is a ****ing big deal for me, but I'll guess at 40 I'll have to man up ;)

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For encourgement

www.slybaldguys.com

Personally I know I'm not gonna look like Tom Cruise at his age and 99% of us won't look that good anyways so I've never had a problem going bald later in life because it's just how life is. You get old and you can't run as fast, jump as high, or look as good. Every once in a while you get that guy who has Ronald Reagan hair but a lot of men and women lose hair in old age and it's not seen as abnormal. When was the last time you saw a 50 year old guy and was shocked he was bald, it's common to see that. But now imagine seeing a high school senior going bald and you will be in disbelief. Losing hair in late 30s and beyond sucks but you can't say you didn't have a fair shot at life.

I'm sorry but this is just silly. There is nothing magical about being in your 30's or 40's that makes you stop caring about your appearance.
If you are bothered enough by hair loss to come to this forum, listen to TBT radio, etc., it's because you don't like seeing the rapid change in appearance (and others' perceptions). Age has nothing to do with it. I don't see what would give guys like me, in their 20's, the slightest idea that they should have some kind of monopoly on hairloss-related grief. Why should someone's age make a bit of difference? You don't morph into some kind of inhuman being once you hit 38, or 40, or 50. You're still a person with the same vulnerabilities and concerns (though maybe with some different priorities).

Also, there's nothing special about marriage or kids that makes you stop caring what you look like. And quite frankly most people in relationships, including marriages, do still care how the opposite gender perceives them... it's in our DNA to care.

Joe's situation is not that hard to understand. Hair loss is depressing. If anything, he's been dealing with it much longer than most of us, so it's no surprise he would be that down about it.

Yes, I hope to be better-equipped to deal with hair loss when I'm older, but I'm not assuming that will be the case. I'm in no position to pass judgments on people 10, 20 or 30 years older than me and act as if I know how they should feel and how they should react to something like hair loss.

We are all hair loss sufferers who need support. There is absolutely no use in a thread like this to drive wedges in the community based on something as meaningless as age. It's no better than female hair loss sufferers telling men to grow some balls and quit fretting over their hair loss - because after all, it's more socially acceptable to lose your hair as a man (even if you're 18) than as a woman, right?

25 going on 65 - respect to you, well said.

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Originally Posted by 25 going on 65

I'm sorry but this is just silly. There is nothing magical about being in your 30's or 40's that makes you stop caring about your appearance. Also, there's nothing special about marriage or kids that makes you stop caring what you look like.

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To complete the myth trifecta, I would note here that having money also will not make you stop caring about your appearance.

Age - may or may not make it easy to deal with one's hairloss. But, accepting it, makes it easy. If you hide behind comb-overs, concealers or hats you wont get over it (it will make it worse). Just let it be.

Going bald is a part of aging for 90% of men so it is easier to deal with in your late 30s 40s and 50s, same with loss of muscle mass, wrinkles, and dare I say, loss of sex drive. It's something that happens to large percentage of men as they grow older. Hair loss in your teens or early 20s, and obviously for females, is a very traumatic experience because it's not exactly natural. I would have been so happy if I was told at 18 that I would go bald at 30. That's just me though!