Originally Posted by ThinningB420
I hear your frustration. I'm a diffuse thinner and my hair looks terrible. I just want to shave it off. I'm not willing to risk the sides of fin so there is no real good option for me. Yes, I'm lucky I'm 28 and not totally bald like some but that doesn't make me feel any better. However, as my mom reminds me, you can't keep dwelling on something out of your control. At some point you need to just move on. I'm devastated that I won't find an attractive woman to marry because of my baldness. Yet, I also realize if I find the love of my life we both shouldn't care about things like that. So maybe I need to become less vain.
I try to be a very logical and rational person, but it's not really easy since I am a perfectionist at everything. Maybe going bald is the way I can overcome perfectionism and accept myself.
So it's not as cut and dry as I say it is, but that is why professional help is necessary for those struggling imo.
Very good post bro. I have badly receded temples and general thinning, but since I have long hair (have had long hair for like 11 years now), I can cover it up to a certain extent. I feel lucky too that I'm not totally bald, but yes, it doesn't make me feel much better either.
You say that you're a perfectionist; I am too to a certain extent. With regards to very important things in my life, I can be a perfectionist. Yet on the other hand, I really don't give a s**t about things that other people would flip out over. I have noticeable stretch marks near my armpits because I used to be a hardcore power-lifter and I've lifted weights for almost 20 years now. I'd bet these stretch marks would cause other people to flip out, yet I never gave a s**t about these stretch marks. I never complained when people made more money than me, had a better-looking girlfriends, or were in better shape than me. But I am kind of a perfectionist when it comes to my hair because, like you, I'm afraid that I won't be able to go out with the same beautiful women that I would if I had a full head of hair. Also, you may have read from some of my other posts that I'm big into the rock n roll scene, so having a full head of hair is integral in that scene.
Your mom is right to a certain extent when she says that at some point a person does need to move on and not dwell on something that they cannot change. As a matter of fact, my mom says the same thing with regards to moving on. However, it just frustrates me so much that we are really not given any real opportunity to change something that causes such heartache to so many men. I mean, in today's day and age, there are so many things that a person CAN change. For instance, I used to be a skinny kid with not much muscle mass at all. However I didn't like the way that I looked so I started lifting weights and got much bigger and stronger. Hell, GNC's aisles are lines with products that can help a person achieve muscle mass, but we don't have any real options to regrow hair.
I'm actually on finasteride right now and I have been for about 2 years. It's helped with regards to slowing down my hair loss but it hasn't done anything in terms of regrowth. I'd actually recommend finasteride because it does help, but not nearly to the degree that I'd like it to. But I am experiencing the side effects though, so I'm not sure that I can commit to it for the long haul.
Anyway, as I said before, you do seem like a sensible person and it helps to read your posts. With regards to hair loss, we're all in this together so it really does help to read about the experiences and opinions of other hair loss sufferers.