I am a 33 year old male who began to thin in my mid 20's. I really didn't notice at the time (I was in the military and kept my hair very short). When my mother saw me for the first time in 4 years she was shocked at how thin my hair had become and immediately pulled out a bottle of toppik which she uses for her very thin hair. I was not interested but she sprinkled some into my hair anyway. I was amazed. I liked it. I hadn't realized how thin my hair had become. I really, really liked the way my hair suddenly looked so thick. That was when the whole horror story began. For a while the toppik was a miracle. I sprinkled a tiny bit on, used a little hair spray and it looked great. My gf at the time who hadn't seen me for a few weeks said "wow. your hair got so much darker!" I told her of course, but she was still shocked at how well it worked. There would be a little greenish colored sweat coming from my head when I sweated profusely but other than that it was a real miracle. Needless to say my hair continued to get thinner and I was now using tons of the stuff along with this scalp paint. I was not happy with the situation. I saw commercials for hair transplants and jumped at the opportunity. WORST decision of my whole life!!! I must say that the doctor pretty much did everything to steer me in another direction. He was very moral about the whole thing. It was only after months of persistence on my part that he relented and performed the graft. It was ok at first. I kept using the toppik and now I had a little more of my own hair to work with, but I did have to keep my hair much longer b/c the scar was a million times worse than I thought it would be. Soon, however, the thinning got worse and worse and toppik and couvre were simply not an option. I was too thin on top to use concealors so I just decided to bite the bullet and shave my head (not with a razor - with a # 1 guard). I thought it looked ok - except for the really huge scar at the back. I didn't look good but I didn't think that I looked bad. I showed up at work the next day (almost exactly 1 year ago) and aside from some days in the army it was the worst day of my life. I had never been made to feel so bad about myself. People said the most unbelievably hurtful things imaginable. I was the butt of everyone's jokes, people stared, gaped, laughed, and asked "Why on earth did you do that?". Nonetheless I said "they'll get used to it" and kept on keeping on. It did not abate. Weeks went by and then months and the ridicule continued. I couldn't believe it but I was starting to become seriously depressed. I had always been a very proud man and very self-confident. Now I was becoming a recluse. I was miserable. I didn't want to face the world anymore. A female friend approached me and said "jack, you've got to get a hair piece. A shaved head is fine but with your scars you look very scary and unattractive" I basically said that I would sooner die, but after months of misery I finally relented and got a rug. I've been wearing a rug for close to a year now. I hate it. There's not a day that goes by that I don't want to tear it off and just shave my head. Sometimes it looks ok, but most of the time it looks like a ridiculous joke. The thing is it placates the people at work. They know I'm wearing a rug, but its easier to look at than my bald horribly scarred pate so nobody says anything positive or negative. The rug is such an unbelievable pain in the neck - every aspect of it. I hate it so much. I hate the fact that I have to wear it to conceal the scars from the worst decision of my life. All I want is to shave my head and be free of this but I saw what happened when I did that. People did not get used to it even after months and as far as women were concerned - forget it. That sugery ruined my life. I try to think of the rug as if it were an eye patch, something to conceal what's underneath not to fool anyone into thinking that I have hair. I will never blame the doctor b/c he basically did all he could to talk me out of the procedure. It is my fault completely. My vanity did this to me. All those sites that say "just shave your head. everyone will get used to it in a couple of days" Please! If you're young, losing your hair and thinking of a HT STOP!!! Talk to the doc. about every aspect of the procedure - how thick the donor area is, what to realistically expect, how HUGE the scar will be. Honestly, don't do it. You'll end up like me - can't shave my head, stuck in a frickin rug, social life gone. I curse myself everyday for my rash decision that has basically ruined my life. I am more miserable than I could ever convey in words. Going bald sux, but the "solutions" just make it all worse. As I said the doctor did virtually do everything he could to convince me not to do it. He made me wait months, talk to patients who had undergone the procedure, showed me that my donor area was not ideal, told me NOT to expect anything like full coverage. What can I say? I am an absolute idiot.
I'm sorry to hear about your plight. Have you never considered propecia for your hairloss?
I know you wish you'd never had surgery, but have you considered that you might be repairable?
Lastly, does your mother always have a bottle of toppik on her or were you just lucky that day? :)
09-14-2010 04:23 PM
Jack21
I am sure my mother would love to know that you are knocking the fact that she suffers from alopecia as well. I did in fact try propecia. I used it for years - while I was using concealers, but stopped when I realized that the battle was lost i.e. when there was more powder and paint on my scalp than hair follicles.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mattj
I'm sorry to hear about your plight. Have you never considered propecia for your hairloss?
I know you wish you'd never had surgery, but have you considered that you might be repairable?
Lastly, does your mother always have a bottle of toppik on her or were you just lucky that day? :)
09-14-2010 05:17 PM
mattj
Oh, sorry, I didn't consider that your mother might use it herself. And I was replying to this:
Quote:
When my mother saw me for the first time in 4 years she was shocked at how thin my hair had become and immediately pulled out a bottle of toppik. I was not interested but she sprinkled some into my hair anyway.
Which probably amused anyone who read the post before you edited it. So if you felt your words originally lacked vital context it wasn't exactly reasonable to be so touchy.
I only wanted to help. So it seems that you have lost a lot of hair, and have areas that are too far gone for concealers, and propecia lost effectiveness or didn't do anything at all.
Without knowing how much hair has been lost in total we can't tell if you could still benefit from a transplant, but if not there are options to improve the scar. The scar can be re-opened and closed so that it is thinner. You can have grafts taken via the FUE method and then used to help disguise the scar. It is also possible to have the scar tissue covered with tiny dot tattoos which mimic stubble, but you'd need to research thoroughly as the results probably vary a great deal. There was a thread somewhere which showed this and the results were surprisingly good.
I don't know if you do have any interest in trying to minimize the scar as I'm sure you know you won't be able to make it disappear, so perhaps yours is just a cautionary tale, but a lot of guys have gone from looking truly shocking to normal, so you might be surprised.
09-14-2010 05:34 PM
Jack21
You are quite right. As originally worded it sounded a bit funny that my mother just happened to have a bottle of toppik at hand. I did not explain that she suffers from female pattern baldness and has been using it for years. Sorry about being so touchy. This is just a touchy subject.
I actually would be interested in minimizing the scar. I have researched dermabrasion (sp?) and "stubble" tattooing. I worry, however, that doing anything else would just make things worse....not that they could really be any worse. Can you tell me more about the possibilities of minimizing the appearance of the scar?
Quote:
Originally Posted by mattj
Oh, sorry, I didn't consider that your mother might use it herself. And I was replying to this:
Which probably amused anyone who read the post before you edited it. So if you felt your words originally lacked vital context it wasn't exactly reasonable to be so touchy.
I only wanted to help. So it seems that you have lost a lot of hair, and have areas that are too far gone for concealers, and propecia lost effectiveness or didn't do anything at all.
Without knowing how much hair has been lost in total we can't tell if you could still benefit from a transplant, but if not there are options to improve the scar. The scar can be re-opened and closed so that it is thinner. You can have grafts taken via the FUE method and then used to help disguise the scar. It is also possible to have the scar tissue covered with tiny dot tattoos which mimic stubble, but you'd need to research thoroughly as the results probably vary a great deal. There was a thread somewhere which showed this and the results were surprisingly good.
I don't know if you do have any interest in trying to minimize the scar as I'm sure you know you won't be able to make it disappear, so perhaps yours is just a cautionary tale, but a lot of guys have gone from looking truly shocking to normal, so you might be surprised.
09-14-2010 05:51 PM
Winston
There's a lot that ca be done to improve widened scars. You should post some images of the scar so some of the experts here can give you advice. Also did you ever use couvre or demmatch on the scar?
09-14-2010 06:02 PM
morelocks
Thanks for sharing Jack, I hope one day soon they figure out a solution or release hm so people like us can get our life s back
09-14-2010 06:53 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by Winston
There's a lot that ca be done to improve widened scars. You should post some images of the scar so some of the experts here can give you advice. Also did you ever use couvre or demmatch on the scar?
I'll do that. Post photos of the scar that is. I did used to put couvre over the scar for a while, and it did disguise the scar. When there was just not enough hair left on top, howeve, I really had no choice other than to shave my head. The scar is not visible when my hair is long enough like it is now but I wear a damned rug on the top. I suppose that I could grow out all my hair, but then of course I would look like my grandfather - thick on the sides and almost bald on top. I am pretty much stuck with this rug or finding a job where I can wear a hat.
09-14-2010 07:45 PM
johnasdfd
im so sorry to hear what happened in your case... have you tried a real short cut that would sufficiently cover the scar, while not let you have too much of a differential between the top and the sides ?
09-14-2010 07:50 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnasdfd
im so sorry to hear what happened in your case... have you tried a real short cut that would sufficiently cover the scar, while not let you have too much of a differential between the top and the sides ?
I have tried that. I look less frightening as the scars are not visible but I look like a 50 year old man b/c the difference in density at the point where the scar is no longer visible is very great. I could go in that direction I suppose. I would just be very ugly rather than frightening. I used to be a decent looking guy. Even for men - shit even for old soldiers - its tough to go from being a decent looking guy to being an ugly, old looking guy.
09-14-2010 07:52 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnasdfd
im so sorry to hear what happened in your case... have you tried a real short cut that would sufficiently cover the scar, while not let you have too much of a differential between the top and the sides ?
thanks for the sympathy btw. This is the first time I've gone "public" with this stuff and so this is the first time I've ever had anyone express sympathy. So thanks - even though I don't deserve it since the fault is completely mine.
09-15-2010 06:41 AM
Don'tDoIt
I agree with the suggestion that you let it grow long enough on the sides and in back to cover the scar, and then ditch the rug.
You fear that this strategy will make you look "ugly," but I think you will look just fine. Having a horseshoe of hair is better than having a rug and, in your case, better than exposing the scar.
09-15-2010 07:55 AM
Jack21
Sooner or later that will have to happen b/c I can't take this rug anymore. It is ridiculous looking and restricts my life in so many ways. I would NEVER have gotten it if I had not been approached by a female friend who actually said "You need to get a hair system". Other people told me "Just put on a hat, anything to cover your head". I've been physically wounded and it didn't feel as bad as those words. Seriously. I even had a woman tell me that she would be unable to continue working with me b/c she was so put off by my scalp. Can you believe that? It's gospel. When I heard that..well yo ucan imagine how that feels.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Don'tDoIt
I agree with the suggestion that you let it grow long enough on the sides and in back to cover the scar, and then ditch the rug.
You fear that this strategy will make you look "ugly," but I think you will look just fine. Having a horseshoe of hair is better than having a rug and, in your case, better than exposing the scar.
09-15-2010 10:05 AM
Don'tDoIt
Jack21, is there a reason aside from your aversion to the horshoe look that prevents you from discarding the piece?
For example, is there something about the recipient area that makes you unwilling to get rid of the rug? Do the grafts look pluggy or unnatural? Because there are options for dealing with unnatural-looking grafts, such as removal of the grafts via laser or FUE. If you can post an image of your recipient area, that would be helpful.
09-15-2010 10:23 AM
Jack21
Yes. The recipient area is bumpy and "pluggy" looking. I will get some batteries for my camera and post soon. Would you explain to me what FUE is?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Don'tDoIt
Jack21, is there a reason aside from your aversion to the horshoe look that prevents you from discarding the piece?
For example, is there something about the recipient area that makes you unwilling to get rid of the rug? Do the grafts look pluggy or unnatural? Because there are options for dealing with unnatural-looking grafts, such as removal of the grafts via laser or FUE. If you can post an image of your recipient area, that would be helpful.
09-15-2010 10:40 AM
Don'tDoIt
In response to your question, FUE means Follicular Unit Extraction. For patients undergoing a hair transplant, FUE means taking individual follicular units from the back of the head and putting them one follicular unit at time, in the balding areas.
Relevant to your situation, FUE can also be used to remove transplanted hairs in repair patients who have pluggy recipient areas. Some patients have posted their photos of FUE plug removal. Searching this site and searching the repair section of the Hair Loss Help website can produce examples for you.
Several patients have had good results getting their grafted hairs lasered off as opposed to removal by FUE.
09-15-2010 11:27 AM
CIT_Girl
Your story is heart-wrenching to read. I can't believe how cruel some people can be. I think, at this point, you need to do what you can to get away from feeling that you need to wear the hair piece since it is obviously such a burden for you.
As a couple posters have mentioned, there are options for dealing with the scarring in your donor area. Some doctors perform scar revisions (though the results can be a little unpredictable- particularly if your skin is already very stretched from strip surgery) and there's also the option to have some grafts placed in the scar to try and conceal it. I would say that we do at least one or two scar grafting sessions on patients who are dissatisfied with their strip scars each week. Here's one example from our website:
As far as the pluggy-looking recipient area, you can either add hair to camouflage that appearance, redistribute the plugs, or remove them entirely.
09-15-2010 11:41 AM
Jack21
I can tell you that my scar is far, far worse than the one in the photograph. If my scar were that minor I would have absolutely no second thoughts about shaving or buzzing my hair. Even with the length of hair in the after picture my scar would be very noticeable. The doctor obviously removed a very large area of skin from which to take the follicular units - much larger an area than in the case of this patient. My hair has to be about 1 inch long to conceal the scar. The hair in that after picture is between 1/2" - 3/4". I suppose that I should at least see a surgeon who could tell me if there is any hope in reducing the appearance of the scar and recipient area.
His scar repair looks great. Do you have any pictures of your scar?
09-15-2010 11:57 AM
CIT_Girl
Yes, it's definitely worth consulting with a physician to see what they can do for you. A lot of IAHRS physicians even offer virtual consultations where you can submit photos for their review, and they will offer recommendations based on these. These consults should all be free-of-charge as well. I would definitely suggest posting a photo of your scar, if you feel comfortable, so that we can get a better idea of where you are at.
A larger scar like this will likely take more than one pass to adequately conceal but there is certainly plenty of room for improvement and to allow this patient to feel more comfortable wearing his hair short.
09-15-2010 11:59 AM
Winston
Jack, can I ask where you had your hair transplant done? Even if the doctor takes a big strip the scar still can be very thin.
09-15-2010 12:05 PM
chasguy
As I understand it, scar size is more related to individual scalp laxity and scar tendencies
09-15-2010 12:49 PM
Jack21
My scar is virtually identical to the one in the last picture you posted. It is not as fresh or bloody ,obviously, because 5 years have passed, but in size, shape, length and thickness it is virtually identical. You must understand that b/c of my experience I am very, very reluctant about having anyone take anything sharp to my head or any part of me for that matter. I have also had to have numerous shoulder surgeries since I was discharged which have left my shoulder,arm, and part of my neck covered in surgical scars and arthroscope puncture holes.
09-15-2010 01:23 PM
mattj
I understand that it might be tough to reveal yourself without the piece, but it would help us help you if you could show us how you look. Both the scar and the front/top of your head. It sounds like you might be in Norwood 6 territory (are you familiar with the Norwood scale?) with at least some hair on top, including some unnatural-looking transplanted hair. Guys like this get fixed. See forum and transplant vet Jotronic.
09-15-2010 02:28 PM
cep
pics
I'm so sorry to hear about what you have had to suffer through. I have to tell you that from looking at your pics (I am a woman) you are certainly VERY handsome. Hair loss sucks, there is no getting around it, but I wonder if you realize how nice looking you are+you're buff too! I would hate for the hair issue to make you feel socially isolated when you seem to have so much going for you.
09-15-2010 02:43 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by mattj
I understand that it might be tough to reveal yourself without the piece, but it would help us help you if you could show us how you look. Both the scar and the front/top of your head. It sounds like you might be in Norwood 6 territory (are you familiar with the Norwood scale?) with at least some hair on top, including some unnatural-looking transplanted hair. Guys like this get fixed. See forum and transplant vet Jotronic.
No, no. I am not reluctant at all about posting pics of my scalp. I just have never taken a photograph of the scar. I do have photos of myself with a shaved head from last October on my other computer. I can post those tomorrow. I am not very familiar with the Norwood Scale, but I can tell you that my scalp is in fact completely covered in stubble with the exception of a small area around the crown. It is not that there is no hair. It is that the hair is so diffuse when longer than stubble. When I shave my head to stubble it looks as if I could easily grow out a full head of hair, but that is NOT the case.
09-15-2010 02:47 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by cep
I'm so sorry to hear about what you have had to suffer through. I have to tell you that from looking at your pics (I am a woman) you are certainly VERY handsome. Hair loss sucks, there is no getting around it, but I wonder if you realize how nice looking you are+you're buff too! I would hate for the hair issue to make you feel socially isolated when you seem to have so much going for you.
Thanks for the kind words. Unfortunately the hair issue has made me terribly socially isolated. I am not so good looking with a bald head. Believe me.
His scar repair looks great. Do you have any pictures of your scar?
If I could get those results I would be very happy, but I seem to remember saying exactly the same thing to myself before my HT 5 years ago. I have seen a number of men over the years with shaved heads or v. closely cropped hair whose surgical scars from HTs were very obvious. I've seen men like this at the gym, at football games, at the grocery store. They were obviously at peace with their appearance. I mean they could all have been wearing baseball caps but weren't. I need to make peace with my apperance and try and salvage some sort of life. Mine is a cautionary tale. I have let obsession with my hair ruin the last 5 or 6 years of my life. I wish that I had never heard of any of these "solutions" whether surgery, concealers, or toupees. I wish that I had just kept my head shaved when I got out of the army. My best friend starting balding in college, shaved his head right then and there and has never looked back. He is the most self confident person I know and lives a happy life while I hide in my apartment b/c I am so ashamed of my appearance.
09-15-2010 04:10 PM
dgman21
Jack,
Thanks for sharing your story. I amletting my hair obssession get the best of me like your saying. Now I was told by a surgeon in person consultation that he will do 600 grafts but that doesnt seem like much due to my diffuse and frontal thinning. I have never had surgery before. I am too freaked out to shave my head due to the thinning area being very noticeable.
09-15-2010 04:19 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by Winston
Jack, can I ask where you had your hair transplant done? Even if the doctor takes a big strip the scar still can be very thin.
I do not want to name the surgeon for the following reasons:
He did virtually everything he could to talk me out of the procedure. Only after he was positive that I understood what to reasonably expect did he perform it. He made me wait months, discussed alternatives such as my just cropping all my hair short, and essentially tried to make me go away. I convinced him that I fully understood that the procedure would not provide me with a full head of hair and that I understood that my own naturally growing hair would continue to thin. Finally about 6 months after I first saw him did he perform the procedure. He could have done nothing more other than refusing to perform the procedure. This is called an "elective procedure" for a reason, however. I elected to have it done and I had covinced the doctor that my expectations were realistic. The fault is mine. I was young, desperate, and although I convinced both the doctor and myself that my expectations for the procedure were realistic, they were not.
09-15-2010 05:01 PM
Jack21
Quote:
Originally Posted by dgman21
Jack,
Thanks for sharing your story. I amletting my hair obssession get the best of me like your saying. Now I was told by a surgeon in person consultation that he will do 600 grafts but that doesnt seem like much due to my diffuse and frontal thinning. I have never had surgery before. I am too freaked out to shave my head due to the thinning area being very noticeable.
From what I recall I had about 1,500 micrografts. If I recall this was something of a "mini graft". There is nothing "mini" about the scar, however. There are of course numerous variables involved in this procedure that will determine the size of the scar (the density of the donor area and many others). Unless there has been a miracle in the science of HT in the past 5 years you will be left with a long scar at the back of your head. Long enough hair will cover the scar. If you are happy with having longish hair on the sides and back and considerably thinner hair on top, who am I to stand in your way? It is about reasonable expectations. As my doctor told me "You will NOT have a full head of hair. You will NOT look like you did 5 years ago. You will get more thickness on top, but that is all." What I managed to somehow completely ignore in this whole thing was the scar that would result. I did actually ask the doc. how long my hair would have to be to conceal the scar, and he said about 3/4" to 1". He was right. It was abslutely fine for a while - the results of the transplant coupled with toppik and couvre that is. Once my hair began to thin too much to be disguised by concealers, however, the game was up. Try to find a picture of a person who has had a HT and who was told ahead of time that his donor area was ideal in terms of density. I look at these model photos posted by physicians themselves and still think to myself that they look lousy. I cannot make up your mind for you, but I can tell you that my youth, desperation, and terror of losing my looks actually had the effect of ruining my looks. Let's face it. A shaved head does not look so good on most people. It does, however, look far, far better than a head with obvious surgical scars. Do not allow desperation get the better of you. If this happens (as it did with me) you will end up miserably disappointed or simply miserable. As my surgeon said to me "Why not just buzz your hair. You're a good looking guy." A shaved or buzzed head coupled with a good physique is not such a bad thing. Society is very odd. People see the scars on my shoulder and arm and say "Wow. what a badass etc etc." People see scars on my head and they recoil in horror. Do nothing rash. Research, research, research BUT never forget that whatever happens if you do have a HT you will have a long and possibly thick scar from ear to ear. I loved my shaved head and kept my hair shaved or very, very short for most of my time in the army. When on leave with a shaved head I met the girl I would end up marrying. She divorced me just about the same time I became horribky obsessed with my hair. It was not a coincidence.
09-15-2010 06:01 PM
Don'tDoIt
CIT girl, I am surprised that you would use the before/after images for that patient who obviously has longer hair in the "after" photo. The longer hair makes it impossible to tell if Dr. Cole's work really had an impact. Why did you choose this case?
If Dr. Cole is truly doing one of these types of cases per week, why are there not more results on your website showing that these scars are being improved? I am not saying that Dr. Cole is not getting good results with this technique but rather I am saying that the documentation is lacking.
It seems that Jack21 would benefit from FUE into his scar but I would first like to see some more FUE-into-scar success stories.
09-15-2010 06:12 PM
Don'tDoIt
deleted because of a double post
09-15-2010 06:16 PM
Don'tDoIt
Jack21 you should go to the hair loss help website and scroll down the page until you get to the section titled "Hair Transplant Repair." You should then read every thread in that section going back at least to last year. There is a huge amount of information in there. You need to do this to educate yourself about your options. It is at hair loss help with no spaces between the words hair loss help. It is a dot com site. After the dot com type in /forums.
Another way to find this site is to type "hair loss help forum" into a Google search and the site will be the first site of the Google search results.
Spencer, if you read this, sorry about plugging another website but I think that Jack21 deserves all the help that we can give, considering what he has gone through.
09-15-2010 06:40 PM
Jack21
thanks
Thank you. I've found it and am beginning to go through the posts. I really appreciate your help.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Don'tDoIt
Jack21 you should go to the hair loss help website and scroll down the page until you get to the section titled "Hair Transplant Repair." You should then read every thread in that section going back at least to last year. There is a huge amount of information in there. You need to do this to educate yourself about your options. It is at hair loss help with no spaces between the words hair loss help. It is a dot com site. After the dot com type in /forums.
Another way to find this site is to type "hair loss help forum" into a Google search and the site will be the first site of the Google search results.
Spencer, if you read this, sorry about plugging another website but I think that Jack21 deserves all the help that we can give, considering what he has gone through.
09-16-2010 07:14 AM
chasguy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack21
My scar is virtually identical to the one in the last picture you posted. It is not as fresh or bloody ,obviously, because 5 years have passed, but in size, shape, length and thickness it is virtually identical. You must understand that b/c of my experience I am very, very reluctant about having anyone take anything sharp to my head or any part of me for that matter. I have also had to have numerous shoulder surgeries since I was discharged which have left my shoulder,arm, and part of my neck covered in surgical scars and arthroscope puncture holes.
For the shoulder scars, try Cica Care silicone sheeting and see if they are improved. If they are, perhaps the same could be applied to your HT scar. Cica Care has had some really really positive reviews
09-16-2010 07:17 AM
chasguy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack21
If I could get those results I would be very happy, but I seem to remember saying exactly the same thing to myself before my HT 5 years ago. I have seen a number of men over the years with shaved heads or v. closely cropped hair whose surgical scars from HTs were very obvious. I've seen men like this at the gym, at football games, at the grocery store. They were obviously at peace with their appearance. I mean they could all have been wearing baseball caps but weren't. I need to make peace with my apperance and try and salvage some sort of life. Mine is a cautionary tale. I have let obsession with my hair ruin the last 5 or 6 years of my life. I wish that I had never heard of any of these "solutions" whether surgery, concealers, or toupees. I wish that I had just kept my head shaved when I got out of the army. My best friend starting balding in college, shaved his head right then and there and has never looked back. He is the most self confident person I know and lives a happy life while I hide in my apartment b/c I am so ashamed of my appearance.
Even if the improvement were only modest, it is still an improvement and still going to help you recover some of your own self esteem
09-16-2010 07:56 AM
Jack21
acceptance
Quote:
Originally Posted by chasguy
Even if the improvement were only modest, it is still an improvement and still going to help you recover some of your own self esteem
What could be improved? The appearance of the scar? As I understand it that requires further surgery. Surgery is what got me into this mess in the first place, and my surgeon was far from incompetent. He is in fact very well known. Having another surgical procedure to try and minimize the appearance of a previous surgical procedure MAY yield some positive results ultimately. I do not want to gamble on MAY.
I am perfectly content with the way I look with a shaved head - scar and all. I need to be strong enough to weather the months of insults and frightened/ horrified looks and wait it out until people accept my looks. My plan is to come back after Christmas vacation with my hair shaved with a #1. By winter I will be pale and the difference in color between my scalp and my face will not be so pronounced. The world is going to just have to get used to "Jack the bald guy" who used to be "Jack the good looking guy". I got through some horrible years in the army, I will get through this. I have to.
09-16-2010 08:27 AM
Jack21
This is what I look like with a buzz and a bit of that thickening spray. You can't see the scar at the back, of course, which is the major drawback to doing this. Also if you look more closely (which you cannot do in this poor quality pic) at my head you would see that it is very unnatural looking - like a bit of stubble and a bit of paint.
