View Full Version : ...the saddest part about this; my life has only just begun.

02-23-2010, 07:47 AM
Hey people,

just need to vent I think because I'm about the blow up. Nobody really cares about me, and I know this because no one can help me. I've always had to find my own answers in life with no help from my family, and my father died when I was too young to blame him for this terrible mess I'm in and I'm only 20! I don't find things fun anymore. I don't, and I'm pretty sure I'm on the verge of suicide because of it. I'm almost positive that a doctor would diagnose me with bipolar disorder on the spot, and I'm one hundred percent positive that it has occurred because of hair loss.

20 Year old's review of:

Rogaine and Propecia (applied properly) = Expensive Remedy (used daily) =
mild to modest results with no satisfied change in appearance (personally, and others have said the same). In conjunction I would rate the two together as a 3/10. It's so pathetic that these are the best options. You don't feel any better taking it because you have to fork out so much money to continue to be unhappy in the state that your hair is in, with only hopes of not losing anymore, but not gaining any lost either. This is a joke to me, and one of the worst aspects of this whole ordeal.

I've been on Rogaine and Propecia for over a year and it only made my hairline, and the top of my head worse, and yet, I can't seem to stop buying these products because I have no more options (sucked in and fed up). AND I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE, read some of the other hairline destruction stories from these medications. It's funny, Rogaine and Propecia are both a fixed form hair loss and take complete advantage of anyone who loses their hair and want to "fix" anything. I blame both of these companies for this state that we're all in right now writing on these forums instead of being out being proactive and enjoying life which is what these products promise in the first place (I say promise because Propecia states it works in 85% of men which is their statistic which I think is quite flawed but hey, they'd be the only ones to know about that because they create these statistics). With ALL OF THE MONEY that they suck out of our pockets every month, you don't think that one of these companies, amongst other advancing constantly over a period of 20 YEARS, had or has had the means or technology to change this? I think they do or at least they have the money to at least fund the research (which I feel they OWE YOU AND I), they will not invest into anything because pharmaceutical company's DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH OR YOUR SPIRITUAL WELL BEING, they care about your money, and once that's gone they could care less about you. Just like other pharmaceutical company's, scumbags.

But I hate people that just complain, and thus I may have to seek an answer for myself, because apparently professionals and trained biologist, medical professionals and surgical technicians can't figure this conundrum out (with all of their education), so I've decided that I may need to think about perusing a career in medicine, being deeply concerned that we can land a robot on the surface of mars but cannot manage to regenerate a single hair follicle out of real tissue. Although Matri-stem Micromatrix and PRP seem to be picking up other professional socks, if you know what I mean...

I'm so sorry that this post sounds so ungrateful and/or depressing, but I've stood to reason that I've been patient, I've been calm, but now know that I am not equipped to solve this problem on my own. This is the biggest issue I've faced in regard to my mental health, and I feel as though I'm diminishing, the saddest part about this; my life has only just begun...

I've been consumed by hair loss and it's taken over my life. Not even just trying to find a cure, but completely questioning my position and stature as a member of the human civilization. I'm not sure where I sit anymore. I used to think I was strong, adaptable, pro forward moving, and important, and now I feel nothing. I'm not being a baby but I know that my thoughts are beyond me at this point. I've been depressed for the last 3 years of my life, pretty frequently, will not take mental pharmaceuticals and hair loss has completely hijacked my life. My life is now pretty miserable: no girl friend (I don't even hit on girls anymore because I'm hard as stone with no emotion), no more education because I'm so demotivated to go, and have a very scary vision of a future I never intended on partaking in. Oh and I'm angry, and I was never an angry person. I feel very backed up in the corner with no more options.

This is the worst thing that could happen to a teenager/ young adult. I'm sorry but it's true. It's the most progressive and public "loss of any type" that you will ever have to face. In a nutshell, having nothing to look forward to in the mirror every day can wreak havoc on the toughest person and their sanity, never mind that of a teenager who's supposed to be getting girls and thinking about the near future. I'd trade anyone of my extra organ's for a full head of hair at this point because I'm so afraid that I will never ever be happy again without it.

I don't feel worse for any woman over man who loses their hair, because they receive all of the attention while I have to feel like a fraud in any attempt at trying to salvage my old self. I'm sorry, but at this point it's how I feel and a miracle cure is all that will change this. I'm not built up of blame and sorrow, I'm just a kid. The doctor that cures baldness will win a Nobel Prize. You think more people would be working on this considering how many people have to face this on a day to day basis...

I don't want to be angry, sad, mentally unstable, bipolar, ungrateful, anxious, undesirable, suicidal, afraid, betrayed, unusable, untraceable, irregular, different, abnormal, not myself or old. In fact, these are all words up until 2 years ago that I would have never considered putting together in a sentence along with my own name. But now, I'm not so sure, just like every other aspect of my so uncertain future.

Mr. Kobren's done an honourable thing here with this community, and I'm positive that he's saved suicidal lives in the past decade. He's the greatest psychologist out there on the issue and his words are kind, sincere and pro forward moving (hopeful). I'm not sure I would have made it without this community and/or these answers to my surreal questions, and I would like him to know that I represent a lot of other teenagers/ young adults out there that feel this way, trapped and alone.

Thanks for your time.

02-23-2010, 08:34 PM
I was exactly where you are now and things will get better for you I PROMISE! Keep listening to Spencer's show, itís what got me through some of my tough years. Propecia does work, but for some people it takes time to realize itís working. Youíre so young and you have your whole life ahead of you! Have you thought about trying PRP?
Keep your chin up, it gets better, trust me!

02-24-2010, 01:51 AM
haha, damn man, now I'm depressed. f*** hair loss.

02-24-2010, 03:10 AM
At least you don't have... ah, screw it. There's really no words out there that can palliate hair loss. The only thing we can hope for is that a cure will come within 5 years, so we can salvage as much of our youth as possible. I honestly think that I'll have a terrible case of midlife crisis if/when the cure finally comes. I'll have the Michael Jackson syndrome of trying to relive the part of my life that I lost.

The hardest thing I found about progressive hair loss is that no matter how hard I fight to accept myself today, I'll have to fight harder tomorrow ...

03-01-2010, 06:46 PM
Hey there,

I know exactly how you feel - it's one thing to go bald when you're 40 something, but at that age it sucks. I was 18 when my hair started falling out, and I was almost completely bald by 21. I don't have to tell you how tough that is to accept, when only a few years before I'd had hair down to my shoulders. That was about 10 years ago now, and even though you do, eventually, get used to being bald, it's hard not to look in the mirror and remember what it was like to have hair. But then again it's not so bad - sure, I'd love to have hair again, but there are a lot of girls who like bald guys, and I didn't have a bad time in my early 20's.

At some point you have to make a choice, you can either continue letting it get you down, or you can say "sure I'm bald, but that doesn't define who I am - I'm good at X, Y, and Z", and if you're not good at x, y, or z then now's the time to get good. You could always start studying biology and chemistry, so that you can work on a solution. What greater motivation is there than to cure baldness - if you do that I'm sure we'll all buy you a beer :-)

(And thinking about Buckerines comment, I think you're right about trying to relive a lost part of your life - I kind of think I've had trouble growing up and acting like an adult because I'm stuck at 18. When they finally have a cure then I'll be able to move on)

03-01-2010, 07:28 PM
Hey, your post killed me. I really feel for you man. Im 26 now and have been on propecia for alittle over 13 months and i dont think its done much. I know its gotta be tough to be 20 and dealing with this, im 26 and it really sucks too. I gotta say though I know it seems insane, but bald guys do live dam good lives. I have two buddies totally bald who are in there mid 20s and they have pretty great lives. I get depressed to, my hair look especially bad today, but we gotta keep on trucking! Also think about this, theres a good chance (not a garuntee) that within the next 5 years we could have some new things popping up esp with Follica Inc. So think about it this way, you may go bald now at 20 and be bald till 25, 30, or 35, so you suck it up for 5 years (maybe even realize being bald is pretty ****ing sweet ;) )and than bam new treatments arrive and instint full head of hair with tons of your life to go!

I also think about something that happened to me when i was 20, I had a full obnoxious head of long hair, and was trying so hard to date this chick, believe me she was pretty much a 10, and she turned me down for a 20 year old bald guy (i think they are engaged now). Goes to show you hair doesnt really mean that much i guess:D

Stay Strong, Hang in there, Live life, and Know that you always have people to support you!

Fixed by 35
03-26-2010, 08:31 AM
Right, you didn't choose to lose your hair and I'm not going to try and convince you it's okay, because it isn't and never will be. I have no truck with the happy shavers or the iron pumpers, they're going to suffer a lot if a cure comes out that doesn't work on the long term Norwood 7s.

I'm incredibly negative about hair loss. Negativity is good, it keeps you going and it wards off any hirsute moron who thinks mockery or a 'get over it' pep speech is going to work. You need negativity and anger to stay motivated to beat hair loss and believe me we're going to. Never accept hair loss because when you do, that's the day you unconditionally surrender.

However, you need a strategy too. Anger is good, but you've got to master the control of it and to keep a clear head. You need a strategy, because what you have at the moment isn't working for you.

Propecia and minoxidil are the only FDA cleared treatments and the only thing your physician will prescribe. Sympathise with the guy; if he prescribes you with anything stronger he could get sued if you develop complications. That doesn't mean other things don't work.

For a start, I recommend you ditch Propecia and get onto Avodart. You can get a generic version of the drug called Dutas from Inhouse Pharmacy. It blocks both types of DHT, whereas Propecia only blocks one. The only thing stopping Glaxo selling this stuff for hair loss is that they haven't finished the clinical trials for hair loss and don't know how safe it is. However, if suicide is the only other option to hair regrowth for you, I'd say give this product a shot.

Next of all, minoxidil. Some claims that it is not delivered properly to the scalp. I've no idea how true that is. Get the stuff super strong and give it a whirl.

Once you've got the basics right, consider other causes. Sodium laurel sulfate found in shampoo is attributed to causing hair loss. The truth of this is debatable. I used Head & Shoulders shortly before I began to lose my hair; thousands of men and women complain of hair thinning using this product. However, this is anecdotal. Get a shampoo like revivogen or such, or just wash with water.

Next, go to the doctors and get a blood test and diabetes test. Don't just take the bog standard test as a given. Diabetes takes many years to be diagnosed sometimes. Tell the doctor clearly that even if glucose levels are acceptable, are they still higher than average? Do you have any family history of Type II diabetes? You need to identify that it is purely male pattern baldness.

Finally, check the web daily. DO take chances on new treatments, one day one of these treatments is going to work. When you approach a new treatment, do so with a healthy scepticism as follows:

1) Check the web for claims of a scam (never buy those web books on how 'I cured my hair loss.' Most of them recommend olive oil or burning witches - if you can't resist purchasing one then don't forget to ruin them by publishing the contents here and explaining why it doesn't work).

2) Check the company is legitimate. You can do this by checking where the company claims to be incorporated, then look at the country's registrar's webpage. For example, Companies House in the UK. They typically list registered companies.

3) Check the science isn't completely bogus to a lay person. Compare it to the science on sites like these.

With this approach, I think you will have your hair back one day. I wish I could be more precise, but this is cutting edge science we're dealing with. I know it always seems harder to get someone to the moon or Mars, but do bear in mind this largely involves vast amounts of fuel and explosions so it's clever, but not that clever!

Oh, and one more thing. Don't stop studying and pursue a career that you love. And leave town to somewhere no one knows you and cover up with a toupee or toppik. You will be disadvantaged because of your baldness, but not if no one knows you are bald. Most important, people will call you bald. Don't let them call you bald and unqualified.

03-28-2010, 04:56 PM
this might sound dumb but if I get to the point where my hair just looks like shit...

straight up im just shaving it... **** it. its not that big of a deal.

pump some iron and shave that shit. most often it looks cool

Fixed by 35
03-29-2010, 03:51 AM
For christ sake, not another one.

How many taunts of egg head, slap head, baldy and chrome dome do you need to realise the shaved head look is just the 90s comb over? The idea that you can just shave away and suddenly become happy is a load of bull. Pumping iron, as I have said countless times already, is a sign of not only giving in to baldness but giving up your life for it too.

No one looks good with a shaved head. No one. When people list the likes of Vin Diesel, Bruce Willis and Billy Zane, they're talking about people who looked better with hair and are UGLY. And to make matters worse, you can't just change your look, you seem to have to change your whole lifestyle to revolve around the gym too.

Baldness is not something you can just shave off. It's ugly and you're stuck with it forever. It's not like being overweight because you can't control it and it's not like having a few spots because they can be covered up. It's like losing an eye or having a huge scar. It is ugly on every sufferer. Get used to it.

Pretending it's okay by becoming a gymnasium meat head (and therefore ditching any personality you used to have in the process) might be great for people who were meat heads anyway, but it doesn't work for me or a great deal of people on the forum. Also, when you list all those shaved headed people, you always list meat head men - I don't want to be a meat head and meat heads aren't my heroes!

So will the shaving society please stop with this terrible, unhelpful advice.

The only way to accept baldness is to accept that you're ugly and to work on the inside. You won't have a great life, but you'll get by in the real world instead of a fantasy one where you think having a shaved head makes you look 'cool' instead of a prat. It's better to be a depressed realist doing what you want with your spare time than some fantasising pillock pumping his pecks.

Most people don't have a great life anyway, so get used to it. At least we don't live in a developing or third world country, we live reasonably comfortable lives and we haven't got severe disabilities. That we have lost our hair and life has lost it's shine is a shame, but we can get by. Life's crap for everyone, it's just ours is that bit more crap than others in the western world.