Hi everyone! I only joined recently because i've become worried about my hair thinning out. I've been reading lots of the stuff on here and it's made me feel confident enough to share. I'm so glad i can vent this sans judgement.
My dad (58) has been bald (complete horseshoe) for as long as any pictures of him tell, we haven't spoken about it but it must've been early twenties. My brother (20) doesn't seem to be experiencing anything yet. My balding only started one month ago at the start of the new school year but it has progressed rapidly. I'm not sure whether stress was the trigger because it was an extremely hectic start to the term. All i know is that in my school photo my hair is sticking up because it's so thick (and greasy
) but now it's limp and lifeless. I first took notice when i was running shampoo through my hair and i counted the hairs that came out (20-30 in one stroke). It's generally not yet noticeable because i wash daily to keep the volume up and to stop the grease, and i've only told my mum so far. She insisted that she couldn't see anything and when i went to my hairdresser she said nothing was wrong. This was two weeks ago. It's much worse now. Although i am a bit annoyed at them i think i'm preffering the lies to harsh reality. My hairline hasn't noticeably receded but it's starting, general thinning overall mostly.
A problem i'm having is the itching. I think it has exacerbated the problem immensely because i can't stop scratching or running my hands through my hair. As soon as i stop it just gets worse. It only stops when my mind's occupied, i'm exercising or for sometimes no reason at all. Every time one or two hairs fall out and it's seriously starting to add up.
I've always known i was going to go bald, but ofc not this soon. I hoped i'd be out of school, because sporting a shaved head in your teens is not in any case an ideal situation. I've looked into treatments and all that jazz, but nothing i can foreseeably see helping me. I'm too young to get propecia and by the time i can (1 month, counting the days
), the damage will have been done. There's also the hideous expense of the drug which i can't ask my parents to pay. Assuming it continues at this rate, i could be completely bald by the end of the year, with noticeability severely increasing over the next month or so.
Plenty of people i know and teachers in school are bald, including my tutor who's just turned 29, but i feel reluctant going to see anyone. The other people in my year-group who've started balding (because now it's all i look for in people), seem to be receding hairline types, and are also more popular and outgoing than me which in part makes up for it. I envy this. A big problem i've come across it the feeling that the hair on crown of my head is gone, and since it's very difficult to manage looking at it without the help of several mirrors, i get very self conscious about walking in front of people and sitting at the front in class. I also avoid wet weather when possible, which is hard in England.
Sometimes i wonder why i don't talk to my dad about it. He's been through the same thing right? I feel like i can't start moaning and whining about it until we've discussed it. It would feel like i'm insulting him. He jokes about it all the time and never seems to be worried about it. Then again, he is retired and only really leaves the house to take the dog for a walk. I don't think my mum could possibly understand either, even though i'm closer to her. She says i shouldn't worry and that it isn't a big deal but it kinda is! I dread telling my friends, cos they've all got nice long locks and parents with the same. It's not as if they'd reject me or anything but i know it would be hard.
I'm not sure what i'll look like with a shaved head, although it'll definitely look better that the horseshoe my dad's had all his life. One thing im scared about is seeing people i see infrequently. One moment i have hair, the next i don't. Kinda weird huh? I'm also scared about not getting used to it or not being able to embrace it, after reading so many stories on this forum. I just have to face the reality that my life with hair was short yet sweet, and i'll just have to prepare myself for this next stage
Thanks again to you all ,if you could be bothered to make it this far, for making this a little less unbearable!